u/Inherentlyher

If there is something I love doing, it is starting an argument, especially at random moments, like "the earth is flat, prove me wrong." I love doing it with the people I'm closest to. Each time my friends hear me come up with one they huff, because despite everything, I am a sore loser. A competitive opponent, but the truth is, I just love stimulating their brains. I love playing dumb to provoke them, we laugh at it though.

They'll tell me to do something and I will say "I don't understand," they will say it in other languages till we get to gibberish and laugh it off.

I am not an addict, but boy, I am hooked on the dopamine rush and giddish excitement of texting someone to give them some hot tea, to share a snippet of your life.

A few months ago, I loved sending little pic snippets of my day to that person. It's interesting though, some flames just burn for a night. I don't take that much pictures but I do. I still have my late night phone calls. It's quite comical. I want to lay start struck in bed look at the celling listen to someone breath as I write and read. Literally darling breathe in and out. The exictement of reading that new book by my favorite author.

Play Apocalypse by Cigarettes After Sex and let's catch a quick smoke at the balcony. Bad habits I can't shake off. Embassy, maybe just a polite slow one, a stimulating conversation. for the one that got away.

Let's rock life.

I once watched this interview on, I think, IG. And so, that old woman was asked why do people marry; she said, "to be seen." I couldn't agree more. Beyond marriage, people crave to be understood, that's why they spiral. People crave to have a witness to their life. I never used to understand companionship until I sat down with this guy and he told me about it, and I spent time with him kidogo nkaunderstand what everyone used to tell me before.

Amor fati. People tune in and out of season beautifully.

Do you crave to be known not by the world, but to yourself and an individual? I call it a privilege. To be known is to be acknowledged, to be seen for who you are.

I saw some guys complaining that their girlfriends were no longer feminine because they let loose and farted too around them, adding weight,not the petite babe they met etc. What's the point of it if you can't let loose? Some guys too spoke up and said they can't let their guard down; Delilahs take them out with collected memories of vulnerable moments etc.

I hope you find people that allow you to be seen, but most importantly, I hope you see yourself, fall in love with you. I hope you meet strangers who make you fall in love with yourself and life, who challenge your beliefs and build you. I found my coffee sister; I hope you find yours.

Amor fati. I love my short-lived adventures with my beautiful strangers. Life is bitter; lemme savor an orange, a short chaser, to make it sufferable.

Someone might tell me to get out of my head. I love delusions if they make me forget the taste of life like sand in my mouth.

Bloom stranger, tomorrow, tomorrow isn't persay promised.

CREATE GOOD MOMENTS FOR BAD MOMENTS ALWAYS PRESENT THEMSELVES.

​Today, I made the mistake of leaving before grabbing a snack. I now understand when Ywaya Tajiri sang, "Kungoja kuliko chai ya saa kumi." Unlike him I was waiting for a snack.

​My stomach was earnestly waiting for chai ya saa kumi. It’s funny how when you are busy, you hardly think about food, but the moment you sit , ukiketi tu hivi, hunger and you become good friends. They merge into a bumblebee in your stomach.

​I now understand the significance chai ya saa kumi holds in our society.

Wageni wakipitia wanakunywa chai ya saa kumi ya kushikiila tumbo.

I have developed a problem with ego games and the ghosting, too. I've danced to these tunes when I had enough momentum, but hats off to people who actually communicate clearly and effectively.

A good soldier knows when to retreat, when to lock in on the target and load their gun. (ik yk hatuyuko war zone, I ain't talking about soldiers).

It feels like a game, a facade.

Bring back the art of laying yourself bare,

not just nude.

I did something wrong.

I have lost consciousness of wrongdoing at some point. I did something that was morally wrong, basically I became what I hated for a moment. (It wasn't cheating, by the way).

Guilt didn't eat me up at first, and that had me thinking: can you actually program your brain for a minute to do something wrong without guilt eating you? I realized the wrong and acknowledged it, but I finally understood what they mean when they say you are only sorry you got caught. I didn't get caught but I think it would be something like that if I did.

I only realized how bad it actually was after telling a friend. He was just like, "Sheesh, that's shitty," and we had that we listen, we don't judge moment. I'm no saint, no one is, but have you ever done something wrong and the guilt just didn't eat you up properly ?

No one ik is flawless, man is to error. That doesn't justify a lot.

