u/Early_Brick_1522

I found an edgeSmith. I've been looking for one for as long as I can remember on This server. I got him knocked out, I dragged him to my gibbet. I could interact with the gibbet. So I broke it and put down a wheel. I couldn't interact with the wheel. So I broke it and put down the next tier of wheel. No dice.

So I released my bindings and I could interact with the wheel. I put the gibbet back up and I could interact with it. Yay.

I rebound the thrall and I couldn't interact with the gibbet or the wheels. I dropped the thrall and asked my friend to try. He logged on. He could not even see the thrall. But he could interact with it once I helped guide him. On my screen. The thrall was right there, on his screen. His binding just took off into Infinity towards the North.

He could not interact with the wheel either or the gibbet.

We stood there. Scratching our heads and all of a sudden his binding released and that was it. The thrall I had been looking for is my white whale vanished from the game.

I'm very sad.

It's not a huge deal and I've had two conversations with him about it and he's starting to lighten up but I'm still just frustrated and want to share

First off, we have inflated attributes because of some stuff that happened within the game session, I think session 8 and we're on about session 25.

My sorcerer has 33 charisma permanently. Yes, that's huge. I understand that but within the context of the game it's what happened. This was the DM's decision because he wanted to throw some stronger stuff at us.

Okay so with tOkay so with that out of the way I play a face character. I naturally have like able to 22 to diplomacy and similar to bluff. With that, I should be able to pretty much navigate any face situation. I don't abuse it, I use it to talk my way into places I shouldn't be, I use it to get extra rewards if possible, I use it to talk down enemies if I can but I accept when I can't because sometimes somebody's just too hostile.

Here's my problem, the DM has literally everyone roll against me and somehow they always win. If I'm trying to use diplomacy with a base level 1 guard and my total is 38 on diplomacy. They see right through it and he just says nope and argues in character and I'm not going to get to do what I'm asking to do. Same thing. When I tried a bluff. I also use minor illusion and the disguise to make myself look more like the person I'm talking to. Not asking for a buff but for a role play reason it would make them more likely to talk to me.

What finally caused me to bring it up with the DM was I rolled a bluff that I lost a pass that was supposed to get us into a certain area. It wasn't even high security. It was just a noble person's party that we were supposed to go to as characters. He had forgotten to give us the story hook with these invitations and so I forged and was going to make my way in. I rolled a 42 on bluff. That means I rolled a natural 20, which should be an automatic success on skills in his games, plus my 22. A 42. And the servant at the door stood there and told me no because he supposedly rolled a 20. He didn't show us. " Nope, I don't know who you are. I'm not letting your ass in. This is obviously a forgery get out of here before I call the guards" keep in mind I asked if this was a magical servant or if he had any special knowledge and he said no. He just let the dice decide.

At that point I asked to pause the game and asked if I could just reroll into a new character and he asked why. I told him that he consistently invalidates what I built my character to do. I pointed out I had not even abused anything. And nine times out of 10. I wasn't even lying when I used diplomacy because he had given me an earring that gave me a free zone of Truth as a constant effect when I wore it. Which means I could consistently ensure everybody knew I was telling the truth as I understood it.

Everything was built not only to be a sorcerer who blasted things but to be the face of the party since no one else wanted that. And when he consistently somehow had even the lowest level peasant outroll my high diplomacy to turn us down when we wanted to buy supplies. Because that that peasant wanted to keep the supplies themselves, it made my character a completely pointless. I could understand that he uses critical fail, critical success for skills and he wants me to roll because he wants to see if I fuck it up. Fair. I like that rule and I don't mind it.

But I know damn well he's not rolling a 20 on every encounter, and rolling against such a high bluff and diplomacy is just kind of insulting after a while. If it were just the nobles or the king. And I'm making some outlandish claim where I'm the king's long-lost son or the treasury is actually mine. I can understand completely disbelieving me. But trying to get into a party that's a goddamn plot. Point is not a reason to roll against me. Me trying to get a good deal on supplies or a magic weapon is not a reason to just shut me down. An example of that is I wanted to buy a magic sword for a teammate as a surprise and it was 2000 gold coins. I tried to use appraise and then diplomacy, citing how we had already helped this merchant and the rest of the town. Nope, because I asked the price went up to $3,000. He rolled his dice and said that the guy rolled so much higher than me that the merchant was insulted. I asked for a discount and that the sword was already discounted.

Even the rest of the table was like what the fuck at that point and another player asked if he was pissed off at me. He wasn't. He was just having a good time. He does it to the other players too so it's not like he's targeting me.

