u/EducationalGrade9702

I recently went on a first date with a woman. We had been talking for a while beforehand and she knew that I had never had sex before.

The date itself was nice and we spent a lot of time talking. Later we ended up lying in bed together and started kissing. I was enjoying the kissing, but I wasn't expecting it to turn into sex.

Pretty much immediately after we started kissing, she took things further and started undressing me and initiating sex. She didn't stop to ask me if I wanted to go further or if I was comfortable with it.

I was honestly caught off guard. I didn't stop her and I went along with what was happening, but looking back, I don't think I was actually ready for sex in that moment. It felt more like I let it happen because everything moved so quickly and I didn't really know how to react.

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I’m 22 (lesbian) and somehow ended up sleeping with a 40 year old Woman.

I genuinely still can’t process what happened because I did Not expect this night to go the way it did.

We had known each other online for a while, but this was our first time actually meeting in person. I was insanely nervous beforehand and honestly wasn’t even sure if we would kiss. She had previously talked about us more in terms of friendship, so sex wasn’t even remotely part of my expectations.

She lives pretty far away, so getting to her already felt like some random side quest 😭 She’s an artist, and when I got there she showed me a bunch of her paintings and talked about her art. She also cooked for me, so we ate together, had some drinks, talked for hours, and she smoked a LOT of weed throughout the day.

The funny thing is that I didn’t even feel like she was obviously flirting with me. During the afternoon she was pretty relaxed and talkative, but later in the evening she became quieter and more serious. At some points I genuinely thought, “Yeah, there’s definitely not even going to be a kiss tonight.”

We ended up lying in bed together. She started massaging my hands, which I initially didn’t think much of. Then she put her leg over mine and we gradually got closer. At some point we turned toward each other, looked at each other for a moment and kissed.

And then… things escalated.

We ended up having sex.

That was genuinely the LAST thing I expected when I traveled there. I had mentally prepared myself for an awkward first meeting or maybe a kiss if things went really well. Instead I woke up the next morning thinking, “Wait… did that actually happen?”

We cuddled afterward, and when I left the next morning she kissed me on the mouth twice to say goodbye. Later she even told me she had been trying to figure out how to make a move on me, which made the whole thing even funnier because meanwhile I had been sitting there convinced she wasn’t interested 😅

I’m 22 (lesbian) and somehow ended up sleeping with a 40 year old Woman.

I genuinely still can’t process what happened because I did Not expect this night to go the way it did.

We had known each other online for a while, but this was our first time actually meeting in person. I was insanely nervous beforehand and honestly wasn’t even sure if we would kiss. She had previously talked about us more in terms of friendship, so sex wasn’t even remotely part of my expectations.

She lives pretty far away, so getting to her already felt like some random side quest 😭 She’s an artist, and when I got there she showed me a bunch of her paintings and talked about her art. She also cooked for me, so we ate together, had some drinks, talked for hours, and she smoked a LOT of weed throughout the day.

The funny thing is that I didn’t even feel like she was obviously flirting with me. During the afternoon she was pretty relaxed and talkative, but later in the evening she became quieter and more serious. At some points I genuinely thought, “Yeah, there’s definitely not even going to be a kiss tonight.”

We ended up lying in bed together. She started massaging my hands, which I initially didn’t think much of. Then she put her leg over mine and we gradually got closer. At some point we turned toward each other, looked at each other for a moment and kissed.

And then… things escalated.

We ended up having sex.

That was genuinely the LAST thing I expected when I traveled there. I had mentally prepared myself for an awkward first meeting or maybe a kiss if things went really well. Instead I woke up the next morning thinking, “Wait… did that actually happen?”

We cuddled afterward, and when I left the next morning she kissed me on the mouth twice to say goodbye. Later she even told me she had been trying to figure out how to make a move on me, which made the whole thing even funnier because meanwhile I had been sitting there convinced she wasn’t interested 😅

Ich kann irgendwie immer noch nicht richtig verarbeiten, was passiert ist, weil ich überhaupt nicht damit gerechnet hatte, dass dieser Abend so verlaufen würde.

Ich bin 22 (w) und sie ist 40 (w). Wir kannten uns schon eine Weile online, aber das war das erste Mal, dass wir uns tatsächlich persönlich getroffen haben. Ich war vorher unfassbar nervös und ehrlich gesagt nicht einmal sicher, ob wir uns überhaupt küssen würden. Sie hatte vorher eher davon gesprochen, dass zwischen uns etwas Freundschaftliches entstehen könnte, deshalb hatte ich Sex wirklich überhaupt nicht erwartet.

Sie wohnt etwas weiter weg, also hat sich allein die Anreise zu ihr schon wie irgendeine zufällige Sidequest angefühlt 😭 Sie ist Künstlerin, und als ich angekommen bin, hat sie mir eine Menge ihrer Bilder gezeigt und von ihrer Kunst erzählt. Sie hat außerdem für mich gekocht, also haben wir zusammen gegessen, etwas getrunken, stundenlang geredet und sie hat über den Tag verteilt sehr viel Gras geraucht.

