Could my daughter be autistic? Please help me understand her better
My daughter turned 2 last month and recently had her 2 year developmental review with her health visitor. We are now waiting for a full assessment in the coming months. During the review, the health visitor said autism is a possibility, but she couldn’t make a diagnosis at this stage.
I’m hoping to hear from parents of autistic children. Does any of what I will describe about her, sound familiar or remind you of your own child at this age? I’d really appreciate hearing about your experiences.
She is the happiest little girl. She absolutely loves music and dancing, and when her favourite songs come on, she closes her eyes, spins and dances. She loves playing with me and her dad, especially games like hide-and-seek, peekaboo and our little routines. She looks at us to see if we’ll clap or praise her when she does something she’s proud of, and she gets even more excited when we join in. She is very affectionate with us, comes running for cuddles when I call her, and reaches for me when she needs comfort.
She understands far more than she can say. She understands many words and routines in 2 languages, and recognises songs from just hearing the introduction, or can anticipate what songs or programs come next. She remembers games we played months ago, and learns new activities very quickly. She has an incredible memory and pays close attention to details that often surprise us. One of her favourite ways to play is by sorting and organising. She quickly groups animals with their matching animals, colours with colours, and shapes with shapes. She notices even small differences between toys. If I introduce 5 sets of ducks today, and tomorrow I give her another 5 sets. She doesn’t mix the new ones with the old ones, regardless of how similar they are in shades. If one toy is in the wrong group she immediately spots it and moves it back. She enjoys categorising objects, stacking matching cards together, organising books, rings and other toys, and she seems to naturally look for patterns.
However, she is not yet using any words. Although she communicates her needs by looking between me and what she wants, bringing me objects, making different sounds and vocalisations, and using facial expressions, she rarely uses gestures such as waving, pointing, or nodding yes and no. She doesn’t understand the concept of pretend-play and seems rigid in the way she plays with toys. She is also obsessed with lining up objects even her bottle and plate or her shampoos when we are taking a bath.
She has also been delayed in several milestones throughout her development. She sat, crawled and walked later than expected, and many skills seem to come months later.
It’s difficult for us to know whether she is simply developing more slowly or whether there is an underlying developmental condition, and that’s why we have sought help from now. For now, my goal is to start understanding how my daughter experiences the world so I can adapt to her needs, support her in the best way possible, and make our home and routines work for her, even before we have any official answers.
Thank you to anyone willing to share their experience. ❤️