Hello everyone, due to circumstances me and my BF cannot go to Graspop this year...
I bought the Skullies package and Canvashut and my BF bought the tickets. He transferred the tickets to me so I could sell them through Ticketswap and they're gone.
My question is: is it possible for a friend to link his ticket to my Graspop account/wallet so he can use our Skullies? (we didn't link our tickets to the wallet with the Skullies)
I have ended an 8 year friendship, sorry for the long post but I needed to vent and I'm curious what other people have to say about this. Our friendship started after she became my neighbour in my flat, we were both single and eventually we starting hanging out. We're very different, but we have some similar interests. She's outgoing, charming and loves attention whereas I'm shy, awkward and prefer to be left alone. I also have problems with voicing my feelings, boundaries and standing up for myself. I have always been there for her, and I backed up my words with actions. The other way around: not so much and in the last 2 years: not at all. And some incidents happened, like:
I bought a ticket for a festival with the intention of going alone, when we talked about this she said that she was also going and with some friends, she asked with whom I was going and I said "alone" and then she made a screenshot of our convo and she accidentally send it to me with a question that made it clear she was mocking me. She quickly deleted it as it was supposed to be send to another friend and she defended herself by saying that I was wrong for thinking I could just join her and her friends, even though I told her that I sometimes go to festivals alone and I never asked her if I could join. She kept making assumptions and then a little later she said that she was tired because of her daughter.
She stole my medication while we were on holiday together, I take ritalin for my AuDHD and I had put it in a drawer (by my bed). Then one morning I couldn't find it, I searched and it was in her toiletry bag in the bathroom. I didn't ask or confront her: my mistake. She also uses her daughter's ritalin sometimes, as a party pick-me-up.
When she got into her current relationship, I was 3rd wheeling sometimes, or he invited himself to our hangouts and it became harder for me to see her 1 on 1. And during our 1 on 1s she mostly talked about: her BF, other men she had flirted with and she spend time looking at her phone.
I have been SA'd by a friend of hers at her party and by a friend of her BF while they were in the vicinity. When I spoke to her about it, I got the sense that she diminished my experience and I let it go. Over the years I got the increasing sense that she prioritizes male approval above all else. She loves getting their attention and it has helped her in her career and getting stuff (done).
Her materialistic side became more prominent during her current relationship; she started bragging about how much money she has/makes and her inheritance. She talks about the house and other stuff she will get, but nothing about her dad who she loved very much. She is also the only friend who always sends payment requests after every 'event' or hang, and she checks mine because she has send me proof dat I miscalculated and demanded to pay a lower amount, and we're talking cents here.
And I noticed that I never hear or see anything about her friends anymore, I've been to all the birthdays (but like after 3 or 4 years into the friendship) and it was only me, her BF and her close family. She seems completely consumed by her BF, who btw has a best friend that has been cheating on his wife for years and he covers for him. My friend and her BF have had many fights, right from the start (last one was Sunday because he prob cheated again). It's a toxic relationship because they're both vain and insecure, and they don't trust each other and avoid accountability. I have witnessed some screaming matches between them about trivial stuff (Instagram followers and posts) and he has shoved her and grabbed her by the throat. After each fight she tells me that he only acts this way because of his past (emotional neglect by his dad). He has also cheated after which he asked her to marry him and she accepted, when I asked questions about this she became defensive and said that they would remain engaged and not actually marry... But because they post everything other people also assumed they will get married and they don't deny this. So it's all for show.
Recently they bought a house. They started searching right after me and my BF told them we were going to buy a house together. Which is weird because my friend really didn't want to live together; they both had an appartment close to each other and she wanted to be able to get away from him after a fight, which happened often. She said couple of times that she wanted to use our house as a safe haven whenever she wanted to get away from him.
I'm the only one she vented to, and for the last 2+ years I mainly saw her when she wanted to vent after a fight, after which they went on as usual (they both didn't change after a fight) and I had an increasingly difficult time with acting normal towards her BF. She had even acknowledged a few times that her BF is manipulative and that their relationship is toxic, and I never understood why she didn't break up with him. They both flirt with other people and are very jealous.
