u/Due-Hunter-6334

for context im in Australia and im 16 and a girl and in my state the age of consent is 16 as long as the other person Is not a step parent, teacher, religious leader, or coach.

im best friends with and legally dating my boyfriend who is 46 and I know I will get downvoted so much for saying that but I want advice to prove to my mum that this ia a true relationship, not a short one and no inappropriate things are happening at all until marriage. my mum knows him and like she's on the fence like she lets me hang out with him only when she's home and he can drive me places that are a short distance so we dont get to be alone for awhile and she knows were dating and like she said when im 17 we can have the dating discussion again with her but I love him so much like I cant even put it into words hes so kind and funny and cool and respectful and sweet and caring and helpful hes genuinely my dream guy and im going to get married to him one day.

like hes not rude or inappropriate at all and my mum knows that maybe thats why she's not mad but I want to convince her that I should be able to know bc its legal and she cant legally stop it and im not a child anymore I can legally drop out of school and move out if I so wanted to and im the age of consent so im not a child anymore, how to I persuade her? thank youuu pls dont judge :)

for context im a girl and im currently 16.

I was having a shower when I felt the overwhelming feeling of embarrassment like so so so strong, like I literally told her what that man did to me and overall ik it was like beneficial because that sent him to jail but Its so so embarrassing.

for context, when I was 12 till I was almost 14 I was being hurt by a very dangerous man who later got sentenced to like 50 years in prison but hes already in his 50s so its life in prison for him pretty much and he had bad stuff on his phone so that added to it and ik it was good me telling my mom what was happening to me because it led to this evil man being locked up for the rest of his life but I think maybe I might of been content in never telling anyone what was happening, I know that sounds selfish and I didnt like what he was doing to me at all but I feel like id feel more connected to my parents especially my mom, if they never knew.

like it just makes me feel so wrong that my mom knows I was doing things with a much older man for a long time it just feels wrong and gross that she knows that I was literally doing it with a man like inappropriate things, like they never raised me to be embarrassed of that stuff at all but idk like it just feels so wrong her knowing what I was doing, like I don't want her to know that side of me, like idek if she sees me the same anymore like I just want her to see me as her innocent daughter ik that sounds weird but she knows like all the gross stuff I did know and it makes me feel so weird.

like ive never felt the same with my parents since I told them, they still act the same and are very supportive and kind dont get me wrong but I dont feel the same I just feel so embarrassed to this day and I want to just start new, I love my mom so much but idek what to do with myself. like I want to be a normal teenager and be close with my parents and their close with me but I dont feel the same and I feel so bad because they're so sweet and nice to me I feel like I act like a brat and ungrateful when im really grateful.

like my mom knows what type of person I am now and its so embarrassing that she does like she knows exactly what I was doing for years like what the heck its just wrong her knowing this might sound weird but yeah I need advice to be normal.

for context im a girl and im currently 16.

I was having a shower when I felt the overwhelming feeling of embarrassment like so so so strong, like I literally told her what that man did to me and overall ik it was like beneficial because that sent him to jail but Its so so embarrassing.

for context, when I was 12 till I was almost 14 I was being hurt by a very dangerous man who later got sentenced to like 50 years in prison but hes already in his 50s so its life in prison for him pretty much and he had bad stuff on his phone so that added to it and ik it was good me telling my mom what was happening to me because it led to this evil man being locked up for the rest of his life but I think maybe I might of been content in never telling anyone what was happening, I know that sounds selfish and I didnt like what he was doing to me at all but I feel like id feel more connected to my parents especially my mom, if they never knew.

like it just makes me feel so wrong that my mom knows I was doing things with a much older man for a long time it just feels wrong and gross that she knows that I was literally doing it with a man like inappropriate things, like they never raised me to be embarrassed of that stuff at all but idk like it just feels so wrong her knowing what I was doing, like I don't want her to know that side of me, like idek if she sees me the same anymore like I just want her to see me as her innocent daughter ik that sounds weird but she knows like all the gross stuff I did know and it makes me feel so weird.

like ive never felt the same with my parents since I told them, they still act the same and are very supportive and kind dont get me wrong but I dont feel the same I just feel so embarrassed to this day and I want to just start new, I love my mom so much but idek what to do with myself. like I want to be a normal teenager and be close with my parents and their close with me but I dont feel the same and I feel so bad because they're so sweet and nice to me I feel like I act like a brat and ungrateful when im really grateful.

like my mom knows what type of person I am now and its so embarrassing that she does like she knows exactly what I was doing for years like what the heck its just wrong her knowing this might sound weird but yeah I need advice to be normal.

(throw away account because I cant talk about this on my main)

I need Christ centred advice about this not just people disrespecting God thats why im posting it here.

im 16 and a girl and basically for context my dads the pastor so ive been going to this church my whole life im baptist if that adds anything, and ive known the man since like 2019 so I was 9 turning 10. from when he came everyone knew he had just gotten out of jail for explicit images charges (I cant say it properly because reddit will take it down but you know what I mean.) but he found God in jail and everyone trusted him so hes around alot and he like became a family friend, he was the closest with our family out of any of the families at church.

he would come to all my sports games and I do alot of stuff and he would come to my dance recitals and every Sunday he would take my family out for food after church and he would just overall hang out with us alot and hes like 47 no wife no kids (he had a wife but she divorced him years before he went to prison.) and I liked him he was really nice and funny and id mention I wanted a pair of sunglasses for the summer because the sun hurts my eyes and the next time I saw him he had a big bag of sunglasses and my favourite snacks which I thought was pretty cool.

nothing bad happend until I was 12 when we had a church lake outing in the summer and like I still hadn't developed at that point I know thats a weird thing to say but like I was the only girl around my age at church who hadn't hit puberty yet and me him and my mum were talking and I was wearing a 2 piece swim suit and I said like my swimsuit top is gonna slide down and he said im gonna get him in trouble by saying that and idrk what that ment but it made me feel weird but my mom just laughed and told me to go swimming in the lake.

