u/Financial-Pace6378

how do i get him to "open wide" to latch better? sometimes he does great, other times he just wont open his mouth wide enough. i didnt know if theres a trick to help, kinda like when you rub on the roof of their mouth to stimulate their reflexes to suck, but for opening their mouth wide instead.

it just pinches a little sometimes and id like to make this as comfortable for both of us. he's still getting enough to eat and emptying me, i just dont want my nipples to be more sore than they need to be lol

i swore to myself i wouldnt be one of those people who loses who they were. i thought i wasnt the kind of person who would attach so strongly to motherhood, and obsess over every little thing about it. i never judged those women, for so many people thats what they want and who they want to be, but i never envisioned myself having kids and i figured i would be me first, and a mother second. im 3 weeks in and it feels like thats all out the window. every moment of my day is for this baby. all of my social media is about prenatal/postpartum/childcare/breastfeeding/sleeping methods. i barely shower, i cry when im away from my baby, im taking pride in my milk supply when i never thought any of that would matter so much to me. i feel like ive lost myself and it hurts so badly, but part of me is okay with it. i dont know if it's just because it's so early already, but even when i talk to people it's about my baby or my partner. i am so centered around my family already in a way i never thought i would be.

im almost 3 weeks in and im having an extremely hard time. i am still hurting and healing but i cant stop thinking that i should be over it. at 10 days i tried to go on a walk and for the next 3 days after i felt like my insides were trying to fall out. i can only sleep in 2 hour intervals max, and usually less than that. i shower maybe every 4 days? i can count on one hand how many times ive showered since ive been home from the hospital. even if i try to go out and run an errand i end up crying because i cant handle being away from my baby

my partner is so helpful, helps with baby, does house and yard work, and is able to continue to maintain his hobbies, as most of them are just in the house. he even went out to lunch once with his coworkers but was only gone 3 hours. it upsets me so much though. i dont need him here all the time, or directly by me all the time, but i cant help but be upset that he doesnt feel what im feeling. i cant imagine doing anything i enjoy right now, it feels like i just rotate between feeding baby, pumping, eating, and maybe sleeping. if i can get baby down in bassinet, i just beg my partner to cuddle with me. i try and make sure he gets 6-8 hours of sleep per night so hes able to help me during the day whenever i need, because i really dont sleep at night. in between feedings every 2 hours i just cry and hold baby and sit awake. he goes in his bassinet sometimes, but it's pretty inconsistent, so i let him fall asleep on me a lot. i know i shouldnt.

im just having such a hard time accepting that even though my partner's life is changing drastically, it feels like it's still changing so much less than mine is. im not pregnant anymore but my body still isnt mine, and i still feel immobile. i feel lazy and useless, and seeing him maintaining hobbies and relationships makes me feel so jealous, and i feel like i cant complain to him about it because he would just try and fix the issue. which im grateful for, but when he takes baby i dont immediately think of picking up a book or painting like i usually do, i just want to sleep. i feel like im failing at life and im going to fail my baby and my partner.

is this normal? is this jealousy normal?

my baby is nearing 3 weeks old, i have a bassinet i have him nap in during the day but at night he falls asleep on my chest and i just stay awake the whole night to let him. i try and make as many of his daytime naps in his bassinet as possible to get him used to being in there. i refuse to fall asleep with him when hes sleepiglnv on me, because i know how dangerous this is and i know this is a bad habit to start, but he looks so peaceful and at rest. i cannot stop crying thinking about how he feels falling asleep on mt chest but waking up in a bassinet. he transfers well but doesnt sleep as long as he does on my chest, and is a little fussy/noisy in his sleep when he's in there. i think this is also a me issue, i have such a hard time being away from him, even though is bassinet is within arms reach. my partner is asleep at night and without my baby on me i just feel so lonely.

did anyone else feel this way? my emotions are all over the place but i want to do whats best for my baby. how do i get over this?

im 9 days post partum and my bab is already back up to birth weight, so i think im making enough for him right now. i feed every 2 to 3 hours (i shoot for 2 bc im paranoid he'll lose weight) but ive only been pumping a few times a day, usually right after i feed him. im so ignorant on the topic of lactation and the consultant at the hospital wasnt helpful really, she didnt explain latching, holds, supply, or even mention pumping at all, and i only saw her RIGHT after i gave birth so i wasnt super ready to ask questions.

should i be pumping more to establish a greater supply? i know i cant control everything but i do eventually have to go back to work, so i would like to have something to store. i wont be upset if i have to rely on formula, i just would rather not. in my head, i get scared to pump in-between feeds because ive convinced myself i'll be too empty to make bab feel full, but i dont think that's the case, as usually after i pump im still lactating/could hand express more. should i pump after every feed? or how many times a day? im feeding 8-12 times, and pumping that often almost sounds excessive but i dont know what im doing

i had him! induced at 39+1, started pitocin at 7am and had my water broke, had baby by 3:30pm ish

it went so much better than i could've expected, i totally am in so much pain, but ive never felt so much love for anything in my life. this was so worth it. i know it's only going to get so much more difficult from here. i got an hour of rest though! and then got up to feed at 1 am lol, and he's back swaddled and asleep. my partner was here through everything, only ever left the room to get us water or juice. i finally convinced him at 11:30 that he NEEDS to get some rest lol, he was dedicated to staying up until the 1am feed, but i need him rested. i feel so much love for the family im starting, im not sure what the point of this post is, im just so emotional.

ive been so grateful for the information and support I've found here. im not close with many people at all, and at times it felt like this was the only place i could find understanding and feel seen. i do not know if i'll ever be pregnant again lmao, this has definitely been quite the process, but i hope all women, no matter what stage of pregnancy or what choice they make find a safe space here, thank you all so so much.