u/GrumpyCatPerson

I’m a support worker in the UK and have done this job for many years. I’ve always loved my job. I’m also autistic and have ADHD, it’s a struggle but I manage. There is one colleague however who seems to have it out for me, they’ll literally make stuff up, say I’ve left the units I’ve been in untidy when I haven’t, says I haven’t given the clients food or fluids, reports that I haven’t done the washing, constantly complains about me. There’s also another colleague that told them that I did slanting that was absolutely 100% not true, couldn’t have been me in any way as yet they still wrote it in my file and threatened me with performance.

I admit to my mistakes. I told the manager this when I spoke to them. I have made a couple of them and I will own up to them but I’m not going to own up to things I haven’t done or said. And then another carer told me that people are talking about me behind my back.

I’ve had a very bad year with my mental health, it’s been a real struggle, and these people seem to take great pleasure in trying to see me fail or purposely want to take my job away from me. Because I was doing so well and now it’s being taken away from me.

I have such a good rapport with my clients. They all feel safe with me. I have a bond with all of them and I know them all so well. But the staff are just ruining it because they’re purposely lying to try and get me into trouble and I don’t understand why.

It never seems to get better. It feels like no matter what I do, or how hard I try. Whatever medication I take, or what therapy I try I’m just going to be sick forever. And honestly, a big part of me tells me I probably deserve it because there’s not one person in the world who really cares that much. Who can honestly and genuinely say they care? I’m just a burden and an annoyance to everyone I meet. I can barely do my job without extra support. I’m barely holding on and I feel like I’m drowning.

The only person who ever cared about me, who got me through all my trauma died last year. The one who would talk me through my dark periods. My big brother. I miss him everyday. A part of me died that can’t be replaced the day he died. I’m an even more empty shell. I feel like a cold, heavy cloak is placed on me all the time.

I’m just empty, cold and flat. I have no enjoyment and the world feels 2D. I’ve never been happy in my life. I don’t think I ever will be. I don’t post this asking for pity, I post this because I need to get this off of my chest. To try and put into words how I’m feeling. I truly hate depression.

I have a five year old female British Shorthair who is otherwise in very good shape. She’s not overweight and has not other issues. However when she sleeps, her snoring is very loudly. I’m talking as a person who is deaf in one ear and can hardly hear in the other. My British Shorthair snores very loudly and has loud breathing on occasions. Even when she sleeps under the bed, I can hear her snoring.

She still eats and drinks well, plays and has no problem breathing otherwise. Occasionally she’ll be a bit louder breathing but she doesn’t have open mouth breathing, panting or show any signs of pain or distress or shortness of breath.

I’m just worried about her breathing and that it cools be a problem. I’ve got a vet appointment booked but I’m just worried about them finding something serious!

I’m into post apocalyptic books at the moment and would love an action-packed, gritty, edge of your seat thriller type book that can still pack an emotional punch! I don’t mind what causes the apocalypse, whether it’s a virus, weather, nuclear threat, comets, aliens etc but I would prefer if there’s nothing political as I’m trying to escape from all that!

I’ve already read The Stand by Stephen King, The Road, and Bird Box!

I’ve suffered from fibromyalgia and chronic migraines for over ten years and now it’s developed into back spasms, neuropathy and hearing issues. I also have a chronic lifelong condition called POTS which requires medication to control it. I have so many people say that I’m too young to be in such high levels of pain and I shouldn’t be taking all these medications every day. I alway hit back with, “What do you want me to say? I have them!”

I’m in constant pain that’s barely controlled by painkillers. I’m exhausted and I have other chronic illnesses that haven’t been diagnosed yet but because I’m not 70 years old I should be running marathons, not have any pain at all and be on top of the world.

I even had a colleague tell me that fibromyalgia doesn’t exist. Okay, I’ll tell my doctor that my diagnosed condition that he prescribes strong opiates for isn’t real because Karen from work says so. I’m 33 but I’ve had issues with pain since I was little. I always had joint pain and instability. I always used to get such severe migraines that I would be screaming and crying in pain, the only thing that helped was opiates and a dark room with ice packs.

When my joints give way at work or I’m wearing my knee brace, some colleagues look at me like, why are you wearing that? And I just roll my eyes because they can’t imagine the pain I’m in. They don’t know that my ribs have moved out of space three times that day, that my stomach is in agony because I ate a bit of cheese or that I feel like I’m going to faint because I stood up too quickly.

Someone at work said, if “I was you, I wouldn’t even bother working. I’d sit at home in disability.” I shot him down and said, “Why should I?” Yes I’m in pain and I struggle massively every day, but I want to work, I want to do something despite these illnesses. I might have to do just that one day but for now I’m going to keep going and doing my job which I love.

I find people’s poor attitude is so much worst than the illness sometimes.