I remember stealing some ground nuts when we were young but even then I felt guilty. Hii siku everything went down I think I was onto a dopamine rush.

Mortality ?¿

A song that fits you or rather a song that gets to you.

I cannot seem to find one only.

Do you find them intriguing. Was yours given to you by Reddit or did you pick it.

Do you pay attention to them, I think some people have lovely usernames.

Temme how you got yours.

To be seen for the beauty of your mind is so rich to me.

I'm a F in her 20s.

Imma be brief , I'm looking for someone.

Ok someone to listen to. I'll read it.

A nerd Maybe. I love, listening to nuggets,wewe usiniambie niskize podcast na documentaries nmetoka huko.

I believe in stirring connections with strangers.

27 +. All are Welcome. Bi, Strait, Trans. Friends Maybe.

​Imma call it networking.

Nmekaa tu hivi nkakumbuka nshai tumia mtu thirst trap kwa dm (nilikuwa nmeiva heh, I just came across that video today ) haha . Heh he asked me are you horny nkanyamaza. I never deleted the message nilikuwa narudi hapo nijikumbushe msichana you lost your gangster points. The nigga texted asking me to resend hio view once lkn bro bro we used to talk but idk what I was thinking io siku LOL . If I had a small head I would say I was using it.

Saa zingine ni ngumu. 😂 Like cmon dude you are too rigid even if I expect to meet a rigid member.

That's what I labeled myself after having this dialogue with my bestie. The idea of him is much more dangerous than the existence of him. A figment of my imagination, that's what it was. I couldn't seem to let go of that image. That was the hardest bit. After my analysis, I came to a conclusion that I am a delusional babe, and fuck it. Once is an accident, twice is a pattern. It had been eating me up. When they say being self-aware helps with nothing, I completely get it, for the awareness didn't lessen the impact of my spiraling, or the 'touch grass mamaa moment that hit me during random times of the day. It did get better, but I hated my mind for a minute. It felt like a psychological lesson, not an out-of-body experience, because I didn't have my uvs on

Three months ago, I got off a phone call with this guy who asked me, "So, you said you want to date. What are you looking for in a man?" For a minute I was lost of words because for everything I said he found a way to counter attack.

​So, I went and wrote down the things I thought I was looking for. Today, I was going through the list and had to remove some of them. I had written down "dominance" and "a man who can lead." ​I had to ask myself, ni kambi naanza, ama? A man like Gatsby or Mr. Darcy? Both are toxic smh. Babe, wake up, they are fiction. Touch grass.

You need to teach someone how to love you.

​The truth is, when we talk about partners and dating, the majority of us don't really know what we want yet because we are still self-discovering. Self discovery doesn't really cancel out the knowing fragments of what you want, though.

I was talking to a friend today and somehow we talked of love. She told me of how she stole some kittens to gift her then crush. He still left her.

​I remember how my sister was so blind in love when she experienced her first love. Huyo mwanaume nilikuwa namshikia sumu, she acted like a wife and mum to him. These girls all knew wanamaliziana kwa altar. I think every young naive one needs an older one to tell them to hold strong and not fall.

​My cousin got babies to make the guy like her. She got a girl after a boy, lakini bado the heart wants what it wants. That man is your undoing, not Romeo. Actually look for your Mr. Darcy hapa Nairobi huwezi vumbi ya kite.

​From "how many kids do you want" to "I curse the day I met you." ​Craziest thing I was about to do was to travel two counties away to see him, nkaona I chill out kiasi.

Nmeisha! 😂 Recently, my mum’s home church had a Pastor's Sunday. She told me how every Sunday, the pastor would go up to the podium and tell them to bring money because there was something he wanted to buy. 😂 I asked, 'Kwani kuna mtu anamzuia abuy? Si anunue.'

​Today I was seeing thw videos from the special day. The pastor gave a speech saying, 'Nawashukuru nyote ata kwa umaskini wenyu mmejituma, kuna kanisa mingi maskini,' and a lot of other bullshit. 😂😂 I'm done!

He really said, 'Unampelekea 500 bob afanye nini? ety leta ata 1000' Kama huna pesa, pia wewe unaomba watu, unaexpect nini from us? Fanya kazi, stop disturbing netizens! ​I told my mum to simply sit it out, juu hizi ni nini?

African pastors na audacity wacha tu.