u/Ferrisbuellersdayonn

Every day, it feels like Pakistani subs are full of gender wars. Honestly, sometimes I feel like taking a break from Reddit because so many of these posts are just exhausting and toxic.

So, let’s do something different for a change.

No bashing. No stereotypes. No “men are like this” or “women are like that.”

Instead, tell us something you genuinely like, appreciate, or admire about the opposite gender.

Maybe it’s a personality trait, something they do, the way they handle certain situations, or even something small that you find endearing.

Let’s spread some positivity for once. 🫶

What’s something you genuinely appreciate about the opposite gender?

Edit: Here's my compliment: Log kehte hain na, aurat makan ko ghar bana deti hai, sach kehte hain.

It’s because of women, wives, mothers, sisters, and friends, that life feels fuller. They turn houses into homes, moments into memories, and bring a femininity that is simply unmatched.

They don’t just add to your life, they make it feel worth living.

So I'm just a lurker here, i see posts from both men and women and I'd say more than half of them ask for someone without a past. In my opinion, they absolutely have the right to have that standard, if they have not been in a physical relationship as well.

But i see alot of comments here discouraging that, I don't understand, people will immediately say that in islam "you cannot reveal your sins" but also in islam you cannot "lie and decieve to get married" both go hand in hand.

What's your thoughts on this?

I'm a masters student and will graduate next year in sha allah.

I want to apply for a fully funded phD program afterwards, so which countries do you think i should target and why and also which countries to avoid?

Let's discuss one of my favorite genres.

Here are mine:

Heathers

10 things I hate about you

Clueless

Fast times in ridgemont high

The breakfast club

Pump up the volume

American pie

Pretty in pink

And honestly so many more.

What's yours?

I'm 24 and currently doing my MBA, which I should finish next year, insha'Allah. Before/during my MBA, I've accumulated around 2 years of experience working in the corporate world.

Recently, I've become seriously interested in pursuing a PhD abroad. I'm particularly interested in research, learning, and eventually becoming a professor or researcher/scientist. I'd be looking at fully funded programs in the US, UK, Europe, Turkey, etc. I wouldn't want to take on significant debt for a PhD, so funding would be a requirement.

The problem is that I'm struggling with the opportunity cost.

If I continue working after my MBA, I could spend the next 4–5 years building my career, increasing my salary, getting promoted, becoming financially independent, and generally progressing through the corporate world.

If I start a PhD, those same 4–5 years would look very different. I'd probably be living on a PhD stipend, doing research, teaching, and studying. By the time I finish, many of my friends/peers who stayed in industry could be considerably further ahead financially and professionally.

Part of me worries that I'll feel like I'm putting my life on hold until I'm 28–30.

At the same time, I don't want to make a purely financial decision and end up spending 20+ years in a career that I don't actually find intellectually fulfilling. I'm genuinely very interested in research and the idea of becoming highly educated appeals to me a lot. I can actually see myself enjoying the process of doing a PhD rather than viewing it purely as a credential.

So I'm trying to figure out whether I'm looking at this the wrong way.

For those who have done a PhD, are currently doing one, or seriously considered one:

1. Was doing the PhD worth the opportunity cost?

2. Did you feel like you were putting your life/career on hold while your peers progressed?

3. How much does starting a PhD at 24–25 actually matter in the long run?

4. If you had 2 years of corporate experience and an MBA at 24, would you continue working for a few years first or go straight into a funded PhD?

5. For people who left industry for academia/research, did you regret the financial trade-off?

I'm particularly interested in hearing from people who have actually made this decision rather than general opinions about whether PhDs are "worth it."

I'm not expecting the PhD to make me rich. I'm trying to figure out whether the intellectual/academic life is worth giving up several years of potentially much higher earnings and career progression in my 20s.

I'm 24 and currently doing my MBA, which I should finish next year, insha'Allah. Before/during my MBA, I've accumulated around 2 years of experience working in the corporate world.

Recently, I've become seriously interested in pursuing a PhD abroad. I'm particularly interested in research, learning, and eventually becoming a professor or researcher/scientist. I'd be looking at fully funded programs in the US, UK, Europe, Turkey, etc. I wouldn't want to take on significant debt for a PhD, so funding would be a requirement.

The problem is that I'm struggling with the opportunity cost.

If I continue working after my MBA, I could spend the next 4–5 years building my career, increasing my salary, getting promoted, becoming financially independent, and generally progressing through the corporate world.

If I start a PhD, those same 4–5 years would look very different. I'd probably be living on a PhD stipend, doing research, teaching, and studying. By the time I finish, many of my friends/peers who stayed in industry could be considerably further ahead financially and professionally.

Part of me worries that I'll feel like I'm putting my life on hold until I'm 28–30.

At the same time, I don't want to make a purely financial decision and end up spending 20+ years in a career that I don't actually find intellectually fulfilling. I'm genuinely very interested in research and the idea of becoming highly educated appeals to me a lot. I can actually see myself enjoying the process of doing a PhD rather than viewing it purely as a credential.

So I'm trying to figure out whether I'm looking at this the wrong way.

For those who have done a PhD, are currently doing one, or seriously considered one:

1. Was doing the PhD worth the opportunity cost?

2. Did you feel like you were putting your life/career on hold while your peers progressed?

3. How much does starting a PhD at 24–25 actually matter in the long run?

4. If you had 2 years of corporate experience and an MBA at 24, would you continue working for a few years first or go straight into a funded PhD?

