u/Doll_Lover_

I hate this character. Like so incredibly much. That being said, there's one moment that I genuinely will give him credit for and it's in season 1, episode 4 when he suggests they take Debbie to see a therapist after she kidnaps Casey. Debbie fixed a broken stroller and lured a 2 year old out from his yard with a candy bar. That's incredibly concerning, and even if she didn't mean any harm, that was the first of many signs that she wasn't okay. And maybe if she had gotten the help she needed, her life could've turned out so much better. But instead, Fiona and co brush off Jimmy/Steve/Jack's suggestion and are like "she just accidentally took a baby". And people act like she was pure and innocent in season 1. She wasn't. She wasn't malicious yet but she definitely wasn't as innocent as people on here like to claim. (And yes, I'm aware it's called "Shameless". That's not the point of this post.)

Since mid-July, I've been having these intense crying episodes where I'm crying super heavily uncontrollably. And it won't stop. It got so bad that I checked myself into a mental hospital. What was it that started? I'd read the Haunting and Hunting Adeline books after the move announcement and it triggered my PTSD from being sexually abused so bad that I haven't been the same since.

I just want to be okay. It's been 3 years since I met my abuser and I just...I don't know. I got out of the hospital last Wednesday and even though I had a great time visiting my sister, it just reminded me how little support I have at home. I have my first session with a trauma therapist tomorrow and I want to be okay. I do but I don't know how. Like I stupidly spent $106 total in a doll (that I'd been wanting for months) and a necklace because of how much I miss my sister even though I just saw her (despite not having a job).

I'm not making any sense, am I? I'm trying so hard to be okay but it's so incredibly difficult.

Since mid-July, I've been having these intense crying episodes where I'm crying super heavily uncontrollably. And it won't stop. It got so bad that I checked myself into a mental hospital. What was it that started? I'd read the Haunting and Hunting Adeline books after the move announcement and it triggered my PTSD from being sexually abused so bad that I haven't been the same since.

I just want to be okay. It's been 3 years since I met my abuser and I just...I don't know. I got out of the hospital last Wednesday and even though I had a great time visiting my sister, it just reminded me how little support I have at home. I have my first session with a trauma therapist tomorrow and I want to be okay. I do but I don't know how. Like I stupidly spent $106 total in a doll (that I'd been wanting for months) and a necklace because of how much I miss my sister even though I just saw her (despite not having a job).

I'm not making any sense, am I? I'm trying so hard to be okay but it's so incredibly difficult.

So I'm an indie author publishing my book on Barnes and Noble Press and Kindle Direct publishing. While the paperback cover fit the guidelines for B&N fine, it didn't for KDP.

And the problem is it originally accepted it as is but when I updated the manuscript by changing one word (page count stayed the same), the cover was no longer accepted. And KDP help didn't couldn't do anything which was super frustrating.

So here’s my question: since the spine text has to be so stupidly small on the KDP cover, could I have the spine text for said KDP paperback be a bit different from the B&N version? So for the B&N, it’d just say “Aftertaste” at the top and Ellie Hart for the bottom, while the KDP would say “The Line Between Us: Aftertaste” at the top, and “a novel by Ellie Hart” on the bottom. Would that be okay that they aren't the exact same on both platforms?

So I'm an indie author publishing my book on Barnes and Noble Press and Kindle Direct publishing. While the paperback cover fit the guidelines for B&N fine, it didn't for KDP.

And the problem is it originally accepted it as is but when I updated the manuscript by changing one word (page count stayed the same), the cover was no longer accepted. And KDP help didn't couldn't do anything which was super frustrating.

So here’s my question: since the spine text has to be so stupidly small on the KDP cover, could I have the spine text for said KDP paperback be a bit different from the B&N version? So for the B&N, it’d just say “Aftertaste” at the top and Ellie Hart for the bottom, while the KDP would say “The Line Between Us: Aftertaste” at the top, and “a novel by Ellie Hart” on the bottom. Would that be okay that they aren't the exact same on both platforms?

I’m probably not going to get any responses but I wanna try. So on the Galatea app, the 7th and final book to Angela and Xavier’s story is locked behind a paywall. And since I don’t really want to spend $69.99 for one book, I was wondering if anyone who has read that final one could tell me what happens in it

I’ve been struggling for a long time to understand the sexual side of the abuse I went through when I dated my ex, and I’m hoping to get some clarity from people who’ve been through similar things.

For some context, there were two instances where he clearly assaulted me (though I didn’t know it was assault during the relationship): the first time, he touched my genitalia while I was completely unconscious.

The second obvious assault happened when I started quietly but audibly crying during sex but couldn’t tell him stop or no. After he finished, he acknowledged that I was crying (but he never stopped as soon as he realized).

(Some more information: he was emotional and psychologically abusive during the entire relationship which made it so I couldn’t feel safe to tell him to stop during the second obvious assault.)

