u/FlightOwn6461

Not to sound rude, but my BF is extremely anxious. Our arguments are a huge trigger for him, so I'm trying to learn how to bring issues up.

For example: He has a history of being mean after he drinks. So last week, he started getting really pushy in bed, and he kept demanding that I comfort him physically. After I left, I texted him and I said "I don't feel good after our last encounter."

He said: "I'm sorry that's how you feel. We can schedule a check in."

But the problem is that:

- will act like he forgot. If I don't remind him, he'll casually ask at 11pm.

- he doesn't reference any of my concerns or the fight

- he mostly says "I don't want to trigger your trauma," or "I can't talk until I feel safe," or "I'm sorry you feel that way."

So, AITAH for triggering his anxiety?

I recently lost a family member, and I was devastated. I'm also working long hours, and I was really struggling.

My boyfriend was a saint and welcomed me into his house. He's been amazing and takes care of me.

But he says "you're only staying here while you're sick," and that was the agreement. But we never actually talked about it.

The problem is that I'm feeling better. But he still won't talk about the living situation (I've been here for 10 weeks). When I say that I should try and transition home, he'll buy me something new.

When I go out at night he says "come back here so I can make sure that you're okay."

I guess I'm confused? He's not ready for more because he needs me to be more respectful.

So, AIO for feeling confused?

We've been together for six months, and we spend 6 nights together during the week. The intensity of my schedule recently reduced (yay!) and I've been out with friends quite a bit.

My BF bashed his knee. It was bruised. I helped him with Advil, getting a brace, etc.

But I've noticed he cries out in pain and want to cuddle. Most recently, I was meeting with my male tutor, and my BF cried out.

I'm suspicious because I overheard him say "I'm going to limp so they go easy on me."

Overall, I love cuddling with him. But how to discuss this...?

Tl:dr boyfriend fakes his pain for attention

I'm confused. My partner will act very dismissive --- he ignores me, critiques little things, he woke up and left b without kissing me.

I end up crying and leave. He texts me and says "Do you want a new iPad?" But I said "I want you to be nice," and he says he is and then accuses me of lashing out.

He says that he didn't do anything wrong and that he was confused. When I point out the behavior, he says that it wasn't his intention and that "you just don't agree with me."

Then he's back to being nice but won't admit he's being mean. But I don't want *things* I want him to be nice.

Is this abusive? Anyone experienced this?