So it all comes to a head in the second to last session. At the very end, I was able to finally convince this mercenary leader to let me lead a small contingent of about six middle level mercenaries to help them with their goal. At the end of the session he had finally agreed and gave me five. That would follow me if I would lead them through these ruins we were going to. I agreed. My logic being that five well trained NPC fighters would be helpful in this high difficulty area. We were going to go into. Session ends, a week later we pick it up.

I remind him about the five mercenaries and he suddenly goes. Nope, they have their own goals and they take off leaving you guys behind. I brought up the fact that no that's not what we talked about and he says well. This is what they do. Even the rest of the table was shocked and asked why since he had agreed and everybody had the notes written down that they were going to be following me. He argued that he never actually said that. He just said the leader agreed that they would come along but not for how long. It was obvious he had a plot hook ready for me where I would chase him down and discover something. But for the first time I said nope. If they want to go they can go. Let's just continue on everybody.

He then revealed that he had been working on a plot for 4 days for me to chase down about why the NPCs took off and he did it specifically for me because I set up the side quest through just playing the game. I said. Well that's too bad but I don't know what you want me to do anymore and obviously my skills are useless and taking notes doesn't make a difference. So nope. I'm just going to go along with the group.

For the rest of that session he would ask for diplomacy checks and I would just look at him. I participated with the group and I blew things up with fireballs and scorching rays but when it came time to do diplomacy I just sat it out. At the end of the session. He asked me why and I said " well, if my diplomacy in my bluff and my appraise and all that is useless in every situation, why am I even going to try anymore? Can I roll a new character now?" He looked like his feelings were heard and we have a session planned in 2 weeks and we'll see how it goes.

Mostly this is a rant because I was very clear on the type of character I wanted to play, basically a a cash down nobleman sourcerer who had a lot of face skills and the will to use them. He said okay. Okay. We're level 10 and I can count on one hand. How many times my skills have succeeded.

Edit: I'm well aware that in standard rules you can't critically fumble or critically succeed on a skill roll. That's a Homebrew rule that he has that we all play along with.

Miss precious is already level 5 and having a good time helping me kill gray ones

I hired Thut'Mat the Sorcerer from my tavern, which was nice, I needed a Sorcerer

I moved my main base up hill about a 30 second run away. I left my town in place.

I want Thut'Mat the Sorcerer to live at the main base. I lead her up there. She disappears and reappears back in town..

I'm about to raze my own town TO THE GROUND to get her to stop doing that.

Why is she doing that? I have her follow. Place her as a guard. Stick her on her work bench. She leaves. All doors are disabled for thralls.

Y'all gonna make me lose my mind

Up in here, up in here

Thut'Mat, you’re leaving me behind

Up in here, up in here

I set the thrall to "Stand and Guard"

Why you making this so damn hard?

I’m logging off, I’m done, I’m scarred!

Up in here, up in here!

Get back on the perch, Thut'Mat! Just stay on the damn perch!

I (46m) met my girlfriend of 2 months, Jennifer (45f) online.

My profile made it clear that I was a single father of two young children. When we first met up for our first date part of the discussion was the fact that I am a full-time and invested father. I'm not looking for a mother for my children, I'm looking for a partner for myself. But with that said I was up front about the fact that I do have my children the majority of the time. I explained that I would always make time for my partner but I had to be a little more structured to do so.

I have a reasonable working co-parenting situation but I do have to work around my ex to ensure that things are smooth. Ultimately my children come first.

With all that said, I laid it all out on the table. She stated that she wasn't comfortable around children because she had never been around them and wasn't a mother but we seemed like such a good fit we decided to see how it works out.

Up until last Saturday It had worked out very well. We had plenty of time to see each other, we texted all the time, she respected that I have obligations, I respected that she needed time with me which I provided because I wanted to be there too. Being with her was smooth, easy, and we share a surprising amount in common. I was never anything but transparent when it came to my kids.

Last week we tried to spend time together towards the end of the week and it fell through because of some timing on her side. I tried to make plans for the next day but due to some time in on her side and mine it would only be an hour. For me a micro date for an hour, like a drink, or dinner would have been nice. It would have been nice to see her since I haven't seen her for a week. That wasn't good enough for her so she skipped it completely. Then that Saturday we were supposed to meet up but she didn't like the vibe so she cancelled last minute.

Later that night I got a " What are we text" And I explained it as far as I was concerned we were boyfriend and girlfriend and I was looking forward to seeing her soon. She then challenged me to prove that I was going to make room for her.

So I called her. We had a 2-hour conversation about expectations in the relationship and how she saw things. I explained to my side, I listened to her. We both stayed respectful, we were both open to each other's sides, and I thought we found a good resolution. We were going to see each other Monday

Monday rolls around and the plan was for me to go over to her house for dinner. She said that she had early work the next day so I assumed going home at 9:00 p.m. or 9:30 wouldn't have been a big deal. My plan was to pick up the kids afterwards from their mom's house but not with a specific timer.

