u/Due-Appointment2160

I have these 3 complete written songs, and I wanted to know if going to a studio with a professional engineer would be helpful in making the songs come to life. I like how I sound when I sing them out loud, but when I try to use my cheap mic($30) on BandLab I sound like a dying goat. Is it just my voice? When I sing around my family they tell me my voice is really harmonic. I haven’t gotten any professional training done, I just sing to myself in my free time. What do you guys think?

I cared enough, to loose the facade around you,

But that wasn’t enough.

I cared enough, to ask genuine questions even when I was disconnected from life myself,

But that wasn’t enough.

I cared enough, to make your day easier even if it meant making mine harder,

But that wasn’t enough.

I cared enough, to paint every scenario and choose the option that would benefit you the most,

But that wasn’t enough.

I’m left thinking if my deeds were ever enough for you.

I’m left contemplating if you even wanted my care.

I’m left reflecting on what I could’ve done differently.

I’m left wondering If I ever cared enough.

If I should have cared.

If perhaps my best, isn’t what people want.

If perhaps my, self is a burden to you.

If perhaps my existence was just another fly meant to be shoo’d away.

Do I hold any value in you?

Am I worth anything to you?

If everything I gave you still wasn’t enough, was there anything valuable about what I gave?

How can I make myself something of value to you?

I send this to the void, because who truly cares.

Sometimes it really sucks seeing everyone become friends and get along while you’re the one being ostracized.

As someone with autism/AuDHD, I’ve experienced how easily misunderstandings can happen. The way I communicate, react, express myself, or interact with people can be interpreted in ways I never intended.

What hurts the most, is watching people form connections with each other while you’re left wondering why it seems so much harder for you. You can genuinely try to be kind, helpful, and respectful, but still somehow end up being the person people distance themselves from.

It can make you question yourself a lot. Not because you necessarily want everyone to like you, but because being consistently left out is painful.

Sometimes I just wish people would try to understand me before deciding who they think I am.

Take what they say, burn it to soot

Hear my name in the air, you turn, you ache

You see my face, you see my soul

You don’t see the truth, dancing right in front of ye

Your a fool, who acts insightful, yet can’t see the wolves right in front of you

Pretend to be who you want, pretend to be a good’

Your projection of insecurity, will not fall into the hearts’ of good

I pray for you, and whatever world you are owed

I seen the truth, I respected you, and went on my merry go way

Sometimes people are lost, so I don’t condemn you for your stupidity

Rid me of your world, as I’ve done you

I wish you healthy

I wish you prosperity

I hold no hate for you

I hold only respect for you

People usually say I’m an honest person, but I get misunderstood a whole lot; when I could mean the entire opposite thing. My sister said I usually seem like Im judging people in the pauses between our conversations, when I’m just nodding my head because my mind is blank and I want to seem engaged. Should I be forcing myself to look people in their eyes? I found peace in letting people think whatever they want growing up, but it’s starting to affect me more and more as I age.

Left my workplace after finding out they were spreading blatant lies about me. I found out they would just make up assumptions about me and who I am and run along with it adding more and more to the rumors. I thought they were all inviting, and not judging my every move and thought, and exploiting my naivety. I treated everyone the same way, with kindness. I really struggle with socializing with people, so I’d like some advice to stop caring about this. I can’t get over why they wouldn’t just tap me on my shoulder and ask me if what they were saying was true. I feel like I was painted out as some creep and it sucks .

I try to occupy my mind, but nothing works. I beg, please leave my head. Let me go back to how things were before. Oblivious, of you. It’s like you chained my heart, with Cerberus guarding my tomb. Please please please, just let me forget.

For some reason, I never took notice of the times I would be overstimulated or burnout. I would often write it off as anxiety and my never ending yawning being a sign of depression or insomnia. Though recently I got fired from my job (thankfully; work cliques suck), now 3 weeks jobless. I feel so much happier now. I can actually mask again, when I didn’t even know I lost my ability too. I can actually feel energy when out with friends too, but this might just be the result of no job lol.