u/Few-Director-3357

Hi all,

I have had LS since I was at least 4, it was in remission for most of my life and then now, in my 30's it's rearing it's head again, so I feel like I am learning about it from scratch, especially as my Mum was pretty useless when I asked her about it

My main question, is I want to try and understand what LS flares are like. I'm autistic, so I find I often misunderstand written descriptions like medical ones, or just struggle to relate things to my own experience, even if they are actually the same.

A few years ago, I had what I am assuming was a bad LS flare. My vagina was in so much pain, it was like a deep muscular pain, the only way I could describe it to my GP was that I felt like a full size baby had been ripped from inside me. I was itchy, so dry, and the skin was incredibly fragile. I know from numerous doctors over the last 10 years or so that I have visible extensive LS across my vagina, all along my perineum and around my anus too. When this flare up occured, all of the affected skin just peeled. At its worst going to the toilet was horrific, I dreaded it, trying to wipe with toilet paper was so painful, I switched to wipes, I was taking constant painkillers, and yeah, it was just horrible.

At the time, I didn't know it was an LS flare, I didn't know flares were a thing with LS. Mine had always consisted off a period of intense itching, where the skin would become and fragile and bleed easily, but then things would clear up. I had never experienced anything like this. My GP didn't recognise it as a flare, the sexual health nurse didn't either. I think eventually we came round to thinking it must be the LS, and I am fairly sure it cleared up after I started using clob. I was then referred to a joint Gynae Dermatologist clinic, and the two Drs that saw me there were brilliant.

So I guess what I am asking is, I am still a little unsure if this was actually an LS flare, or something else altogether, as I never seem to see people talking about similar experiences. I think I am at the beginning of another flare too, so.if it is, does anyone have any advice for managing it? I do have clob now, and I shall start reusing it today, but any other advice or tips and tricks would be hugely appreciated.

Hi,

So to give some context, I have been claiming PIP since 2020, awarded standard daily living and no mobility. I scored 11 points, including 0 points for socialising, and I always disagreed with this, but I didn't argue it as I was just grateful to have been awarded anything.

Around March 2024 I had my first review, and my award continued with exactly the same points awarded in the same areas.

May 2025, I am contacted and told that due to DWP's misinterpretation of the guidance around the socialising aspect, and a subsequent review, it had been found that I do meet the criteria and therefore met the criteria for enhanced daily living I was awarded back pay - amazing! Unfortunately this initial review only went up to my last review in 2024, and as said review did not score me as meeting the socialising criteria, I had gone back down to daily living. That last review was also more than 12 months previously, and so I could not try and challenge it or request a Mandatory Reconsideration, etc. I was told my only real option to challenge it was to submit a change of circumstances and be reassessed.

I have ADHD and autism, amongst other conditions, and due to my autism I can often struggle to understand processes, people, etc. In this instance, I again opted not to submit a change of circumstances, as I was so fearful I would lose my claim entirely.

However, I am not at a point where I am experiencing severe autistic burnout. This is the second time this has happened in the last two years and I am beginning to come to the realisation that I may be more disabled than I knew. I fear I may no longer be able to continue working. Socialising with others is becoming a frequent key part of my burnouts, and I am wondering if I should submit a change of circumstances and try and see if my award can be changed? The additional uplift in award, whilst not huge, would go some way to helping and may allow me to reduce my hours in work, or look for a job that works better for me.

Am I being silly here? Will I be jeopardising my entire award? Does this even count as a change of circumstances?

Hi all,

First post here, so please be gentle with me.

I have seen a HR role going near me that I am really interested in applying for. It's an NHS Band 4, so entry level-ish, the job description isn't specifically looking for people with existing HR experience 🥳.

I just have a few questions for people working in HR:

Is HR still a safe career option?

I feel it is a field I would really enjoy working in and I can see viable career progression, but I am concerned that things like the dominance of AI could mean it is more at risk as a profession than I realise. Is the human element of HR still as much of a protective factor as I am thinking?

Also, the job description does not specifically ask for existing HR experience, but it does ask for a demonstrable knowledge of HR. I am more than happy to read up and learn, but how would I best convey that on an application?

I have spent my entire career working in the NHS, and I think I could be really good at this job. I am also excited for a role with career progression again as I am ambitious and would like to work my way up, do more, earn more.

Thanks for reading and any advice.

Hi all, first time posting here so apologies if I get anything wrong.

My bf has been asked to be a groomsman for his best friend, let's call him Gareth's, wedding later this year. My bf is a big man, and whilst he is self conscious about it, he is also perfectly realistic and understands he can struggle to find clothes that fit.

Gareth and his partner have decided they will cover the cost of all bridesmaid and groomsman outfits. But here is the problem, as my bf is too big for the suits they have opted for, they have asked if he will pay the difference to have a suit tailor made, which will potentially cost him hundreds to get one that matches the other groomsmen, etc. Their other suggestion, was that my bf 'just go on a mounjaro for a few months'. Our disposable income is vastly smaller than Gareth and his partner, and Gareth just seems oblivious to how hard weight loss can be. If my bf could lose weight, he would have already.

My biggest issue with this is how Gareth and his partner have handled the whole situation. There was radio silence for months, my bf knew we were were invited, but he didn't know if he was a groomsman or not (granted, that could be typical poor male communication too). I feel like in an effort to avoid a potentially awkward conversation with my bf, Gareth and his partner have put money before Gareth's friendship with my bf.

When my bf first spoke to Gareth and they discussed the suits, my bf was really crushed at Gareth's whole attitude about it. I was absolutely raging for him because I think they have treated him appallingly, whether they meant to or not.

Does anyone have any suggestions? Bf is on a diet, and he's doing well, but the wedding is towards the end of the year, and he has ADHD, so I am concerned that he will get closer to the wedding and struggle to maintain things, and just end up feeling worse about himself. I also *really* want to have a stern conversation with Gareth, and point out how hurtful they have been, but I am trying to reign myself in. Neither Gareth, nor my bf, want my bf to feel he can't be part of the wedding, but my heart breaks for him that this has happened.