I guess that counts as bad but something really bad happend when I was 13 and we had a 24 hour prayer vigil at my church and we had to sign our names down for different times and we would pray alone in the church for an hour then the next person would come in, and I signed up for 3 am and my mom told me (the man) was gonna drive me to the church bc my dad ha health issues so its kinda hard for him to and my mom had to look after him so we were in the car and he was talking to me and put his hands in my jeans and like yeah.

every Tuesday me and some others at my church volunteer for the homeless and we would drive to pick them up and take them to the soup kitchen and that man would drive his car and my mom would tell me to go help him get the homeless people (none of this is her fault at her she's just really sweet and sees the best in people.) but every time it would be me and him alone in the car he would do weird things to me and it eventually escalated to him fully 'hurting me' (I cant say the actual word bc reddit takes the post down.) and my mom would ask why we would take longer than usual and he would always say because they would make pit stops for the homeless people and idk what she thinks.

I actually didnt even find out he ever went to prison until I was 13 so yeah it kinda clicked for me ig but I haven't told anyone about it because its so embarrassing and its gonna make my parents feel so guilty so idk what to do but yeahhh.

(throw away account because I have people ik irl on my main)

okay so ive known this man since I was 16, im 18 now so dont worry im not a minor, also im a girl.

the majority of the time ive known him we barley spoke, just saying hi and that like surface level conversation to each other, and he would always chat with my dad and he wasn't lie interested in me ig which is good bc I was a minor but what I mean is like I was just a kid to him ig, I turned 18 about 3 months ago and Im currently being trained in a nursery for babies and toddlers at a childcare centre as work experience and him and his wife recently had another child and they drop him off at the nursery every day so I began to see him more often and hes been much more chatty with me than before, like way more conversations that go beyond just hi.

I guess that makes sense because I am looking after his baby, but it feels different now, he asked for my instagram and my phone number and at the start I thought it was just because hes known me for years and im looking after his baby and maybe he wanted to text me to check up on his child or send photos of his child but he began to text me late at night when I was home, he would send me alot of instagram reels and he even sent me selfies of himself at the gym and in his bed.

I began to feel weirded out and I have a boyfriend myself so Im not interested in him at all, and I told my bf about it since the start and he told me the situations weird but maybe because hes old he dosnt realise how this is weird and hes just naive which I can see what he means. but once he called me to his house to look after his baby while he was home, I was confused why he wanted me to babysit if he was home and he told me because he needs to rest before he goes to work, it was weird but I just looked after the baby I guess.

eventually I got a follow request from a blank private account on instagram and when I accepted he told me it was him and he wanted to speak to me more privately and he told me hes recently noticed how beautiful I am and how he has strong feelings for me, he told me he cant act on it as he as a wife but he told me if he wasn't married he would totally ask me out, this made me feel really weird and uncomfortable and I showed my bf and he thinks its crazy and he said I should tell his wife and my dad since my dads friends with him and I want to say somthing I just feel really really bad for his wife because she's been so kind to me, she's a really sweet lady and idk what my dad will say but yeah.

(throw away account because I cant talk about this on my main)

im 16 and a girl and basically for context my dads the pastor so ive been going to this church my whole life im baptist if that adds anything, and ive known the man since like 2019 so I was 9 turning 10. from when he came everyone knew he had just gotten out of jail for explicit images charges (I cant say it properly because reddit will take it down but you know what I mean.) but he found God in jail and everyone trusted him so hes around alot and he like became a family friend, he was the closest with our family out of any of the families at church.

he would come to all my sports games and I do alot of stuff and he would come to my dance recitals and every Sunday he would take my family out for food after church and he would just overall hang out with us alot and hes like 47 no wife no kids (he had a wife but she divorced him years before he went to prison.) and I liked him he was really nice and funny and id mention I wanted a pair of sunglasses for the summer because the sun hurts my eyes and the next time I saw him he had a big bag of sunglasses and my favourite snacks which I thought was pretty cool.

nothing bad happend until I was 12 when we had a church lake outing in the summer and like I still hadn't developed at that point I know thats a weird thing to say but like I was the only girl around my age at church who hadn't hit puberty yet and me him and my mum were talking and I was wearing a 2 piece swim suit and I said like my swimsuit top is gonna slide down and he said im gonna get him in trouble by saying that and idrk what that ment but it made me feel weird but my mom just laughed and told me to go swimming in the lake.

I guess that counts as bad but something really bad happend when I was 13 and we had a 24 hour prayer vigil at my church and we had to sign our names down for different times and we would pray alone in the church for an hour then the next person would come in, and I signed up for 3 am and my mom told me (the man) was gonna drive me to the church bc my dad ha health issues so its kinda hard for him to and my mom had to look after him so we were in the car and he was talking to me and put his hands in my jeans and like yeah.

every Tuesday me and some others at my church volunteer for the homeless and we would drive to pick them up and take them to the soup kitchen and that man would drive his car and my mom would tell me to go help him get the homeless people (none of this is her fault at her she's just really sweet and sees the best in people.) but every time it would be me and him alone in the car he would do weird things to me and it eventually escalated to him fully 'hurting me' (I cant say the actual word bc reddit takes the post down.) and my mom would ask why we would take longer than usual and he would always say because they would make pit stops for the homeless people and idk what she thinks.

I actually didnt even find out he ever went to prison until I was 13 so yeah it kinda clicked for me ig but I haven't told anyone about it because its so embarrassing and its gonna make my parents feel so guilty so idk what to do but yeahhh.