u/HexagonMind

I'm 34 and recently lost my two best friends. I'd known one for 11 years and the other for 20 years. I got caught in the middle of an argument between them and ended up losing both friendships.

The thing is they were pretty much my only friends. I don't really have anyone else I can call up or talk to about what's going on in my life.

It's a strange feeling to reach this age and realize how alone you are. I keep thinking about how long I've known these people and how suddenly I now have nobody I'm close to.

I'm posting because I'd really like to hear from anyone who's been in a similar position. If you've been in your 30s with no close friends or lost your entire social circle later in life I'd appreciate hearing your experience. I just want to feel a little less alone in this.

I’ve gamed for most of my life, although I play much less than I used to. It’s still a longtime hobby of mine, and I’m considering including a photo of my gaming setup on my dating profile.

I think it could show some personality and give someone an idea of one of my hobbies, but I also wonder if it could give the impression that I’m constantly gaming.

Would you include the setup photo, or use another photo of yourself instead? Why or why not?

TL;DR: 2+ years after surgery, physically fine but still experiencing cognitive and emotional changes. Has anyone else experienced this long-term?

I had a colloid cyst causing obstructive hydrocephalus that was surgically removed on 5/3/2024. I had a right frontal mini-craniotomy with intraventricular microsurgical resection and a right frontal external ventricular drain.

I started therapy later than I should’ve about 10 months after surgery and have continued since. Physically I feel completely fine, but mentally I still have days where I feel more down than I did before. I used to be very happy and optimistic, and now I feel more stressed, negative, and have much more negative self-talk and lower confidence.

I had neuropsych testing about a year after surgery that showed difficulties with processing speed, attention, verbal memory, verbal fluency, and executive functioning. The evaluator attributed these changes to the cyst, hydrocephalus, and surgery.

The months after surgery were also extremely stressful. My niece had a seizure in front of me and was hospitalized for a month while I was alone caring for my 3-year-old nephew, my grandma later broke her hip, and returning to work was overwhelming.

I’ve also struggled with dating and feeling alone. Before surgery, becoming a mom was the one major thing I felt I hadn’t accomplished, and I had been planning to pursue becoming a single mom by choice with a sperm donor. Now I’m 34 years old and that still hasn’t happened.

I’m now 2 years and 3 months out. I’ve heard mental/emotional recovery can take around 2 years. Has anyone else experienced lingering depression, negative self-talk, cognitive changes, or just not feeling like themselves this far out from surgery? Thanks in advance for reading and commenting it means a lot to me.

The few guys I have told have been okay with it just curious