u/FileRegular9653

It's a design job at a high Middle/low end of Senior level (in between Junior and Senior). Currently I am bang in the middle of Middleweight. For context, I have been wanting to leave my job for many months, but have been very picky in applications/interviews. I tried to go for jobs abroad as I'm ready for a BIG change in my life, but none of them worked out. Overall, I'm underwhelmed by this offer but don't know whether to think intuitively or tactfully.

PROS:

£4k more net salary

Opportunity for growth/More responsibility

Will be part of a new team for a new project so im not the only newbie

More company benefits eg medical insurance, vouchers

Bigger company: 30 employees (in my current job its 12)

Potentially 2 days wfh (currently 1)

CONS:

Don't like the office location/central touristy area/overwhelming

Office very near my ex's house where i have bad memories

Project style is a bit boring

Gut feeling is mixed - Last time i took a job at a less interesting company my gut feeling was mixed, i ended up hating it and got fired.

No online reviews on Glassdoor so I don't know much about working experience there

I had a lot of travel plans over summer, but i may not be able to book these so early at a new job.

As above I'm 28F, 5'7, and 62kg. Trying to cut to 60kg to be lighter on my feet. I can kick quite high and have good balance. But my power is weak especially punching power. Starting to do some weights at home but only up to 2.5kg dumbbells on each arm, and 6kg kettlebell for lower body/full body. I'm interested in fight IQ and watch a lot of tutorials and sparring tips. But I'm not fast enough in sparring to implement these often.

I have relatively long arms and legs but don't know how to use them effectively in sparring. I don't benefit from having decent reach yet, and always eat shots especially punches. My guard is decent not that bad. Head movement needs work. My shots rarely land, maybe cause i need to work on my distance judging.

Looking at my metrics what do you think my strengths would be and how can i start using them? thanks!

I've been in my design industry for almost 6 years now. I've changed company 4 times.

I am a creative so wanted to stick with a creative job. However I feel i'm meant to do something more fulfiling and meaningful but idk what. I have a side interest that I want to develop into small business idea when the time is right BUT this is not a money maker. I also did petsitting as i love animals, and even considered looking into animal rescue jobs, but the pay is really bad sadly.

My main focus is salary at the moment, and anxiety about my time running out and wasted potential. I'm 28, single, struggling financially. I don't see how i could realistically change route at all unless i have a good safety net of money. But - i know people think this way and wake up 40 years later...

After almost 2 years at my current job where i'm unhappy, I just got an offer for a new role paying £4k more.

Of course I'm pleased, but I feel a dark cloud at the thought of continuing this again somewhere else. I want to turn my back on it all, but earning more is important for me right now. I have mixed feelings & dunno what to do. Do I go in, bear it for a year and try to save up a little bit more? And leave at 29 potentially more stressed and depressed?

There's no job i could do that would pay more as this is what im qualified for. I considered moving home to my family and taking a sabbatical. But the home environment is quite remote/rural and lowkey family problems.

Any advice..?

I got a rib injury from a 'light sparring' session that had me skip training for 2 weeks (and quit my gym - not cause of the injury specifically). It's been almost 3 weeks since the injury.

I'm not 100% back yet and it hurts if i try to throw a cross with power. The whole experience including the moment it happened with everyone staring at me, humiliation, the pain & shock to my system. I was kneeling on the floor struggling to breathe. It was really affected me and knocked my confidence. I'm 28 and wondered am I too old or sensitive or not cut out for this.

The guy who injured me said it was basically my fault for choosing to spar with him and was pretty cocky about it. A little apologetic but still lowkey blamed me. I didn't even know who he was - he was just stood right in front of me and was a similar build to me so i asked hey wanna spar? I explicitly asked to go light at the beginning. This all left a bad taste in my mouth as I'm less experienced than him and a woman.

So I got anxious stepping back into the gym (new gym) but can't avoid sparring as it's included in almost every session here. I know if i took another bad hit in same spot might take months to recover. How can I move on from this fear? is it normal?

I went to Chiang Mai last November alone for some *super casual* training. I had pre paid a whole intensive week of training with accom in a remote gym. Got there, freaked out as reality hit, I was feeling super unwell, I ditched the training camp and stayed in the city centre, and went to just 2 classes. I feel disappointed in myself, I really couldn't handle it at the time. My MH was bad and thailand was overwhelming.