5. For people who left industry for academia/research, did you regret the financial trade-off?

I'm particularly interested in hearing from people who have actually made this decision rather than general opinions about whether PhDs are "worth it."

I'm not expecting the PhD to make me rich. I'm trying to figure out whether the intellectual/academic life is worth giving up several years of potentially much higher earnings and career progression in my 20s.

I'm 24 and currently doing my MBA, which I should finish next year, insha'Allah. Before/during my MBA, I've accumulated around 2 years of experience working in the corporate world.

Recently, I've become seriously interested in pursuing a PhD abroad. I'm particularly interested in research, learning, and eventually becoming a professor or researcher/scientist. I'd be looking at fully funded programs in the US, UK, Europe, Turkey, etc. I wouldn't want to take on significant debt for a PhD, so funding would be a requirement.

The problem is that I'm struggling with the opportunity cost.

If I continue working after my MBA, I could spend the next 4–5 years building my career, increasing my salary, getting promoted, becoming financially independent, and generally progressing through the corporate world.

If I start a PhD, those same 4–5 years would look very different. I'd probably be living on a PhD stipend, doing research, teaching, and studying. By the time I finish, many of my friends/peers who stayed in industry could be considerably further ahead financially and professionally.

Part of me worries that I'll feel like I'm putting my life on hold until I'm 28–30.

At the same time, I don't want to make a purely financial decision and end up spending 20+ years in a career that I don't actually find intellectually fulfilling. I'm genuinely very interested in research and the idea of becoming highly educated appeals to me a lot. I can actually see myself enjoying the process of doing a PhD rather than viewing it purely as a credential.

So I'm trying to figure out whether I'm looking at this the wrong way.

For those who have done a PhD, are currently doing one, or seriously considered one:

1. Was doing the PhD worth the opportunity cost?

2. Did you feel like you were putting your life/career on hold while your peers progressed?

3. How much does starting a PhD at 24–25 actually matter in the long run?

4. If you had 2 years of corporate experience and an MBA at 24, would you continue working for a few years first or go straight into a funded PhD?

5. For people who left industry for academia/research, did you regret the financial trade-off?

I'm not expecting the PhD to make me rich. I'm trying to figure out whether the intellectual/academic life is worth giving up several years of potentially much higher earnings and career progression in my 20s.

I'm a Master's student and will graduate next year in sha allah. I want to pursue a phd internationally preferably from the US or Europe, maybe Australia on scholarship.

Please provide any guidance regarding scholarships and the best suited countries for me.

24M | Karachi

Height: 5"8

Currently juggling the final stretch of my MBA and planning for what's next.

My career so far: HR Executive by day, obsessive researcher of completely unrelated topics by night. Ask me about WWII, Islamic history, space, or politics and I will have opinions, sourced from hours I probably should've spent sleeping. I don't research for work, I research because I saw one interesting fact and now I'm four Wikipedia tabs deep and there's no going back.

I'm the friend people come to when they need to vent, and, more often than not, when they actually want advice after. I've been told I give good perspective. Whether that's true or just something people say to be nice, I've chosen to believe it.

My idea of a good time is embarrassingly simple: a decent restaurant, a good movie, and someone worth talking to across the table. I'm playful, I laugh easily, and I try to bring a bit of lightness wherever I go, though I can also be serious when the moment calls for it.

Looks: I'd say, I'm fairly good looking (I feel so weird saying this but this is just so you have an idea if that's important to you)

On faith: I consider myself only Muslim, I'm not attached to any particular sect. I'm working on my five daily prayers, and I'll be honest that it's a work in progress rather than something I've perfected.

Here's the actual plan: I'm finishing my MBA soon, with a PhD after that, ideally from an international university, LUMS as my backup. If the international route works out, I'm genuinely open to relocating, and I'm looking for someone who'd be excited about that possibility, not just tolerating it because it came with the package.

I come from a comfortable middle-class background. If we end up settling abroad, it will probably be a nuclear setup; if we're in Pakistan, I'd lean joint family, though that's a conversation, not a rule I've already decided on alone, also we are only 4 including myself.

Same goes for kids, I'm thinking a year or two after marriage, but that's something we'd figure out together.

One thing I take seriously: how I handle disagreement. I don't do raised voices or low blows, if we're arguing, I want it to still sound like two people who respect each other.

What I'm looking for:

Someone sympathetic and empathetic, to me, and to people generally. Someone striving to be a good Muslim, not a perfect one, because I'm not yet either. Someone who tells me what they need instead of expecting me to guess it. Someone nurturing, and someone who can disagree with me without it turning personal. At minimum, a Bachelor's degree, and somewhere between 21 and 25.

If you're reaching out, I'd genuinely appreciate a real introduction, tell me something about yourself instead of a one-liner. And if you're comfortable sharing a picture, that'd go a long way too. (I'd share mine as well of course)

At the end of it, I want something that feels like a good conversation that never really ends, where we can talk about anything, disagree about plenty, and still end most days over a meal we both actually enjoyed.

My czns and friends have no idea about star wars so if you are interested, we can make a group plan and buy tickets in advance so we know how many people are actually showing up.

I'm male and 24.