I'm also to blame in this wreckage of a story because I never spoke up; I have a delayed emotional response (sometimes I really don't know what I'm feeling or why) and I'm kind of a doormat. I'm working on this and I have an incredible BF who supports me. I want to be able to speak up after I feel wronged. She lied to me recently about gossiping and then she said that she didn't have time to talk about our friendship after I asked for this, so that was the final straw. And because she didn't want to meet up or call I send her texts, and I told her my feelings and when and why my boundaries were crossed. Her replies reminded me of an acronym my therapist once said in reference to my narcissistic ex: DARVO. She didn't acknowledge my feelings, denied that some things happened (twisted some facts), got very defensive and then pretended she was the victim because she had a shitty week and didn't have the energy to do this shit. She blocked me on everything and removed herself from our groupchats.
All the puzzle pieces fell in place because she showed her true self, and I always had this feeling that something was off in our friendship: I think she is a narcissist, like my ex (and prob her BF). And why I was friends with her for 8 years? She was my only friend for years after I moved. It was really nice having someone to spend time who also lived next to me, and I hate that I let this go on for so long (this post is a 'summary', more shitty things have happened and some I forgot). We still live in the same city and we move in the same social circles, so I will bump into her many times I'm afraid. I hate confrontation, and I know that she's the type that will approach our friends and say bad things about me and act sad for sympathy. I guess time will tell how toxic she really is.
Hello everybody, I'm going to end an 8 year friendship, sorry for the long post but I needed to vent and I'm curious what other people have to say about this. Our friendship started after she became my neighbour in my flat, we were both single and eventually we starting hanging out. We're very different, we have some similar interests but she's vain (no judgement but it's the best word) and loves attention whereas I'm shy and prefer to be left alone. I also have problems with voicing my feelings, boundaries and standing up for myself. I have always been there for her, and I backed up my words with actions. The other way around: not so much and in the last 2 years: not at all. And some incidents happened, like:
I bought a ticket for a festival with the intention of going alone, when we talked about this she said that she was also going and with some friends, she asked with whom I was going and I said "alone" and then she made a screenshot of our convo and she accidentally send it to me with a question that made it clear she was mocking me. She quickly deleted it as it was supposed to be send to another friend and she defended herself by saying that I was wrong for thinking I could just join her and her friends, even though I told her that I sometimes go to festivals alone and I never asked her if I could join. She kept making assumptions and then a little later she said that she was tired because of her daughter.
She stole my medication while we were on holiday together, I take methylfenidate for my AuDHD and I had put it in a drawer (by the bed). Then one morning I couldn't find it, I searched and it was in her toiletry bag in the bathroom. I didn't ask or confront her: my mistake. She also uses her daughter's ritalin sometimes.
When she got into her current relationship, I was third wheeling sometimes, or he invited himself to our hangings and it became harder for me to see her 1 on 1.
I have been sexually assaulted by a friend of hers at her party and by a friend of his while they were in the vicinity. When I spoke to her about it, I got the sense that she diminished my experience. Over the years I got the sense that she prioritized male approval above all else.
Her materialistic side became more prominent during her current relationship; she started bragging about how much money she has/makes and her inheritance after her father died. She talks about the house and other stuff she will get, but nothing about her dad who she loved very much. She is also my only friend who always sends payment requests after every 'event', and she checks mine because she has send me proof dat I miscalculated and demanded to pay a lower amount (we're talking cents here).
And I noticed that I never hear or see anything about her friends anymore. She seems completely consumed by her BF, who btw has a best friend that has been cheating on his wife for years and he covers for him. My friend and her BF have had many fights, right from the start. It's a toxic relationship because they're both vain and insecure, and they don't trust each other and avoid accountability. I have witnessed some screaming matches between them about trivial stuff (Instagram followers and posts) and after each fight she tells me that he acts this way because of his past (emotional neglect by his dad). He has also kinda cheated after which he asked her to marry him and she accepted, when I asked about this she became defensive and said that they would remain engaged and not actually marry... Recently they bought a house, they started searching right after me and my BF told them we were going to buy a house together. Which is weird because my friend really didn't want to live together; they both had an appartment close to each other and she wanted to be able to get away from him after a fight.
I'm the only one she vents to, so for the last 2+ years I only see her when her BF has other plans and when she wants to vent after a fight, after which they go on as usual (they both don't change after a fight) and I have an increasingly difficult time with acting normal towards her BF.
I know this is also my fault because I never spoke up; I'm autistic and I have a very delayed emotional response (sometimes I really don't know what I'm feeling or why). I'm working on this and I have an incredible BF who supports me. I want to be able to speak up after I feel wronged. She lied to me today and then she said that she didn't have time to talk about our friendship (I wanted this), so that was the final nail in the coffin. I'm contemplating sending her a text which would be a summary of all the above. Or I ignore her when she tries to contact me again.