This triggered another hour-long conversation. Basically she said that it was unhealthy and codependent for me to be with my kids as much as I am. She said that my ex was abusing me by basically just being a babysitter. She said that most people would have a hard time dating me because I want to be around my kids.

I explained that she doesn't know a lot about my ex and how I have to navigate basically a minefield. On top of that If I ask for time to go out without the kids I also reciprocate that time for my ex when she wants to go without with the kids. That it's a very respectful situation that gives the lowest impact to two young kids who have to navigate divorced parents. I explained that I'm in a good position in my life, that I don't need somebody to complete me, but I want to be with her. That we meet in the middle on so many things and I don't understand why all of a sudden it's a problem.

On her side of it she's never been around kids. It's not that she dislikes them she's just uncomfortable around them. She basically laid it on the table that she needs me to give her time that I may not have available. Even if she meets the kids she's not going to be around them that much because of her own comfort levels. She also has no plans to move in together at any point in the future because she does not want to live in a home with children. She's never asked for me to not be with my children, she says that I'm an excellent dad and she admires that about me but she still has her own needs. It's understandable.

Now I want to reiterate that this was a respectful conversation where we were laying out our boundaries without attacking one another. I respect that she has a boundaries with kids but I made a point that she knew what she was walking into, that I'm a single dad who is engaged with my children and that I enjoy it and it's a huge part of me.

After the conversation we had a nice time together. We said we'd figure it out and she said she tried to be more accepting of the kids

But when I went home and all through today I was thinking about the fact that we've only been together two months. It's not like we're navigating friction that comes from not liking the same food or having a different taste and entertainment. My children are a fundamental part of my life And I need a partner to understand that she's going to integrate into that life if she wants to be with me. I hold no expectations of that person being a parent or anything but bringing a cool friend or cool aunt energy.

As much as I care for Jennifer, for as much as we have in common, as many things as we agree on, and the physical and emotional attraction, what it comes down to is I have a fundamental boundary that will not change, ever. And I feel it's unfair to her for her to have to change her view of the world, her view of children, and I have to change herself in a way that she may not want to or be comfortable with. And it's unfair to me to hold someone to those expectations that I'm not going to choose them over my children. Ever.

I think this is a fundamental incompatibility that we're not going to be able to overcome. And that sucks because everything else matches so well. We're at a point in our lives where we're old enough to know what we want, we want to take it slow, we have a wonderful time together. I get along with all of her friends and she gets along with mine. It's just so good

But I just don't think she's ever going to hit the point where she accepts my kids and I think that's a deal breaker.

Do I continue to wait it out? Do I accept that this is fundamentally not going to work and and our relationship now? I'm just stuck. I've been in so many bad relationships, so many unhealthy, so many physically and mentally abusive relationships that being in a healthy relationship is something that's hard to walk away from. And yes she is healthy with her boundaries because she's always communicated them respectfully. That's the whole thing even with a friction point like this she still respectful just like I am.

Edit: I'm going to end it. It gave me a lot to think about. I decided to write a list of what I am actually looking for. It is flexible but it's also what I need.

1. They must understand that my kids are an inherent and important part of my life.

2. The kids are non-negotiable. I'm with them because I want to be.

3. My partner must understand she needs to integrate into our life just like we will integrate into hers.

4. They must have children or have been around children and enjoy the time. Fear of children or being uncomfortable is a no go.

5a. I would prefer a woman who likes children. I will not be having more children.

5b. I would prefer a single mother with children around my girls age

6. I'm not looking for a stepmom from my partner. I will parent the kids, but she can bring the cool aunt energy. She doesn't need to have that stress. However she can guide my kids.

7. The understanding that there will be times of famine when it comes to time alone together, but that phone calls and short face to face bonding is just as important as long dates.

8. They need to have their own life to live. I want to integrate, I don't want codependency.

9. We need a future that we don't have to negotiate over. We don't have to agree on everything, but we need to be in line with goals and expectations. I own a large home with no mortgage and no plans to move. My ex is a 5 minute walk away and that's great for my kids.

Can we please have pick up toggled off in combat? I'm trying to tell my employee to go meet with a skeleton that's currently battling toward me while I conference call with this giant spider and instead my guy picks up apparently infinite sticks and stones laying invisible on the ground.

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Over and over, I'll move and adjust, nope. More sticks. More stones. No management.

You can find them in the wild, they play instruments, give them tavern themes, or adventure themes. Make them performers. That way my tavern doesn't just have dancers dancing to either silence or ambient music that only I should be able to hear. Thanks.

Edit: PS5 here, mods won't help 😟🤮

I am super over all of my crafters taking up all the seats that could be better used for NPCs showing up. I've even locked my crafters in their specific crafting areas by disabling thralls being able to open the doors.

