u/Ill-Double-5111

“I’m 19F, he’s 24M (Army). To everyone else he seems perfect calls me sweet names, says I’m the only one, tells people he trusts me completely. My friends are excited about our future and summer plans, thinking I’m so lucky.But in private it’s awful. He’s extremely possessive: says talking to other men = cheating, told me to avoid all guys, says I belong to him. He claims he only likes control in bed, but he controls everything my time, my emotions, what I do. He lets me talk to friends so he says he’s ‘not controlling’, but it feels like he owns me.

He’s hot & cold: one day the best, next day ignores me for days, texts one word, bails last minute to sleep or relax. He lied about getting STI tests & risked my health.

Recently I paid for everything for plans we had. He cancelled, messed up, owes me all the money. I got angry, told him he’s cut off, sent a long voice note — he never listened. Just sent ‘Morning sweetheart’ like nothing happened.

I sent my bank details asking for my money back. He replied patronisingly: ‘Awe good baby, I’ll check my phone as often as I can’ — completely ignored the money. He’s said nothing & sent nothing all day. Just ignoring me & keeping my cash.

He demands 100% loyalty & obedience from me, but treats me like trash, lies, neglects me & steals from me. I’m 100% loyal, pure & good to him, but I feel like dog shit. No one knows the truth, I have to smile & pretend everything’s fine.

Am I crazy? Is this normal? Or is he actually controlling & disrespectful?”

“I’m 19F, he’s 24M (Army). To everyone else he seems perfect calls me sweet names, says I’m the only one, tells people he trusts me completely. My friends are excited about our future and summer plans, thinking I’m so lucky.But in private it’s awful. He’s extremely possessive: says talking to other men = cheating, told me to avoid all guys, says I belong to him. He claims he only likes control in bed, but he controls everything my time, my emotions, what I do. He lets me talk to friends so he says he’s ‘not controlling’, but it feels like he owns me.

He’s hot & cold: one day the best, next day ignores me for days, texts one word, bails last minute to sleep or relax. He lied about getting STI tests & risked my health.

Recently I paid for everything for plans we had. He cancelled, messed up, owes me all the money. I got angry, told him he’s cut off, sent a long voice note — he never listened. Just sent ‘Morning sweetheart’ like nothing happened.

I sent my bank details asking for my money back. He replied patronisingly: ‘Awe good baby, I’ll check my phone as often as I can’ — completely ignored the money. He’s said nothing & sent nothing all day. Just ignoring me & keeping my cash.

He demands 100% loyalty & obedience from me, but treats me like trash, lies, neglects me & steals from me. I’m 100% loyal, pure & good to him, but I feel like dog shit. No one knows the truth, I have to smile & pretend everything’s fine.

Am I crazy? Is this normal? Or is he actually controlling & disrespectful?”

I 19F am very excited to lose my virginity to my 23M boyfriend this year however i don’t know am still kinda scared of things like oh will my body look the same , i don’t wanna Hv a bad smell cause Hv heard some women develop bad smells . My boyfriend also wants me to go on the pill but like ion know Ion wanna experience the side effects of those things . Guys I need advices..Ps hv never really had sexual education so any advice helps

I 19F am very excited to lose my virginity to my 23M boyfriend this year however i don’t know am still kinda scared of things like oh will my body look the same , i don’t wanna Hv a bad smell cause Hv heard some women develop bad smells . My boyfriend also wants me to go on the pill but like ion know Ion wanna experience the side effects of those things . Guys I need advices..Ps hv never really had sexual education so any advice helps

"Hi everyone, 19F here. I’m a virgin and planning on having sex for the first time soon with my bf (23M). We’ve been together 4 months. He’s more experienced and quite dominant/touchy. I’m getting my STI tests and looking into BC, but I’m nervous about the actual act. Any tips on positions, managing pain, and making sure he’s satisfied while I stay safe? I really want this to be special. Thanks

"Hi everyone, 19F here. I’m a virgin and planning on having sex for the first time soon with my bf (23M). We’ve been together 4 months. He’s more experienced and quite dominant/touchy. I’m getting my STI tests and looking into BC, but I’m nervous about the actual act. Any tips on positions, managing pain, and making sure he’s satisfied while I stay safe? I really want this to be special. Thanks

I'm 19, he's 23. He ignores me for days, is possessive, avoids serious conversations by being overly affectionate then acts normal quickly. He lectures me on communication but doesn't practice it. I'm stressed and disrespected.

I’m 19 and this is my first relationship. My boyfriend is 23, says he’s dating to marry, but lately his behaviour has me confused.

He ignores me for days at a time. We haven’t spoken properly since Thursday, he went out of town and didn’t come see me like he said, and today is a holiday and he hasn’t texted me at all.

He is very possessive, says he wants to “own” me and gets mad if I speak to other guys.

When I try to tell him I’m upset or vent about his behaviour, the moment he sees me he switches into “baby mode”. He kisses me and repeats sorry loads before I even finish speaking so I can’t explain properly. Then less than an hour later he’s acting normal and sexual again like nothing happened, without even waiting for me to forgive him.

He also lectures me on communication but disappears when he wants to.

I’m stressed, my period is late, and I feel so disrespected. I’ve been so loyal to him but he treats me like an option.