u/Individual-Bee1497

While those corporate fat cats are out enjoying that brand new Zuca cart and extra 12-packs, my two will be at home tightening the ol belt loop an extra few notches. Oh and by the way since I sure as hell don’t have new belt money, I’ll be the one making those extra notches extra tight for you. Hope you sleep a little better at night, knowing two boys won’t be eating for a week. You make me sick.

Oh and by the way this isn’t about the money, it’s about the principle. When you do these price hikes, you’re hurting the people who actually play and enjoy this sport. Money don’t grow on trees. That extra $5 sure as hell ain’t coming out of my disc budget. You’re not taking this sport away from me.

So since that money has to come from somewhere, we’ll start cutting costs elsewhere. Oh sure I’d love to buy the kids that happy meal but now I can’t. All we can afford now is gas to the dumpster for scraps. I’ve heard fighting raccoons for garbage is a great way for 8-year olds to build character.

So I hope you’re happy. I hope the courses stay “maintained” and “cared for.” I hope you relish in the pain you’re trying to cause. Well guess what. You’re not gonna be hurting me. You’re hurting innocent children. So I hope the money is worth it I really do. But I do really hope if there’s still a shred of humanity left in you to just take a moment to really think about what you’re doing and who this is affecting. Some things are just bigger than a game.

TLDR: not all aces are equal and the type of ace one obtains should dictate the celebration response.

Hey guys, I wanted to make this guide as a way to bridge the experience gap and hopefully offer beginners better insight into etiquette as they progress through this sport they may not be aware of if they’ve never had exposure. Many people who frequent this sub are already disc golf experts, so just please keep in mind that this content is geared towards those with low knowledge.

What is an ace?
This is incredibly common knowledge so I’m not going to explain it. If you don’t know yet, this sport is not for you.

Seriously? I just started playing.
Exactly, and I’m not going to spoon feed you information that you could discover with a 10 second google search. If you can’t do that, this sport is not for you.

Are there discs that are better suited for aces?
Yes, there are but you need to go and figure that out for yourself.

Can anybody ace?
In theory yes but in practice, no. There’s a lot of shitty disc golfers who will probably only dream of one when they could achieve with proper form and instruction.

I just got an ace! Can I celebrate?
Yes and no. You see, they are not all created equally, despite having the same term. How you celebrate, especially when in a group, can have major ramifications on if people think you’re a dumbfuck or not.

Below will be the comprehensive list of when you should or should not celebrate. I do need to sincerely apologize to any Eurotrash who may read this as I only used metric when my ex-wife would ask me to measure my length; otherwise, I strictly use American numbers, so figure out the conversions yourselves.

What aces can’t I celebrate?

1. Any ace 100 feet or less.
2. Any ace 150 feet or less.
3. Any ace 200 feet or less.
4. Any ace 250 feet or less.
5. Any ace when you’ve been throwing a bag of discs at one hole back-to-back.
6. Any “ace” that occurred during a solo round.
7. Any ace 283 feet or less.
8. Any ace 285-300 feet.
9. Any ace 350 feet or less.
10. Any ace 400 feet or less.
11. Any ace 450 feet or less.

What aces can I celebrate?

1. Any ace 284 feet in length.
2. Any ace 451 feet or further.

How should I celebrate?
Before I go further, because I have a feeling not everyone will follow this - if your ace falls in the “Can’t Celebrate” category, you should not feel accomplished and you should not be celebrating. If you sit on a toilet long enough, shit is bound to come out. That’s all your ace is. I think a raised eyebrow is sufficient but anything above that is shameless vanity. These shots are very standard, you’re not reinventing the wheel.

My ace was in the “Can Celebrate” category. What is the proper etiquette?
Anything goes. Get drunk. Smoke a blunt. Get behind the wheel of your car for a joyride. Crash your car. Get out to check for any injuries. Get back in your car. Crash it again. The possibilities are limitless. They’re also very lenient on your first DUI so don’t let that scare you. Getting an ace is truly is the pinnacle of the sport. Essentially every single moment after this will be worse than the feeling and moment you’re in now.

Why is 284 feet in the “Can Celebrate” category?
Speaking from personal experience, I know how difficult this distance is. As someone who typically throws 400-500 feet on average, I really had to take a lot off my shot to not over throw. Plus the hyzer I threw was in-line with the ideal flight path, so the combination of the strength pullback and disc angle reflected an incredibly high level of skill to achieve.

To beginners, I hope this helps. Remember, this list is comprehensive and exhaustive, so there are no exceptions. While this unfortunately is not yet codified, I promise that if elected to the PDGA Global Board, getting this list written into the PDGA by-laws would be my first step so we can start holding people accountable. I have already started a list of punishments for those who go outside of the Celebration Guidelines but will defer its release until we have gotten this passed. If there are any questions about this matter, I’d recommend going back to the top and starting reading again from the top because it’s pretty fucking clear.

When you see people in line at the DMV, do you go to the person in front of you and ask “Mind if I go ahead of you?” No, you don’t, unless you’re a complete asshole. The disc golf course should be no exception. And I’m getting real sick of these entitled, solo pricks who expect a “front of the line” handout from the rest of us. These people are probably all on welfare, so they’re just used to free shit all the time. It’s sickening. Can you not just wait? Do you need the instant gratification of going first?

What the hell happened to our country? Back in my day, you would never ask to play through. If you did, you can bet your ass you’d come back to slashed tires in the parking lot, smashed out back windows and everything. We handled it like men.

But now we’ve lost all courtesy and respect in this society. I know times have changed, but I wish they didn’t.

So to the next solo incel who wants to barge up on me, the answer is no. I will not let you play through. My group of 8 is going to take our sweet time and actually enjoy ourselves, unlike you. I’m not letting my muscles go cold just to watch you shank your drive off the teepad. How about you sit and watch the real men play and maybe you’ll learn a thing or two.

Yesterday my cousin and I were ripping drives off hole 1 before starting our round. An older guy comes up to us and tells us he’s going to join us. I wanted to say no because I hate when people do shit like that, but he had a look in his eye and i felt a little scared to say no, so we tell him sure.

We play the first couple holes and all is, well…the guy can disc, I’d give him that. Lay ups, birdies, the whole sha-bang. A few holes in, when he birdied on a long C3 putt, he ripped his shirt off and left it off the rest of the round. He also started blasting his Bluetooth speaker, but when I asked if he could turn it down a hair, he just said that’s something he won’t ever do and to not ask him to do it again.

Anyways we keep playing, and he’s still absolutely shredding the course. On 18, he asks if we’ve ever heard Josh Anthon. We said no, never heard of him. Turns out this guy was Josh Anthon, a former pro sponsored by Innova!

At that point I was star struck, I’ve never spoken to a former pro disc golfer before. He seemed really cool, even gave us a couple of roadies before we left. Not only did he pose for pictures, he even gave us a little tour of his RV, or as he said, “This is where the magic happened.” It certainly wasn’t a new one and judging by the fender, had seen better days. But I was just in awe as I’m thinking all the tournaments he’d gone to, cities visited, and people/pros that probably entered that RV over the years.

As we said our goodbyes, Josh told us good luck and continue to be proud of ourselves because it’s not racist to be proud. So I guess I just wanted to share the awesome experience I ended up having and just want to make sure the disc golf community gives him some love.

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