u/InfamousBox6446

Am I selfish for choosing to go with my mom after so many years?
For context, my dad, my brother, and I left my mom six years ago when I was still a kid. I never got to choose who I wanted to go with. My dad made that decision for us and took us with him. My mom always tried to contact my brother and me, but my brother didn’t want to talk to her. I did want to talk to her, but I was simply too scared because I knew how my dad would react.
My mom and dad did not end their relationship on good terms. When they were together, they would always argue in front of me and my siblings. One day, my dad decided to pack my brothers’ and my things and leave my mom and my three other siblings behind. I was a kid, so I didn’t really have a say in any of it.
Recently, my mom followed me on TikTok. For the first time, I felt like I was old enough to decide for myself whether I wanted to talk to her or not. I chose to talk to her. After six years, I finally got to see my mom again, and I was so happy. I stayed at her house for a couple of days without my dad knowing, and honestly, that was the happiest I’ve been in a while.
At my mom’s house, it feels like a true family. They have amazing Christmases, amazing birthdays, and they all gather together and watch movies. Everyone spends time together, and I got to experience the kind of family environment I had been missing for years.
Here with my dad, it’s the complete opposite. We live with my aunts, but I barely talk to them. I haven’t really celebrated my birthday since we left. No one makes a big deal about my birthday, tells me happy birthday, or throws me a party. My aunts invite my cousin and her husband over for Christmas, but I can never go downstairs because my dad doesn’t let me. He’s usually in his room, and I’m also not close with my aunts, so I just stay in my room.
I feel like I don’t really talk to anyone except my dad. I’m in my room alone all day. Since my brother moved out, I don’t really have anyone. I’m not close with him either because he’s mean to me, so I feel like I’ve been alone for a long time.
Yesterday, I finally told my dad that I had been talking to my mom. He reacted really badly. He called me a bunch of names and got extremely angry. Later, he calmed down, but then he started making me feel like I had to choose between him and my mom all over again. He was trying to manipulate me and even went as far as saying that if I left, something bad would happen to him.
He called my brother over, and the two of them started saying things about my mom that I don’t believe are true. My brother was calling me trash and saying a bunch of hurtful things. Both my brother and my dad kept telling me that I’m a different person since I started talking to my mom. They also said that my mom is going to make me her maid if I move in with her.
But I don’t believe that. My mom has already shown me so much love. In the short time I’ve been able to reconnect with her, she has given me a kind of love and connection that I feel like I’ve been missing for the past six years. She has even told me that she would never stop me from talking to my dad. She wants me to go with her, and honestly, I want to go with her too.
I don’t want to hurt my dad, and I don’t want to feel like I’m betraying him. But I also don’t want to spend my life feeling like I have to choose between my parents. I didn’t choose to leave my mom six years ago. I was a child, and that decision was made for me.
Now I’m older, and for the first time, I feel like I have a choice in what kind of relationship I want with my mom.
So am I selfish for wanting to go with my mom? Am I making the wrong choice, or am I finally making a choice for myself?

I’ve struggled with binge eating/overeating for as long as I can remember. I’m a teenager, and I’m overweight. I’ve heard the jokes, the comments, and the “you have such a pretty face” remarks more times than I can count. I’m tired of it.
Food has always been my way of coping with emotions. I’ll eat when I’m stressed, sad, or bored, and afterward I just feel guilty and disappointed in myself. I’ve tried dieting so many times, but I always end up telling myself, “I’ll start tomorrow,” and tomorrow never comes.
Recently, during a sports physical, they found protein in my urine. I know that doesn’t automatically mean it’s because of my weight, but it was a wake-up call for me to start taking my health seriously.
This time, I don’t want to lose weight because of what other people think or because I want someone to like me. I want to do it because I want to be healthy. I don’t want to spend my teenage years constantly comparing myself to other girls or feeling trapped by my eating habits. I want to build a healthier relationship with food and with myself.
For anyone who has recovered from binge eating or emotional eating, what helped you? How did you stop the cycle of saying “I’ll start tomorrow”? What habits made the biggest difference?
I’d really appreciate any advice or encouragement. Thank you for reading.

I’ve struggled with binge eating/overeating for as long as I can remember. I’m overweight. I’ve heard the jokes, the comments, and the “you have such a pretty face” remarks more times than I can count. I’m tired of it.
Food has always been my way of coping with emotions. I’ll eat when I’m stressed, sad, or bored, and afterward I just feel guilty and disappointed in myself. I’ve tried dieting so many times, but I always end up telling myself, “I’ll start tomorrow,” and tomorrow never comes.
Recently, during a sports physical, they found protein in my urine. I know that doesn’t automatically mean it’s because of my weight, but it was a wake-up call for me to start taking my health seriously.
This time, I don’t want to lose weight because of what other people think or because I want someone to like me. I want to do it because I want to be healthy. I don’t want to spend my teenage years constantly comparing myself to other girls or feeling trapped by my eating habits. I want to build a healthier relationship with food and with myself.
For anyone who has recovered from binge eating or emotional eating, what helped you? How did you stop the cycle of saying “I’ll start tomorrow”? What habits made the biggest difference?
I’d really appreciate any advice or encouragement. Thank you for reading.