Das Lustige daran ist, dass ich nicht einmal das Gefühl hatte, dass sie besonders offensichtlich mit mir flirtet. Nachmittags war sie ziemlich entspannt und gesprächig, aber später am Abend wurde sie ruhiger und ernster. Zwischendurch dachte ich wirklich: „Ja, heute wird es definitiv nicht mal einen Kuss geben.“

Irgendwann lagen wir zusammen im Bett. Sie fing an, meine Hände zu massieren, wobei ich mir zunächst überhaupt nichts gedacht habe. Dann legte sie ihr Bein über meins und nach und nach kamen wir uns immer näher. Irgendwann drehten wir uns zueinander, sahen uns einen Moment lang an und küssten uns.

Und dann … entwickelte sich das Ganze ziemlich schnell weiter.

Wir hatten schließlich Sex.

Das war wirklich das ALLERLETZTE, womit ich gerechnet hatte, als ich zu ihr gefahren bin. Mental hatte ich mich eher auf ein möglicherweise etwas awkwardes erstes Treffen eingestellt – oder vielleicht auf einen Kuss, wenn es richtig gut laufen würde. Stattdessen bin ich am nächsten Morgen aufgewacht und dachte nur: „Warte mal … ist das gerade wirklich passiert?“

Danach haben wir noch gekuschelt, und als ich am nächsten Morgen gegangen bin, hat sie mich zum Abschied zweimal auf den Mund geküsst. Später hat sie mir sogar erzählt, dass sie die ganze Zeit überlegt hatte, wie sie bei mir den ersten Schritt machen könnte. Das machte die ganze Sache noch lustiger, weil ich währenddessen da saß und fest davon überzeugt war, dass sie überhaupt kein Interesse an mir hätte. 😅

I genuinely still can’t process what happened because I did Not expect this night to go the way it did.

I’m 22F and she’s 40F. We had known each other online for a while, but this was our first time actually meeting in person. I was insanely nervous beforehand and honestly wasn’t even sure if we would kiss. She had previously talked about us more in terms of friendship, so sex wasn’t even remotely part of my expectations.

She lives pretty far away, so getting to her already felt like some random side quest 😭 She’s an artist, and when I got there she showed me a bunch of her paintings and talked about her art. She also cooked for me, so we ate together, had some drinks, talked for hours, and she smoked a LOT of weed throughout the day.

The funny thing is that I didn’t even feel like she was obviously flirting with me. During the afternoon she was pretty relaxed and talkative, but later in the evening she became quieter and more serious. At some points I genuinely thought, “Yeah, there’s definitely not even going to be a kiss tonight.”

We ended up lying in bed together. She started massaging my hands, which I initially didn’t think much of. Then she put her leg over mine and we gradually got closer. At some point we turned toward each other, looked at each other for a moment and kissed.

And then… things escalated.

We ended up having sex.

That was genuinely the LAST thing I expected when I traveled there. I had mentally prepared myself for an awkward first meeting or maybe a kiss if things went really well. Instead I woke up the next morning thinking, “Wait… did that actually happen?”

We cuddled afterward, and when I left the next morning she kissed me on the mouth twice to say goodbye. Later she even told me she had been trying to figure out how to make a move on me, which made the whole thing even funnier because meanwhile I had been sitting there convinced she wasn’t interested 😅

​

Still thinking about last night.

I almost didn’t even go. I was already dressed and ready and still sitting on my bed thinking maybe I should stay home because I had zero energy and wasn’t even excited anymore.

but  I went anyway.

got there, got a beer, sat by the foosball table for a while because I didn’t know where to stand and just watched people play.

After a bit this girl started talking to me. She was american and really pretty. Only spoke english though 

I’m from germany and my english is usually okay but the second i get nervous i feel like i suddenly forget words I’ve known forever. Before it get akward with the conversation I danced in the club a little bit 💀

At some point though i was over it. not in a bad mood, just tired. like that point in the night where your feet hurt and your social battery is dead and you start thinking about your train home.

I almost left.

So I  sat down by the stairs for a minute before leaving because i needed a break first.

and then a another  girl suddenly came over and was like ,,can i sit here?

so she sat next to me.

and we just talked.

Idk how long honestly. It felt like the club got quieter all of a sudden even though music was still playing and people were still around.

and I remember i kept thinking she was cute and also going back and forth in my head like should I ask to kiss her ? 

Then there was a little quiet moment between us and I just asked if I  could kiss her.

and she said yes.

So we kissed.

And i swear it felt so random and surreal because maybe an hour before i was ready to go home thinking the night was basically over 😭

I need brutal honest opinions because my brain is overanalyzing this rejection 😭

I went on a date with this girl, we had good chemistry (or at least I thought so) hand holding, kissing, flowers, compliments like calling me sexy, planning a second date, lots of texting for weeks.

Then suddenly she sent me this today

Hey, I think I should be honest now. I really needed some time to be sure. But I don’t feel anything. I’m sorry. And for whatever we might have started, I don’t want anything less. I want either fireworks, or nothing at all. I’m cancelling our meeting for Thursday. I’m really sorry, believe me. I would have also liked to simply find a new friend. But after the kiss, I guess that’s off the table. Hopefully you find someone with fireworks.

This confused me so much because before that she seemed genuinely interested.