u/Famous-Notice-4183

please i’m begging for anyone to dm me so i can just rant

my life fucking sucks. some of this this is a bit tmi but honestly i do not give a fuck.
in the past 3 months alone:

- i lost about 90% of my friends (my fault because i ghosted them)

- my mother died and came back to life. twice.

- she briefly went psychotic.

- she was also homeless at that point so that’s nice.

- i became addicted to codeine cause “well at least i’m not on oxys/ benzos anymore”.

- went into psychosis and got referred to an eip, of whom are now ignoring me.

- my mother is no longer homeless, yayy!! she’s just living in a crack den. yayy..?

- accidental threesome. i say accidental because i was not conscious for the majority of it.

- i’m now on antibiotics because of an infection i caught from said threesome.

- got jumped, pretty sure i’m brain damaged now.

- i have not been sober for the past god knows how long, falling asleep is genuinely a gamble as to whether or not i actually wake up.

- i got diagnosed with “any psychiatric disorder”. i am not joking when i say that that is the exact wording on my report.

- i am not allowed to return to employment or education, but im also not allowed to apply for govt benefits because i need a specific diagnosis for that.

- i am broke. because of this i’ve lost 15lbs in 2 weeks cause who the fuck can afford to “eat consistently” and i’ve been throwing up pretty much every morning because of the amount of substances im taking. i am officially in the “dangerously underweight” catagory, which is just fucking incredible, but fuck going to doctors.

- and the CHERRY ON TOPPPPP i may have HAEMORRHOIDS!!!!!. WOOHOO!!!! I LOOOOOOVE MY LIFE!!!! ISNT BEING ALIVE JUST **INCREDIBLE** GUYS???!! ISNT IT JUST ???

whoever the fuck has put these devilish hexes on me please stop i am SO serious rn. 2026 may be the third, or maybe even second worst year of my entire life. i’m so fucking mad rn i don’t even know what to do with myself. i have no one to talk to.

some of this this is a bit tmi but honestly i do not give a fuck.
in the past 3 months alone:

- i lost about 90% of my friends (my fault because i ghosted them)

- my mother died and came back to life. twice.

- she briefly went psychotic.

- she was also homeless at that point so that’s nice.

- i became addicted to codeine cause “well at least i’m not on oxys/ benzos anymore”.

- went into psychosis and got referred to an eip, of whom are now ignoring me.

- my mother is no longer homeless, yayy!! she’s just living in a crack den. yayy..?

- accidental threesome. i say accidental because i was not conscious for the majority of it.

- i’m now on antibiotics because of an infection i caught from said threesome.

- got jumped, pretty sure i’m brain damaged now.

- i have not been sober for the past god knows how long, falling asleep is genuinely a gamble as to whether or not i actually wake up.

- i got diagnosed with “any psychiatric disorder”. i am not joking when i say that that is the exact wording on my report.

- i am not allowed to return to employment or education, but im also not allowed to apply for govt benefits because i need a specific diagnosis for that.

- i am broke. because of this i’ve lost 15lbs in 2 weeks cause who the fuck can afford to “eat consistently” and i’ve been throwing up pretty much every morning because of the amount of substances im taking. i am officially in the “dangerously underweight” catagory, which is just fucking incredible, but fuck going to doctors.

- and the CHERRY ON TOPPPPP i may have HAEMORRHOIDS!!!!!. WOOHOO!!!! I LOOOOOOVE MY LIFE!!!! ISNT BEING ALIVE JUST **INCREDIBLE** GUYS???!! ISNT IT JUST ???

whoever the fuck has put these devilish hexes on me please stop i am SO serious rn. 2026 may be the third, or maybe even second worst year of my entire life. i’m so fucking mad rn i don’t even know what to do with myself. i have no one to talk to.

I was trying to open a savings account, and to my knowledge I thought that it was something that you just added however much money to whenever you felt like it (saving up for a new car). But it’s saying for a regular savings account i’d get around 5% interest. Why?? How am i earning money from nothing?? Does it charge me anything extra? I’m very new to all of this (if you couldn’t tell) so I just need to make sure i wouldn’t be losing anything/ if it’s even worth it. I’d appreciate any and all input, thank you.

EDIT: Thank you everyone for your help, and for anyone asking it’s the Natwest digital regular savings that gives 5.13-5.25% interest. But it also says lower interest rates for a balance over £5000.