u/Hot_Lack_4868

Isn't being seen as a potential partner better than being seen as a friend ? People do much more for their partners than they do for their friends. The reality is no one wants to be seen as unattractive. And one aspect of male and female friendship that most people don't talk about is that men find their female friends somewhat attractive at least, while most of their male friends are unattractive to women. So being seen as a friend sometimes means being seen as unattractive, and no one likes that. Also, some women equate a guy wanting a relationship with a guy just wanting sex from them. Is this how some women see relationships? As giving sex to men? Doesn't this show that women don't want relationships as opposed to the stereotype that men want sex and women want relationships?

I doubt there are any women on this sub, but I would like to hear your perspective on why being seen as girlfriend/wife material is considered so bad?

There's one pattern I've noticed, especially on Reddit. In subreddits based on loneliness, making new friends, posting your pictures for ratings, or being forever alone, it's almost always women who get far more engagement than male posters. It's not really their fault, nor am I blaming for them for it.

Just look at the picture I've shared. It's from a friendship group. All the top posts of the week are from women. So basically, even if you want to make friends with them online, you have to compete with hundreds of men and women in their DMs. Even if you have something in common with them, you're stuck in a queue, with a high possibility that they may not even see your DM. And you can't really expect them to read all of their DMs. It does seem like both men and women only want to interact with women. Even men ignore other men.

This can't be real right? It feels like a psyop to affirm all the redpill/incel stuff I've been seeing

I've been scrolling out of morbid curiosity and it feels real, but the content feels like the most delusional hypocritical bs only the incellyest incel can dream off

Women often say that attraction can grow over time, and if that's true, then why doesn't that apply to their male friends? Why is a friend confessing his feelings after being friends with them for a long time always seen in such a negative light?

They often say that he doesn't value her as a person and only sees her as a sex object. What? Why does wanting a relationship with someone mean you don't see them as a person? And how does the sex object argument make sense? If he's confessing your feelings, isn't this opposite of just wanting sex?

And I think, at some level, men find most of their female friends at least somewhat attractive. How does finding someone attractive mean you don't like them as a person? But if they stop being friends after rejection it means the friendship was never genuine. Again I don't understand this argument. Clearly, some of these women have never been rejected, and they don't know how it feels like to be rejected by someone and see them choose another person over you. It's better to cut your losses at that point. It doesn't mean that friendship wasn't genuine.

Also, because I think most men find their female friends at least somewhat attractive, when women develop feelings for their male friends, the attraction is more likely to be mutual. But when a male friend develops feelings, he's more likely to be rejected. Again, this suggests that women are the choosers in most, if not all cases.

Some guys are seriously coping if they believe AI can actually replace women in the future, with all these AI girlfriend apps popping up. AI can never give the kind of validation that a real woman can and that is being chosen over hundreds of other men. These apps aren't about replacing women. They provide companionship where there otherwise wouldn't be any

Even if AI becomes far more advanced and we reach the stage of human like androids, I still don't think AI will come close to replacing women in romantic relationships. Men are always competing with each other, and getting a woman is a sign of social status. Since women are not easy to get, being chosen by them means more. People don't respect what comes easily. This is also the reason why a guy getting a girlfriend or sleeping with multiple women is seen as an achievement by many people, because it isn't easy.

Also, I don't think men who can get women are going to choose AI over women. Some of them could get addicted to AI, just like some guys get addicted to porn while being in a relationship, but that doesn't mean they actually prefer it over women. Men just love women too much.

What I do think can happen is chatbots becoming extremely realistic, with a variety of women's voices, realistic image generation, and AI randomly texting you on its own like a normal person. I think it can be a good coping mechanism for guys who are lonely. Chatbots can be addicting.

Honestly, I think this is still better than sending money to random women, talking to yourself through women's DMs, engaging with escorts, subscribing to OF, and potentially chatting with men who manage those accounts. AI isn't replacing women in those men's lives because there were no women to begin with. It's just filling an empty spot.

Simp is that one group of men who are disliked by both men and women. Some men blame them for ruining dating, giving free attention to women while women blame them for having ulterior motives, or worse simply using them. But what makes men simp for women?

According to this post on reddit

https://np.reddit.com/r/psychology/s/hIQzYPOzGP

> The researchers suspected that some men use excessive displays of commitment as a compensatory strategy. If a man feels he lacks what researchers call “mate value,” which refers to his overall desirability based on traits like physical attractiveness and social status, he might pour excessive time and money into a romantic interest to make up for those perceived shortcomings.

With simps, the issue is that they don't have any options and since female attention is scarce (there's no scarcity of male attention for women) they use their money and time trying to win over women. It all comes down to not getting female attention and wanting any kind of validation. Men have to compete for female attention, and involuntarily single men are seen as the worst.

In the modern day, it's easier than ever to simp. It's easy to send money to some random woman online, and there are even websites that let you send gifts to women. In return, these women give you attention and make you feel special, creating parasiaocial relationship.

It's easy to laugh at simps, but you have to understand that being lonely and romantically invisible is not easy at all. Women cannot relate to this in the same way, so they don't understand. Simping can also manifest in the form of being a white knight and attempting to show themselves as one of the good guys.

Overall, it comes down to getting no female attention and feeling left behind. Female attention is scarce, and prolonged loneliness can make you do things that you wouldn't do otherwise. Men are definitely judged based on their success with other women, and there's this whole preselection thing too. Not being chosen over other guys and feeling like you're not good enough can affect your mental health and lead to low self esteem, depression and self destructive behavior.

I saw a post on another subreddit where the usual rhetoric was that men don't see women as people with their own subjective tastes and preferences, but instead see women as judges of men's value. The post was basically an exaggeration, but it got me thinking are women actually arbiters of men's worth? And is this something only men beleive, or do women reinforce this idea too?

Reddit is full of posts from men who are depressed and sometimes even suicidal, because they're virgins, haven't been in a relationship or can't get women. I've never seen such posts from women(unless they're lesbians). And honestly, I don't think women can relate to this experience. Male attention is available to women in abundance. They have no idea to what's it's like to go your entire life without getting any attention, affection or validation from the opposite sex.

On the surface, it may seems like it's all in those men's head, but you've got to remember that virgin, incel, bitchless etc are all used as insults against men. And women use this insults too, so clearly this isn't just something men believe.

Then there's preselection and the idea that a man being chosen by a woman means he's been "vetted" so he must have good qualities and must be safe. But does that make any sense? Women are supposed to have subjective tastes and preferences right? So how does one woman's decision to choose a man prove that he's a good person or safe? Not to mention that most violence against women is committed by their intimate partners. The very fact that preselection is treated as a thing is proof that women see other women are arbiters of men's value.

And look at how people portray the worse men. When women or other Redditors want to paint a man as a pathetic loser, his inability to her women almost always gets though up. And if he does get women, then suddenly he's paying for them. His ability to attract women is constantly used as evidence for or against his worth.

So in short whether you like it or not a man is always going to judged based on his ability to attract women. It's not something that's just in your head.

Source- Daily Nue's Exorcist