u/Dull_asallways

AITA: for not trusting my husband at night.
So I 29F (not a native English speaker) am married to my husband 33M. He is a lovely husband but at night he is just a menace.

Every time he wakes up he is disoriented. He is panicking, grabbing things,walking in to walls, he talks in his sleep, he fights in his sleep… he often wakes up in the middle of the night, thinking it is time to wake up, gets dressed and start eating before realising it is in fact the middle of the night. He does this at least once a week. I have told him Time and time again to first look at his watch (that he is wearing!) before getting up.

It has come to a point where every time he moves I wake up to make sure he isn’t getting up in the middle of the night. So if I am not awoken by his talking or yelling I now wake up by him just moving.

And that is not all. There were two occasions where I truly believed there was someone in the house. I tried to wake him, but because of his ‘state’ in which he wakes up it was up to me to get up and look.

This morning his alarm on his phone (like every day) was going off and instead of turning it down, I woke up to him wrestling the digital clock (that projects the time on the ceiling) instead of his phone. So again I had to help him.

It is just starting to feel unsafe. We are thinking about having children but how do I ever trust him at night? I am a nurse so i work shifts. I already am freaking out about leaving him at night with our dogs in the house. I just fear there is nothing I can do. When we talk about it he says: when it is serious I will be adequate. Like sure dude.

So my husband has 0 self awareness, he could drop something and I would immediately ask: what did you drop? And he would answer with: I don’t know? I didn’t make a sound or the usual ‘nothing’.

He has this ‘habit’ with a lot of things: he makes a sound or does something, which I ask about and he always says he doesn’t have a clue about the thing or the noise that he just made.

Or he states the obvious:
My opinion is that he drives recklessly, this has been an issue since the beginning of our relationship and it is a lot better now than it was at the beginning. But today he was swerving lanes, passing cars like he was in the fast and furious movies. At one point I angrily asked him “what are you doing man??” To which he answered “I’m driving?” This can drive me absolutely insane. My blood starts boiling and I just know it is better to just shut up in the meantime.

The thing is: what is the behaviour he is doing? Is he unaware of himself or is he dismissive? How do I handle it? What do I do?
English is not my first language so my apologies for spelling mistakes.

TL;DR long story very short: my husband was driving like a madman and when I asked what he was doing he answered me by saying “driving”.