u/Hem0_G0blin

Hi there, I'm sorry if this isn't allowed. I'm not trying to take a survey or anything, I have serious concerns for my sister, and I figured a subreddit full of survivors might have good opinions on this.

See my sister has untreated ADD and has a hard time focusing on regular church sermons, so when she found a Pentecostal/revival church where there was constant moving and shouting, it helped her stay focused on the sermon.

Well she recently moved back down to my state, but is still 5 hours away, as her husband is military and will retire after this last station. My sister was very concerned about finding a good church when they moved, and so her pastor told her about a church in the area he's affiliated with and told her to check it out.

Well on her way to the church, she passed a sign in her neighborhood that led to a different church. A smaller one that's basically just for the neighborhood. She went to this one instead and found it was also a Pentecostal/revival style church, and so she figured since it was closer to home, she would just go to it instead.

She. Goes. There. Probably 4 days out of the week. The pastor just comes up with newer and crazier sermons and she doesn't shy to tell me about them and how wonderful he is at his job.

She gets so excited when she learns something new. She calls me and has to tell me all about it "Sister! Did you know we need to fully submit to our husbands?? That it doesn't matter how he acts and that since you are legally bound to him you just have to go along with it?? We as women are beneath man! It's incredible!"

>And yes, I'm aware we were made out of man therefore lower than him in the role of family but it clearly says in the Bible, RIGHT AFTER the part about women being submissive to their husbands, for the husbands to also be on the same page as their wives and respect them.

"We're more susceptible to demon possession, than men are, because we ate the fruit first! We should be praying daily over our heels because in the Bible it says "you will crush his head and he will strike your heel" so your heels are vulnerable to a demon entering that way!"

> First off. God said that to the snake. And the "He" in that statement is Jesus. It's said to be the very first prophecy spoken in the Bible and by God. Absolutely NOTHING was said about Eve's/women's heels.

Then the day her pastor made a spectacle out of the women in the church. He held up 5 envelopes and claimed they all had checks in them. 1 had $500 in it and the rest had $100. He asked who wanted them and whoever ran to the front first got them. My sister, along with quite a few other women, sprinted to the front. She got the envelope with $500.

All 5 women who got the checks stayed up front while the pastor said "Wow. Look at you all up here acting like this over money. When God should be the only thing you should run like that for." Then he revealed that all the checks were fake.

I can't tell if he's conditionIng the women of the church or if he's just a misogynist who uses sermons to pick on women?? He's married but I know that doesn't matter. Men can act completely different with their wives than they do other women.

My husband is a string bean. I absolutely love him, whatever size he is, but these days he looks like Dale or Boomhauer from king of the hill.

He's been thinking of his highschool days and how he used to have a rear end big enough that girls cat-called him in the hallways.

His aunt just gave him a bunch of jeans from her husband who's also pretty thin. They're the next size down from what he wears and so should sit perfect on his waist, but if he puts them on, he feels like that's accepting that he'll never grow out that area again.

Unfortunately c0vid took away all his muscle mass and he's been slowly getting it all back, but nothing will grow his @ss. Are there any workouts/diets I can help him get into, to help him build up weight and muscle back there?

Last night I (30F) went to a family game night. My cousin, Sheryl (35F) was there. She and i don't talk every day but ours is a relationship that, no matter how long we go without seeing each other, always reopens as though we talk constantly. I love her and would trust her with my life, and she's helped me through tons of relationship drama in the past.

And so l was surprised when, last night, she walked me to my car and broke down crying. When I finally got her to speak, she asked me what I thought of fantasies. I said I consider fantasies to be something you would never do but just think the idea of it is enthralling.

She then told me she found a second phone that belongs to her husband, Ronald. He's been using it to sext with ai chat bots. Chat bots he has convinced are underaged girls (maybe 15 to 17). When she confronted him, he said it's just a fantasy, he likes to play out. That he'd never actually do anything like in the texts. He also admits he's an addict.

I had no idea what to say in the moment, except that that's not ok. I told her she's welcome to come over and talk about it anytime she needs to. Then she did like she does best, and shut down the tears, put on a smile, and went back inside.

First off I absolutely hate ai.

Second, I don't think this counts as just a simple fantasy?? I don't think it's the same as steamy books, and here's why: books are simply read. You're not in the book. You're reading about others. Chatting with ai means you are freely interacting with it. You are the one in the scenario. Not some random character. And because of that you're making the same actions of a cheater, just without, what you'd think would be "real life consequences".

What is your opinion? Ai is so new and so dumb and, like I said, I don't like it. But would it be a deal breaker in your relationship if you caught your spouse doing this?

Edit:

Sorry I didn't bring more concern to the fact that even though it's ai, the underaged intentions are definitely alarming. I don't know how I'd feel about him coming to my house anymore. My husband and I have 3 kids under 10.

