Try This Exercise to Help Get Over Your Ex
This is an effective strategy I used when I was going through a breakup as well as what I use with my clients. I call it the Counterthought Game. I figured I would post it here to try to help. Let me know if it works for you, even a little bit.
Whenever you catch yourself having an overly romanticized thought about your ex or the relationship, immediately follow it with a truthful counterthought beginning with the word “but.”
Here are some examples:
“I miss them… but I don’t miss constantly feeling anxious about where I stood.”
“They understood me so well… but they shut down every time we had difficult conversations.”
“The chemistry was intense… but the relationship was emotionally draining.”
“I felt so connected to them… but I often felt lonely in the relationship too.”
The point is to try to counter whatever positive and romanticized thought you have in the moment you have it.
