u/Initial-Brain-5745

But violence consumes me. The Biter must be squished.

I had a dream that I was testing the new Trial: the Office Party. Coyle for some reason is the PA. There's a ton of side objectives, like demolishing snow men even though it's a summer office party (this will become relevant later).

At certain points I get locked in a room with an arcade style 'gun' that shoots... jelly stress balls? to pop balloons in order to go forward. I cannot open the very heavy metal doors keeping me in, but Coyle can, so I have to shoot balloons for my life and politely encourage Coyle to stop opening the door with bricks and jelly stress balls.

I'm continuing on, pissed at Murkoff for making me do such a harrowing yet pointless task, wondering what they wanted me to learn from that, when I realize it's just meaningless grunt work with your boss breathing down your neck. So just like a real office.

I reach the office proper. Things are a bit strange. My 'coworkers' stare too long, there's guys in white dress shirts seemingly patrolling, but it's not too strange. I repeat it on higher difficulties before I finally get to psychosurgery, and...

Things have gone tits up. Everyone's lost their mind, including me. The workers have blood on them from somewhere. There's a lot fewer of them. The whiteshirts have literal Coyle batons and are yelling out my position to Coyle and occasionally vanishing right before my eyes. Coyle's either ignoring them or even worse, they're just an insane figment of my imagination.

I'm terrified, and naturally start to run to the exit. I turn to make sure no one's chasing me... and I see it.

The Jaeger. She's slowly ambling towards me in a Hawaiian shirt (summer party, remember?)... with a platter of hors d'oeuvres. Instead of running away, I'm so confused I'm rooted in place. Does Murkoff want me to run towards her to get my snacks? Or run the hell away because the Jaeger will murder me with her bare hands? But said bare hands are occupied, and she wouldn't risk dropping precious Murkoff snacks to kill me, right?

I keep going back and forth, ignoring the giant murder cyborg with questionable fashion choices getting closer to me. I get so worked up over the question of whether Murkoff wants me to have snacks that the excitement wakes me up.

I laugh at the utter ridiculousness of it. Then I longed to be in the office party again.

"Easterman hasn't given me a novel with a SINGLE pegging scene in a whole YEAR. When the Escape attempt goes down I am hunting him down through the vents and killing him with my bare hands."

-Nurse Bar-swol

(Art from here: https://www.deviantart.com/raphtor/art/Shirtless-Kylo-Ben-Swolo-722003861)

Inspiration from this post.

Poor guy. Jeez.

I have done Psychosurgery. I've dealt with Night Hunters. I've avoided the Jaeger. But nothing has terrified as much as THIS.

Gooseberry has multiple... tanning racks... throughout the Orphanage (pictured: Cleanse the Orphans). Holy hell.

Avellanos got hold of the budget so now Easterman has to cut back to save up for new torture devices.

Is them taking the time to depict a random Murkoff scientist freaking out at the Escape alongside more plot important characters like Amelia and Henrietta.

The CCB (not going to define the acronym, thank you very much) decoration depicts the Warden with chest hair at the time of the photograph. Locksock the Warden has the Warden hairless.

This is so Murkoff could slide him down corridors easily, like a seal or somethin', ya know, to save transportation costs.