In June of 2025 I met this guy/coworker that I really didn't pay any mind to, and wouldn't have paid any mind to if he hadn't drowned me with a tsunami of attention. Looking back I wish he had just left me alone. He's much younger than me and I hate talking about "leagues", but yeah, he was way out of mine. In the beginning he spoke to me and only me. I found him strange and a little annoying to be perfectly honest, until he started saying things that really struck a cord with me. He had asked me to hang out with him a few times before I finally agreed. Then it was all over lol. We both had the best time and quickly became best friends. He caused so much confusion in the beginning because like I said, he showered me with attention and was always paying me compliments on my appearance and personality. I started to think he actually liked me. I kept telling myself "no way", but my coworkers kept getting in my ear telling me that he likes me and it's obvious. Part of me deep down knew this couldn't be possible, but the level of kindness, Chivalry and attention this guy was throwing at me started making me think this could be real. I started to really get close to him and eventually understood his personality and realized that he had mental health issues of his own. Truth is, he felt safe with me and trusted me which is why he clung to me. He was in a new place and probably felt very uncomfortable, and my vibe made him feel comfortable. Ok, at this point I absolutely adored him. I didn't care that he wasn't interested in me romantically. I obviously provided something for him and that made me feel really good. I felt valuable. But yeah, now I had feelings, which can and usually does cause strain on any friendship. My energy shifted around him because I was petrified of losing him. Anyone would pick up on that. Finally it became too much and I confessed my feelings. I wasn't telling him because I thought there was a chance they'd be reciprocated, I was telling him to explain my sudden strange behavior. At this point I was convinced that he'd understand and wouldn't ghost me because of it. I had delusions that he'd actually help me through it by talking and being open. The night I told him he was awesome, supportive and apologetic. He promised that nothing would change. I was convinced that I did the right thing and him and I would be friends for life. The next time we worked together he was a totally different person. He was straight up cold to me and when I confronted him he gaslit me so bad, told me it was all in my head. I texted a few days later asking to talk this through and 3 days later he came back with "there's nothing to talk about at this point". He ghosted me completely in mid October. March 5th I regretfully reached out telling him how he destroyed me. No reply. I'm now in crisis and actively seeking therapy and possibly medication. My mom actually passed away 3 weeks ago and since then I have been having extreme anxiety attacks. I've been dealing with them since the pandemic, but had gotten them under control...until recently. Last night I sent him an email because I suspect he's blocked my phone number. After I reached out in March I was consumed with embarrassment and regret, especially after so many months of no contact. That was enough...I really had to send that email last night? What is wrong with me? When am I going to accept and move on? It's starting to feel like never. Thanks for listening.
u/Full_Ad1938
I had this conversation with a coworker who was referring to another coworker that he despised.
Him- I can destroy her!
Me- What do you mean?
Him- I can get into her head and make her want to kill herself.
Me- You mean like Hannibal Lecter in silence of the lambs?
Him- Exactly!
Me- Why would you want to do that?
Him- Because I can
I'm curious to hear outside opinions on this personality type? Are these the words of a textbook narcissist?
"I can destroy her! I can get inside of her head and make her want to off herself". For context, I was close friends with the person that said these exact words about a coworker he didn't like. After 7 months of no contact with this person I am still struggling to heal from being ghosted by him. I've heard many strong opinions on the type of person who would say such a thing. I'd like to hear yours. Please and thank you!
I'll never understand how, or why someone can make such an effort to make you like them only to discard you when you actually do. I never would have went there on my own. You were persistent, I was resistant. I finally caved and let my guard down because I trusted you. My life is now in complete shambles because of what I had foolishly invested in you, and you can't even talk to me. You can't even say "I'm sorry I hurt you", or "I didn't mean to hurt you"....you just left me for dead. It's been 7 months and I'm still bleeding. I still can't get past this state of shock that I've been in since you sent that heartless text you sent on October 11th. I was convinced you were the kindest most caring person I had ever met. I wish I can tell myself you're just a bad guy and you were just using me, but a bad guy wouldn't have life long friends like you have. They were just as awesome as I thought you were. They treated me with the same kindness as you did. Obviously I was the problem. You could've talked to me. I would've listened.