On to my question: there were so many other times during sex when he’d deliberately be too rough and hurt me. I’d tell him that he was hurting me and to stop, and he’d apologize, only to do it again the next time. And this happened again. And again. I’ve been told that this is sexual abuse as he was deliberately hurting me during sex for his own pleasure but I wanted to ask people on here if it was rape/sexual abuse.

I know something happened because it’s been over two years since the breakup and I still have trouble being intimate with myself. Which was never a problem before I dated my abuser.

Is what he did sexual abuse/rape?

I've been paying for Apple Care for my watch but am heavily considering cancelling it to save on money. Has anyone else done this? Will I regret cancelling it?

Edit: I’m currently unemployed and am very limited on money. Hence, my conundrum.

So it’s been two years since I left my abuser and tonight I finally understood the last part of the abuse he put me through. First I came to understand that him touching my genitalia while I was completely unconscious was sexual assault. Then him having sex with me while I was in pain and crying was assault (I couldn’t tell him no or stop because I’d felt unsafe to do so thanks to the emotional abuse which leads me to my next point).

Then I realized that he had been emotionally and psychologically abusing me the entire relationship, including grooming, manipulation, gaslighting, blame-shifting, love bombing, withholding affection as punishment (and more but I don’t want this post too long).

It finalizes with me understanding that the intermittent reinforcement he did wasn’t just emotional but also sexual. Just like with the emotional abuse where he’d be all loving and sweet, disappear for several days, then gaslighting me when I was upset for him disappearing, he also did this when it came to sex. He’d deliberately hurt me during sex, I’d tell him he hurt me, he’d apologize and then do it again.

This happened so often during the relationship but it took me over two years since the breakup to understand it. And even though it’s been two years, I still can’t be intimate with myself. Like outer external is fine but internal? I can’t. And I honestly don’t know how long it’ll be while I’m with a guy again.

Does this get easier? Like will I reach that place where I can feel safe enough to have sex?

I just released my debut indie novel Aftertaste and wanted to share it here. This story has been in my head for a long time and finally seeing it out in the world feels unreal. If you enjoy character driven fiction with emotional tension and darker edges, this one might be for you.

The Amazon paperback is $12.99.
The Barnes and Noble paperback is still showing $12.99 but it is updating to $14.99.
The Kindle ebook is $6.99.
The Barnes and Noble ebook is $7.99.

Amazon: https://a.co/d/01DmKiH2

Barnes and Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/aftertaste-ellie-hart/1149970163?ean=9798256328702

Thank you to anyone who checks it out or supports indie authors. It means a lot.

I just released my debut indie novel and wanted to share it here. The book is called Aftertaste by Ellie Hart. The Amazon paperback is $12.99. The Barnes and Noble paperback is still showing $12.99 but it is updating to $14.99. The Kindle ebook is $6.99 and the Barnes and Noble ebook is $7.99.

Here are the links:

Amazon: https://a.co/d/01DmKiH2
Barnes and Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/aftertaste-ellie-hart/1149970163?ean=9798256328702

Thank you to anyone who checks it out.

I’ve been watching a trend on Threads (and honestly TikTok before that) where people are starting to call everything “sexual assault.” And I don’t mean actual sexual violations. I mean things like:

• spanking a child

• grabbing someone’s arm

• any touch without consent

• any power imbalance

• any physical punishment

It’s gotten to the point where people are saying spanking a child is “indistinguishable from sexual assault.” And I’m sorry, but no. That’s not how categories work.

I’m someone who was spanked as a kid. I was also sexually assaulted as an adult. These are not the same category of harm. They don’t feel the same, they don’t function the same, and they don’t have the same intent. The worst part of being spanked wasn’t “feeling sexualized.” It was hearing my baby brother cry in the other room and feeling scared and ashamed (yes I’ve been spanked as well and it hurt). That’s real harm but it’s not sexual harm.

What frustrates me is that when I point this out, people accuse me of “minimizing.” But I’m not minimizing anything. I’m saying that different harms exist, and we need language that reflects that.

If we start calling every non‑consensual touch “sexual assault,” then by that logic:

• diaper changes are sexual assault

• medical exams are sexual assault

• a parent grabbing a child’s arm to stop them from running into traffic is sexual assault

And when I point this out, people say “that’s not my logic,” even though it is the logical extension of what they’re arguing.

I’m not theorizing from the outside. I’ve lived both experiences. I know what sexual abuse feels like. I know what physical punishment feels like. They are not interchangeable. They are not “indistinguishable.” And flattening them into one category doesn’t help survivors. It erases the differences that matter.

I’m tired of watching people online escalate every harm to the most extreme label because it feels morally satisfying. It’s not trauma‑informed. It’s not legally accurate. And it makes it harder for people to talk about what actually happened to them.

We need to be able to say:

• “This was harmful”

• “This was abusive”

• “This was violent”

• “This was sexual”

without acting like all four words mean the same thing. Because they don’t.