u/Idk311025

I don’t even know if you ever understood how much you affected me.

You came into my life, and for a moment it felt real. It felt like something was building. I let myself believe in it, I let myself care, and I even fought for it in ways I don’t usually do.

When you disappeared, I was left confused more than anything. Not just hurt, confused. Because there was no ending, no explanation, just silence.

Then you came back after weeks and said sorry. And for a moment, I thought maybe there was still something there, maybe we could talk, maybe we could understand what happened.
But when I finally told you how much you hurt me… you disappeared again.

That second silence hurt differently. It made me realize I wasn’t just dealing with someone who left, I was dealing with someone who couldn’t stay when things became emotionally real.

And I think that’s what I’m still trying to accept now.
I don’t hate you. I don’t even know if I’m still angry. Most days I just feel this mix of sadness and acceptance trying to fight each other. Because part of me still misses who I thought you were before all of this happened.

But I also know I deserved consistency. I deserved honesty. I deserved someone who wouldn’t only show up when it was easy.

I still think about you more than I want to admit. Not because I want you back, but because there’s still no closure in my head. Just unanswered questions that you never stayed to help me understand.

Maybe you were never meant to give me that closure.
So I’m trying to give it to myself instead.
Even if a part of me is still learning how.

I don’t even know if you ever understood how much you affected me.

You came into my life, and for a moment it felt real. It felt like something was building. I let myself believe in it, I let myself care, and I even fought for it in ways I don’t usually do.

When you disappeared, I was left confused more than anything. Not just hurt, confused. Because there was no ending, no explanation, just silence.

Then you came back after weeks and said sorry. And for a moment, I thought maybe there was still something there, maybe we could talk, maybe we could understand what happened.
But when I finally told you how much you hurt me… you disappeared again.

That second silence hurt differently. It made me realize I wasn’t just dealing with someone who left, I was dealing with someone who couldn’t stay when things became emotionally real.

And I think that’s what I’m still trying to accept now.
I don’t hate you. I don’t even know if I’m still angry. Most days I just feel this mix of sadness and acceptance trying to fight each other. Because part of me still misses who I thought you were before all of this happened.

But I also know I deserved consistency. I deserved honesty. I deserved someone who wouldn’t only show up when it was easy.

I still think about you more than I want to admit. Not because I want you back, but because there’s still no closure in my head. Just unanswered questions that you never stayed to help me understand.

Maybe you were never meant to give me that closure.
So I’m trying to give it to myself instead.
Even if a part of me is still learning how.

I don’t even know if you ever understood how much you affected me.

You came into my life, and for a moment it felt real. It felt like something was building. I let myself believe in it, I let myself care, and I even fought for it in ways I don’t usually do.

When you disappeared, I was left confused more than anything. Not just hurt, confused. Because there was no ending, no explanation, just silence.

Then you came back after weeks and said sorry. And for a moment, I thought maybe there was still something there, maybe we could talk, maybe we could understand what happened.

But when I finally told you how much you hurt me, you disappeared again.

That second silence hurt differently. It made me realize I wasn’t just dealing with someone who left,
I was dealing with someone who couldn’t stay when things became emotionally real.

And I think that’s what I’m still trying to accept now.
I don’t hate you. I don’t even know if I’m still angry. Most days I just feel this mix of sadness and acceptance trying to fight each other. Because part of me still misses who I thought you were before all of this happened.

But I also know I deserved consistency. I deserved honesty. I deserved someone who wouldn’t only show up when it was easy.

I still think about you more than I want to admit. Not because I want you back, but because there’s still no closure in my head. Just unanswered questions that you never stayed to help me understand.

Maybe you were never meant to give me that closure.
So I’m trying to give it to myself instead.
Even if a part of me is still learning how.

I guess being discarded really does hurt differently. This isn't my first heartbreak, but it is my first time being ghosted.

As far as I can remember, this was the first time I reached a point where I was literally grabbing my chest because of how much it hurt. It's been a couple of months since it happened. The pain isn't as heavy compared to the first two weeks, but it hasn't completely gone away either.

On the third week, he apologized, but he didn't really acknowledge my feelings. I just let it be and focused on myself, even though it felt like I was breaking into pieces.

Now, the pain doesn't come in heavy waves like before, but he's still on my mind every single day. Healing really isn't linear. These past few days have felt heavier, and I've dreamed about him a few times. Nothing significant, just brief moments where he shows up and then disappears.

It's really hard when you genuinely miss someone but can't do anything about it. All you can do is endure the feeling and keep moving forward with your life.

Iba pala talaga yung pain kapag na discard ka. This is not my first heartbreak, but being ghosted? Yes.

As far as I can remember, ngayon lang ako umabot sa point na I was literally grabbing my chest because of how painful it was. It's been a couple of months since it happened. Hindi na siya kasing bigat compared to the first two weeks, but it still lingers.

On the third week, he apologized, but he never really acknowledged the pain he caused. I just let it be and focused on myself, even though it felt like I was breaking into pieces.

People say healing isn't linear, and now I understand why. Some days I'm okay, and some days the sadness just hits out of nowhere. These past few days have been heavier than usual. I've even dreamed about him a few times not anything significant, just him appearing in passing.

What's hard is that I still miss him. Not enough to reach out, not enough to beg for answers, but enough to think about him every day. And that's the part I struggle with.

Missing someone while knowing there's nothing you can do except accept what happened and continue living your life.
I guess healing really means carrying the pain a little better each day, even when some days still feel heavier than others.

A couple of months later and I’m still trying to move on after being discarded. It’s not as heavy as the first few weeks when the pain was so intense I’d literally hold my chest just to calm myself down.

I already accepted that it’s over, but these past few days I’ve been missing him again. Not the way he left, but the person who once showed me why I fell in love with him in the first place.

Earlier around 3am, I suddenly woke up and the first thing on my mind was him. It felt so heavy, like someone pulled me out of my sleep just to remind me of what I lost. Maybe he was already on my mind before I slept, I don’t know.

What hurts the most is wondering how someone can sleep peacefully after hurting someone who genuinely loved them.