u/Fancy-Chipmunk5701

My apartment has more ongoing investigations than a true-crime podcast, and somehow I’m paying to be the main character.

I was already dealing with repair issues, landlord correspondence, and preparing a tenancy dispute. My camera roll is basically an evidence folder with occasional pictures of me trying to have a fucking life.

Then came the bites.

Now I’m dealing with the bed bug situation on top of everything else.

Two of the bites developed into cellulitis, I’m on antibiotics, and I’ve been waking up with more bites.

Pest control has come to inspect, and I’m adding another round of photos, emails, and follow-ups to the pile.

There is something particularly insulting about doing all your laundry and then waking up as breakfast anyway 😂

I would like to spend my time refinishing furniture, making some money, and doing literally anything that doesn’t require a timestamp!

Instead, being a tenant has become an unpaid administrative position where I also provide the catering.

I’m handling it. I’m documenting it. I’m making the calls. But holy fuck, I would like to be allowed to finish dealing with ONE thing before my apartment releases another expansion pack 😣

Anyway. That’s where we’re at. Paying rent to live inside an incident report…

Anyone with a pickup or cargo van available tomorrow for a quick dresser move?

Hi! I’m looking for someone to transport one antique dresser tomorrow. The pickup and drop-off are both in Abbotsford and only about four minutes apart.

The dresser measures approximately 45” wide × 18.5” deep × 53” high.
The drawers can be removed to reduce the weight. Another adult can help, but you’ll need to assist with loading and unloading.

Please message me with your vehicle type, availability, and what you’d charge. I’ll provide the exact addresses privately. Thanks!

Anyone in Abbotsford bored and want to teach me how to play pickleball tonight? 😂

I’ve literally never played before, so expectations should be kept aggressively low.
I just want to get out of the house, try something new, and have a laugh.

Thinking Jubilee Park.

Must be patient and preferably not terrifyingly competitive 😆

I’ve reached the stage of adulthood where I don’t really give a f*ck anymore, so I have no problem admitting that I’ve been shopping almost exclusively in the “Free” section of Marketplace.

Before anyone judges me, have you seen some of these couches? Some are nicer than furniture I’ve actually paid for.

The problem is that I’ve become emotionally invested in several couches and have absolutely no transportation strategy.

I have located the couch. I have not located a truck.
Does anyone know of a cheap local delivery service, community resource, or other creative solution for moving a couch in Abbotsford?

If someone with a truck is feeling particularly heroic, I can repay the favour later this month.

Trying very hard to avoid Plan B, which currently involves a shopping cart, a ratchet strap, and an unreasonable amount of confidence.

I’ll start:

🎬 Abbotsford: The Movie

Title: No Country for Smart Drivers

Tagline: Everyone has somewhere to be. Nobody gets there.

Plot: Four people try to make a left turn. Runtime: 3 hours 17 minutes.

Clearbrook Nights: notes of hot asphalt, unresolved warrants, and somebody else’s bicycle

Wrong answers preferred.

To whoever took my Amazon envelope from Irene Apartments this morning:

You stole someone else’s package on her birthday.

It wasn’t valuable, but I’ve been a personal trainer for 20 years, so congratulations on choosing a very stupid way to introduce yourself.

Honestly, that’s just sad.

Apparently in “who wants to party” was administratively unacceptable if you messaged me before vanished send it again. I was actually getting replies just bored and looking for something to do lol damn Reddit … 😇

I’ve reached the age where “free couch” no longer sounds suspicious.
It sounds financially responsible.

Marketplace is currently full of perfectly decent couches that people apparently just want gone.

Naturally, the universe has responded by ensuring I have absolutely no way to transport one.

I have the couch-finding skills of an elite investigator and the transportation capabilities of a raccoon.

Does anyone know of an affordable way to move a couch in Abbotsford?

If someone with a truck is willing to help, I can’t pay immediately, but I will be able to repay the favor later this month.

Please help before I start drafting operational plans that should never be attempted by civilians. 😂🛋️🦝

Also, my birthday is in a few days, so technically helping me acquire a couch would count as a birthday present and make you an exceptionally good person. 🎂🛋️😂

Most people I talk to seem to identify with one, maybe two. I’m curious if anyone experiences multiple forms consistently and simultaneously.
I’d love to hear from people who have experienced things like clairvoyance, clairaudience, clairsentience, claircognizance, remote viewing, mediumship, precognitive dreams, or similar phenomena on a regular basis.
Looking to connect with others who feel like they experience all of it rather than just one aspect.

I’m not even looking for solutions anymore. I’m conducting a scientific study.

Has anyone actually had a good experience with the Abbotsford Ministry office, and if so, what ancient ritual did you perform beforehand?

I’ve spent the last two days staring at my computer and my brain has officially filed a complaint.

37F in Abbotsford. Looking for a fun, normal-ish single guy who wants to grab food, a drink, and have an actual conversation.😏

Not looking for a pen pal.
Not looking for endless texting.
Not looking for drama.
Just hoping to meet someone funny, easygoing, and capable of holding a conversation without immediately irritating me. (Apparently that’s become a very specific requirement tonight. 😅)

If you’re local, single, and interested in grabbing dinner or a drink, send me a message and tell me a bit about yourself.

Bonus points if you can recommend somewhere better than me sitting in my apartment questioning my life choices.

Let’s just say my former landlord had an… incredibly active imagination about what I did for work 😂✨🙄

Mine:
Abbotsford is the kind of person who says, ‘I know a guy’ 🤣✨😂

If it sounds too good to be true in a parking lot… it is.

Hit me with your best thrift stores in Abbotsford!

I’m on the hunt for hidden gems, weird finds, home décor, furniture, books… basically anything that makes you say, “I can’t believe someone donated this.”

Where should I go first?