November was good weather for chiang mai. But at the same time there was flooding in Phuket areas and a bit in bangkok.

I'm now planning to go back, I haven't stopped thinking about it. I don't need to have a fight, but want to do more training.

I want to try a different part of Thailand to train - maybe Koh Samui as I know people who've gone there for training. What do you recommend? And what months do you find best weather wise/ business wise in Thailand? How can I prepare better this time around?

I loved the following books and want to find similar reads.. they are mostly about Japan.. any recommendations? I absolutely love poignant imagery and a romantic touch, but the genre doesn't have to be romance.

Laws of Evening - Mary Yukari Waters

In Praise of Shadows - Jun'ichirō Tanizaki

How Kyoto Breaks Your heart - Florentyna Leow

A Single Rose - Muriel Barbary

Geisha of Gion - Mineko Iwasaki

My love for perfume is going to the next level, i'm considering going to Grasse to visit all the museums and tour the different perfume manufacturers like Molinard, Fragonard, Galimard. It will not be a cheap trip - i am financially challenged currently, don't think it's wise to be spending but it's such a passion of mine and bank holiday is coming up. Anyone done this? is it worth it? am i being silly

I got a bruised rib 2 weeks ago from a spinning heel kick in sparring. The 1st week was bad and I couldn't get out of bed, carry things, cough or laugh without sharp pain. Now, it's 90% healed with mild bruise pain when i do certain twists/ab work. Oh and sneezing hurts like a b****.

I'm ready to go back to training and take it easy on that side. But i read healing takes 3-4 weeks. Has anyone had this before and how long should you take off to make sure it doesn't linger?

Also - am I being a baby about this? When I tell people it sounds like I'm really milking a 'normal' injury but on my side i've never had anything like this before and it was quite horrible.

I'm not a fighter just doing this for a hobby.

I'm not a situationship person, i met someone once for a casual thing but we ended up getting along and it's turned into a month of seeing each other. I didn't want to drag it on and get attached. He's leaving the country in a few months and also still lives at home. Sometimes we just hang out or cuddle not sexual. He said i could also just go round to see his pets as i love animals (lol i won't do this though).

The conversation is sometimes stagnant and underwhelming, we're both introverted, i've been thinking of ending things but i am a bit attached to him already. Is this normal for a situationship, how do i know when to end things?

I want something serious and higher quality but struggling with loneliness and lack of chemistry when i do go on dates with other people.

I don't know what i really want in life long term, i have no enthusiasm for it. The things i really wanted was to have a better childhood but i can't do anything about that. I need a major change, but it doesn't seem to be happening naturally despite what options i try.

I want to connect with people, and have adventures together, and realise life is OK and we'll all be OK. I wish i could rescue animals. Random things like that.

Career/money: I work in design. I like the topic but the job is 50/50 sometimes i hate it, it doesn't pay very well. Been increasing my salary year by year and progressing at work, but still doesn't seem to catch up with inflation or change my quality of life. I can just pay for a gym membership now lol. I live frugally and don't socialise much cause it's expensive eg going out dinner/drinks, £40 ticketed events or shopping. Tried looking for jobs abroad (especially interested in Asia) as i feel ready for a big life change, but there aren't many. There was one i was super hopeful for and spoke to a company for a while, but the visa eligibility came back negative recently. i was gutted.

Dating: not been going great, been single officially for 4/5 years now. Potential serious realtionships happened twice, but it wasn't right ultimately. A few situationships. Trying to invest in healthy potential, decent people, but also can be expensive and time consuming so i date sparingly and trying to meet people IRL more through gym classes etc. but nothing's happened so far.

Kids: As above - not sure about starting a family, it's not a life goal and i'm very skeptical about it.

Traveling: I still have dreams here, but this a shorter term thing and won't fix everything i realise.I just hope it can inspire me and bring some clarity by stepping away from my daily grind and meeting new people. My travel interests are also in Asia, i practice a martial art which i have travelled for before to try some training. It's financially dependent and restricted by work unless i quit. Longest i can go away is 2 weeks, which I have done, but came back feeling like it was unfinished business. Sabbatical would be ideal but my company not open to it.