u/Friendly-Map-7391

Not so long ago, there was a study saying that one third of Gen Z men believe in the “red pill,” but honestly, from my friendships with men, I feel like it’s more like two thirds.

I find it really sad to see so many men believe in something that makes them miserable. Even I sometimes have trouble keeping hope because of a lack of real-life experiences that contradict it, but I still don’t want to believe things like the 80/20 rule.

When i see comments online about dating there’s almost always someone pushing red-pill ideas, and beneath that, it’s often just men who don’t believe they’re enough.

It’s sad to think this might become the norm today that some men will stop trying entirely, or that some will reproduce and teach these ideas to their sons.

Social media really did destroy us and i don't know were we go from there, because I don’t think men were this miserable in the ’70s or ’80s.

I’m a virgin and I’m trying to get laid this year. I don’t want to wait for a relationship because I feel like it would take too much effort in my life right now. I’ve never tried clubs or bars, so I want to try them this summer. But I hear a lot that men who go out with the intention of getting laid are disgusting, and that people can ‘feel it.’ How come girls can go out wanting to hook up and it’s seen as okay?

I mean, how are you supposed to get laid if you don’t have that intention and aren’t proactive about your goal?

Recently I got a job as a security guard. At first, everything was going well, but then I started constantly being in my head. Normally, I’m someone who just can’t escape his thoughts because every night I vent my frustrations to ChatGPT, but now, since I basically have nothing to do, I’ve started to feel more and more extremely depressed. I have never been closer to thinking about suicide, honestly.

The thing causing all of this is how complicated it feels to lose my virginity and get a first girlfriend. At this point, I just believe it’s hopeless. My own experience has shown me that it’s basically all luck. People say you need “make your own luck,” but even if you go out and do activities like I do (I have two jobs, one as a counselor and the other at an art place and i took acting classes too) most girls are already in relationships. Dating apps are impossible for me but my friends have 100 matches.

It just feels like it’s so fucking rare to find a girlfriend, but then how do I explain that seemingly every person has one or has had multiple experiences except me?

Honestly, the comparison is killing me. I think I could live more with the fact that I might get a first girlfriend at 90 than with the feeling that everyone else has way more luck and experience than me.

And basically, my only way to lose my virginity is to get a girlfriend. So now I’m just waiting and suffering every single day. How can I stop thinking about this or feel better? I feel like the only way to escape the pain is to either ignore it, to die or to finally get experience.

I'm going to start therapy soon, so at least there's that. But if someone has gone through what i'm going through can you please give me advice.

Edit: i upgraded my ru7100 from 10 years to tcl qm8k if it wasn't clear. I play remux files from bluray sources and have changed settings of the tv with the calebrated video

I just got the TCL QM8K. I was so hyped because my last TV was a Samsung RU7100 from 10 years ago. I researched for so long, and I thought having a new TV would change how I see movies and that I would impress all my friends. But when I got it and used it, to find out it’s 90% hype and 10% result is fucking brutal.

Honestly, right now I’m somewhere between grief and acceptance that this is the best TV can give, and being angry that this is the best a TV can give after 10 years. The image honestly isn’t mind-blowing at all. The 3000 nits on Mad Max which is apparently the best hdr aren’t even blinding.

I’m so happy I didn’t buy an OLED, because I think if I would’ve and found this out, I would have set the TV on fire. God, those purists talking about blooming when you can’t even see it at all honestly, do not listen to them, they are fucking autistic.

So yeah, don't really know what to do except just sit with the feeling.

Why is getting a girl so complicated as a man? Look, even if I don’t believe in the 80/20 rule or incel stuff, cause it feels as a man the reality is you’re single and sexless 90% of the time. Obviously dating apps suck you get one match a week most of the time, and it doesn’t give you many chances to actually meet the person because it could be a bot or they could just ghost you.

I never understood the “just wait” advice either. I’ve never had a girlfriend in my 22 years, and all I’ve done is wait. Now as an adult, I try to socialize the more i can at jobs and in classes, but every girl I’m interested in is already in a relationship.

I mean, I feel like the only way to have a FWB or a girlfriend is to do cold approaches. What the hell is this? Is it like this for you too?