u/InappropriatePea

My husband asked for separation this morning. I’m spiraling. I’m staying at a friend’s place until I can properly move and she’s out of town so I’m by myself with my thoughts.

(He’s by himself too except he’s unbothered and was happily playing video games when I left)

I need something to take my mind off the deep desire to be a danger to myself. Tv shows maybe? Please send recommendations, or send a dm and keep me company. I left my whole life and country for him and he discarded me in less than two years. I need help.

I’ve been deep in the rabbit hole of fish keeping and betta care for a couple months now. I used to have fish years ago but was part of the old school of thought and am trying to do the very best I can for whatever fish I decide to get.

Something I haven’t heard much about on any of the subs I frequent is UV filtration. There’s conflicting info online (the internet has something for everyone 🙃).

I’m particularly curious because the people who love it swear by it for the health of their fish. It got me thinking, I see a hundred posts a day about sick bettas in tanks with textbook parameters. Could it be that UV filtration could circumvent a lot of the bacterial/fungal overgrowth that ends up being a silent killer?

Lemme know if I’m misunderstanding what I’ve been reading. And let me know your take on the use of UV, it’s actual measurable benefits and whether you’d recommend it.

I moved countries, left my family and all my friends, left most of my belongings. I did all that just to be with him. And here we are, less than two years later, he treats me like garbage.

From day one of me moving here to be with him he has treated me like I don’t deserve him. And maybe I don’t. I’m not smart, I’m not beautiful, I have no money. But I thought he loved me. And that makes me the fool because who could ever love me.

I’ve always suffered from depression but I thought I finally had someone I could depend on when things get bleak. Instead he just ignores me on the hard days.

I’m in a foreign land where I have no support and nobody to talk to or turn to. And now the person I thought was my rock is going to discard me.

I’m shattered and I don’t know what to do.

Hey, I’m new here. New to the sub and new to the diagnosis. If I’m not following the protocol please let me know.

As an autistic person, I have noticed that justice sensitivity as a ‘symptom?’ gets in the way a lot of the time. I’m not a ‘goody two shoes’ by any means, I’ve been described as a rebel. But I am rigid when it comes to defending my boundaries, the boundaries of others, the rights of those who can’t speak up for themselves. Not to say neurotypical people do not possess the ability to stand up for what they believe. But I can feel myself being entirely unyielding. And it affects my ability to have long term close connections. Inevitably, we will disagree, and I will not back down. Then I’m left feeling alone again simply because I cannot let it go when I feel like someone is being unjust or unfair.

I am suffering in my marriage, in friendships, struggling to make new friends in my adulthood (due to many things but this is a big part of it). I don’t want to lose the part of myself that speaks up when things are unjust, but I can feel myself trying to press mute whenever I feel like I could lose connection with someone over it.

I’ve been a preschool teacher for 15 years now and I’ve had so many hilarious conversations with my students over that time. There have also been sort of spooky things they’ve said, downright insightful epiphanies we’ve shared.

Got me thinking it would be so fun to talk with other teachers, or anyone really, who also has some of these crazy chats with their students/kids.

So please share them with me!

Hey, I’m new to paludariums/ terrariums. I have a 10g tall that I’m considering making partly paludarium, partly fish tank. But I don’t know where to start with the terrestrial aspect.

I didn’t see any stickied guides (which I’m assuming is just because these things are hard to condense into a how to). So I wondered if there’s resources where I can find like, beginner plant lists or, best practice guides etc. Lemme know if I’m being too precious about this and I just have to raw dog the process and see what comes out. 😅

Why is it so impossible to find tank stands online? Am I searching the wrong things? I have a 10 gallon column tank and just am absolutely stumped as to where to find an appropriate stand.

Unfortunately, this morning I arrived to work to him passed away in his tank. I can’t say I’m surprised, once you’ve seen death, you can recognise it. Yesterday when I tried to feed him I just felt it in my gut that he was about to go.

I don’t have much else to say except that I’m sorry.