My baby boy
We just lost our baby boy 3 days ago. I'm devastated, heartbroken and totally wrecked. I don't even feel hunger and everything at home reminds me of him. The moment we were at the vet with him during his final hours keeps on re playing on my mind. He's been with us for 15 years and I can say that he was a spoiled boy since he's our only baby boy in the family, he was like a Daddy's boy". He has lived a good life full of love, support and care from us. We lost him to Cushings disease...horrible lifelong condition that has no cure but only management.
He was like a "son" to me, I know most people won't understand but my dogs are family to me. Our emotional bond for 15 years was so profound and unconditional. I'm thinking if he's already at peace now that he's gone. Is he happy now? Is he in the rainbow bridge? I miss him so so much that cry all the time. When I'm at work I just go to the washroom and cry my heart out. The pain in my chest is too much...I can't even feel hunger or thirst, I can only feel this deep sadness inside me. My heart cries "I miss my dog, I want my dog, I need my dog" But I know things won't be the same as it used to be, no more happiness waiting at the garage door wagging his tail and barking as if he's saying "mommy's here!", no more following me around the house, kitchen toilet and shower, no more cuddles and kissy kissy and nose bites, no more sounds of walking paws on the floor..no more happiness...and it hurts so so much. I always keep on praying for my dog's health and i pray that they would still live long but maybe God has plans and it really is his time to go...I don't know, I don't understand. My heart is broken. It's like a huge part of my heart was ripped off and now I feel incomplete..I don't know how this grief will last, the only thing I know is I want to cry, cry and cry my heart aches so much.