But my bigger concern, as I'm sure is Sheryl's also, is the fact that they share a duplex (townhouse) with her brother, Gary, who does have teen girls. And I know one of Sheryl's big concerns is that if she lets Gary know, things will go off the rails REAL FAST. See along with Gary, Sheryl has 2 other brothers, all of which would step in and beat Ronald's @ss in a heartbeat. And I think that might be too overwhelming for Sheryl to handle.

And on Sheryl leaving Ronald, I'm sure the fear of what Ronald's family might do worries her. He comes from money, and I'm sure she's scared that in the end his family will obviously take his side, and ruin Sheryl's life. Although they do love her and I'm curious how they'd react if she informed them of his little hobby.

They've been married for 20 years, with an 18 year old son. So if they do separate, son's old enough to make his own choices in this mess.

Whatever happens, it's going to go down fast and ugly.

I posted here earlier but took it down because considering my boss is an internet lurker he could probably find it and identify me with some of the words I used.

I work at a graphic design shop. We're not incredibly small, but we definitely don't get all the business: most being loyal clients who have been with us since the shop opened.

A few years after I joined the team, the original owner had to step down for medical reasons. She ended up selling to a guy we'll call Jeff.

Jeff's main goal is to make our shop the HOTTEST graphic design shop in the city/state. He is constantly going door to door with big companies hoping that we will be their new graphic designer. Yes, like he walks into corporate offices and headquarters without a meeting, hoping that his persistence and independent thinking will win them over.

But on top of that, he isn't happy with our smaller clients. He claims they're just taking up space that these bigger companies could be filling. He wants us to start charging them more, that way they move on and find a cheaper designer.

Of course we don't charge them more. Which technically is allowed since the previous owner still has some say in how the companies run, since she's only been out of the hot seat for 6 or 7 months now.

Anyway his big thing now is redesigning the shop website. He's obsessed with ai, which I feel like is any true graphic designer's worst enemy, and has been using it to help him build our new page.

And let me tell you: it's absolute garbage. Like you'd think it was a joke! The front page has some of our past projects, except instead of pulling up an actual image of what we did, he just remade it with ai!

And then to the "meet the crew" page, which was the whole point of this post:

I'm 5ft tall and not petite. I'm definitely not overweight but its more like my proportions were meant for a 5ft8 to 6ft tall girl. I also have long blonde hair that has natural mermaid waves, and also don't wear makeup.

This. guy.

He made me the average height of the rest of the crew. He straightened and cut my hair AND glamourized my skin! He took my freckles! He took away all of me and put up what he thought was a better person!

Did he think I wouldn't see the website?? Did he think I would see it and be excited that he made me look more "desirable"??

I'm so upset and am not entirely sure if there's anything I can do about it.

We don't have your typical grandma/granddaughter relationship, where she made baked goods, delicious food, and was the base of all the family morals and values (that was my fraternal grandma who's passed and I miss her very much). No my grandma was a wild woman as a teen-30s. She was married but neither she nor her husband were loyal. He was military and on a naval base in Australia, hooking up with many natives, while most other men were dying in Vietnam. Meanwhile, my grandma was hitting up all the local dance halls, with her sisters and meeting all the cowboys she could ever want.

I know all that because my grandma is a "stay up late with margaritas, and dish about everything" kind of grandma. Girl talk is her second language and nothing is off the table (except who my real grandpa is (she's probably taking that to her deathbed)).

Now her daughter, my aunt, bought her a house next to her, and so she lives 3 hours away. I visit every so often with my family, and we still have late night talks. But now she laments mostly about her body breaking down, her heart issues, and hollow bones. She's definitely not the woman she used to be. And I hate that I don't get to see her and reassure her more often than I do.

We text all the time. She likes doing that because it helps keep her eyes working and fingers working. I update her on my kids, and send her photos of the sunset from my house (I really do have a good set-up for beautiful sunsets.

But every once in a while, I'll get a text from her saying she made me an order at our local grocery store. She never tells me what she ordered, just a date, time, and confirmation number.

Sometimes it's a bunch of ingredients for a special dinner, sometimes is just a bunch of sweets for my kids, sometimes it's just basic groceries. But every time, my heart swelled, because she absolutely doesn't have to do this.

This week she sent me a picture of some onion cabbage rolls she made. I told her that I'd seen a recipe similar recently and really wanted to make them. So as a Mother's Day gift she ordered me all the ingredients to make them. Along with some sweets for my kids. I have to leave in a few minutes to go pick everything up, but even though I know what's in this grocery order, I'm still giddy like a child.

I love my grandma so much. Everyone please hug your grans and tell them you love them.