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It doesn't matter. I've seen them phase through the doors to go eat soup next to the bar.

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I have 28 chairs in my tavern and it seems every one of my thralls spend 100% of their time in there

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I'm at the point where I want to spend real money on a pillory to punish my worker thralls.

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I know mechanically they still apply to their benches. But get your fucking ass back to work.

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I didn't save you from a cage or give you brain damage and torture you into compliance So you can sit your lazy ass in my tavern and eat soup from an empty bowl.

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It would be nice if there was a whip item that you could craft and whip your thralls so they would go back to work and stay there for a period of time.

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As a side note I found out you that you can knock out unnamed uninteractable NPCs that show up in the bar. You just have to put them on a binding right away and drag them to your wheel. Even if they technically despawn if you watch your binding it just extends into Infinity but as long as they are on there you can add them to the wheel. I've gotten some threes by just knocking out random people. And it's better than just murdering the whole bar to make a new space for more NPCs

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Anyway I really like living settlements because I like the fact that NPCs wander around and make my little village look more alive, it would just be nice if they spent more time working. It would also be nice if you could set up points for guards to walk between.

Not a huge deal. My clanmate noticed that a couple of our workstations were cleaned out and thought I had organized. That sounded off because I don't organize so I checked the server log and saw somebody had basically scooped everything, thousands of items from building materials, to die, to weapons we had stashed in random spots.

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We play on some random private server, we lock all of our chests, and there's obvious rules that you don't steal. It's also PVE. Additionally it's not like our base is super hidden, but We are Siptah And I built up in the Northern redwoods in a random spot up in a trio of trees. Like it's not something you would normally stumble across unless you were really just running around the redwoods for a while.

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It wasn't a huge loss ultimately but it did irritate us so I messaged the guy and asked him why he stole.

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He was actually apologetic, said he didn't know the rules of the server, but he was fairly new to the game, and thought if it was unlocked he could take things. I explained that it was untrue and theft is theft.

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And then to my absolute surprise he said he'd bring our stuff back, I took that with a grain of salt until he showed a screenshot of him back at our base and asked me to come back.

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And then he returned everything. He couldn't remember each item he took so he brought extra things from his own stash to make up for it.

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My friend and I were shocked he actually came through. We ended up making a really nice care package for him full of legendary weapons and armor, high tier food, and a thousand of each tier three building supply.

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Just completely unexpected because normally thieves are a little pricks and if you message them they just talk crap back.

I'm on Siptah and built my purge base in this tiny cave next to the serpent dungeon. It's been a good spot for purges because they have one point of entry they head towards and can't get through any of the walls. Every Purge has been successful.

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The last purge was the best. Because the camp built about 10 foundations away from my front door. So it was just a chaotic battle right on my front step.

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I didn't know they could build that close and it was a lot of fun and I hope it happens again.

1500 hours in this game and I still don't understand why we have to have a giant 3D map for teleporting. It would be really nice if there was an alternative map room that was just a map on the wall and you would select from there. I mean it's cool but having to make so much space for it is always kind of frustrating.

Edit: I am aware of transpository stones/teleporters. We have a few down. I don't like to put too many down because of the clutter of the floating stones and I don't want to bother the server owner by having spots all over the place.

I've been thinking about it. I very much enjoy archery and I've played an archer on nearly every playthrough and I think at this point I think it's time to discuss arrows and archery.

The weight of the arrows is crazy. The damage of the bows isn't nearly as strong as a good melee weapon.

I can take a good melee weapon and swing forever for 5 lb. With a bow I'll do less damage which means more shots which means more arrows and each stack of arrows weighs 10 lb on top of the weight of the bow.

I think it would be better to either make arrows weightless, change their weight to 0.10 instead of 10 lb per stack, or simply eliminate the need for a stack of arrows and instead let us craft an expensive arrow that we attach to the bow and we just have infinite of that version.

To balance it out poison gas arrows can still be stacked but even those are heavy.

I don't need anecdotal responses about how you can dominate the game with a bow and arrow. Yes, I know. I do it all the time It's my favorite playstyle. I understand that range is a big advantage but at the same time we have to carry far more weight, and do less damage for that range.

Just my two cents

Edit: I'm a console player. No mods, sadly

My friend and I decided to go into hard mode because we beat normal mode it was simple blah blah blah.

One that we've noticed is that the enemies, as in the general mobs are challenging because of the amount of health and damage. It's not bad. But it's a significant difference. He's died more than he died in the previous game

The weird part though is that the bosses don't seem any more difficult. We are done with the scared queen and we're heading into the S.A.H.A.R fight and it's been smooth sailing on every single boss.

Does anybody agree that hard mode is oddly balanced where the general mobs are actually harder than the bosses?