u/Intrepid_Pin8028

For the past year I’ve been dealing with horrendous stomach pain and severe diarrhoea. The pain comes in contraction like waves and the pain is white hot, all I can do all day is lay in agony, and all food seems to go through me immediately. It feels like my stomach is burning or on fire. I also feel very nauseous and get chest pains. I’ve lost a lot of weight recently too. My anxiety has gotten worse, and I’m wondering if this sudden physical pain could be just anxiety symptoms. I initially thought it was IBS, I haven’t been diagnosed but I had a stool and blood test and they ruled out anything serious. The weird thing which is making me think it’s anxiety is it only happens when I’m stressed, other than that my stomach is perfect. Last time this happened was recently was when I left a toxic relationship, almost the whole time I knew them my stomach was bad like I described weeks on end. And there was one time
I was shouted at because I couldn’t understand a game and immediately had to leave to relieve myself on toilet. But as soon as I cut ties, it got immediately better. It’s been fine since until yesterday night. I’m going to meet a co-worker and I haven’t been outside in ages and I suddenly felt nervous which surprised me. But now I’m in pain again and I don’t know if this is a coincidence. I’ve had bad physical symptoms before when my hands felt like they were on fire during a panic attack. What does this seem like and what can I do? During these times I eat very plain and gentle food (rice, fermented yogurt), but it seems eating anything is bad. As a result I’m often dehydrated no matter how much I drink. This has been a really embarrassing and painful problem :(

I bought a £9 belt off Depop and it still hasn’t arrived. It’s been 22 days, but on the seller’s profile they said it should take 4 days. They also have no refunds. First weird thing I noticed was when I bought the belt, they didn’t take it off immediately. I’m used to purchasing things and it immediately says: SOLD. Nope. It stayed up for few days. I think they’re a scammer but I’m not sure as this was my second order from website so maybe that’s a normal glitch? I raised an issue but I think theres nothing I can do. I noticed other recent bad reviews too. They’re in the UK and so am I, don’t see why it should take 22 days! Did I get scammed?

(I cut contact completely yesterday.) About four months ago, I was looking for people to play games with. We were in the same Discord group, and he reached out to me first. We clicked instantly. We liked the same things, shared similar ideologies, and had almost identical tastes. He was 31, and I was 21.

At first, I wasn’t intending to get into a relationship. His age and the fact that we’d never met in person were major factors. But we started voice and video chatting every day, and things moved quickly—too quickly.

In the beginning, he told me he preferred taking the long road and not rushing things sexually because of past relationships. However, the very next day, he asked me for nudes. And continued to pressure me into doing sexual favours for him. I regret that part because I wasn’t ready, I know that’s on my head for lying to myself. but I’m trying to be kind to myself too because I had no experience with situations like this. I’m trying to see it as a life lesson.

The relationship wasn’t entirely bad. There were many good moments. We talked about deep subjects, spent hours playing games without noticing the time, and stared into each other’s eyes during video calls. I thought he was my soulmate for a reason. He seemed mature, intelligent, and kind. We laughed a lot and had genuinely wonderful times together.

However, he also started saying things that made me uncomfortable. For example: “Don’t die yet, I have to put a baby inside of you” while I was literally choking and struggling to breathe. He also said things like, “I could manipulate you if I wanted to. I could play games. There were two girls I was talking to before you. But I won’t do that to you. I just won’t.” He said variations of this many times.

Other comments included: “I’m going to put a baby in you to show everyone you’re mine,” “Do you promise I’ll always have access to your body even if you’re with someone else?” and “I’m always going to have access to you, aren’t I?” He once asked, “Did you like it? Being choked?” after I had told him in detail about developing PTSD and needing therapy after being choked in real life. There were many more comments I’ve chosen to forget.

The worst part was the mind games. His entire online presence centered around authenticity, yet he was one of the most psychologically confusing people I’ve ever met. There were games, coldness, and gaslighting.

One of the first incidents happened during an early video call. We had been watching multiple episodes of Black Mirror late into the night. He had started watching his own content and wasn’t really talking to me. I turned off my webcam because I was exhausted and struggling to keep my eyes open. When he asked why, I calmly explained that I needed to sleep and apologized. He responded by saying, “You shouldn’t have just turned it off. Personally, I wouldn’t have done that. Bye.” He criticized me further before abruptly hanging up. I was so upset that I cried all night. He never apologized.

He remained cold toward me for a day or two until I eventually brought it up. He told me my etiquette wasn’t right and that it was a slippery slope when he felt someone had disrespected him. I’m an extremely mild-mannered person who hates conflict and would never intentionally disrespect someone.

Another time, while we were playing a game over voice chat, he said, “If you lose, I’m making you do something for me. You’re going to do something for me.” I joked, “Haha, no pressure though, right? It’s just for fun?” He replied, “It’s only you at the end of the day who decides to be pressured. It’s not anything I say.”

There was also a time when he asked me to hang out, but then immediately played Marvel Rivals for three and a half hours to complete an event while I waited. Another day, I played Dying Light by myself. Later, he asked, “I could run it right now. Wanna play?” I didn’t respond for about fifteen minutes because I was playing. He immediately became cold. I apologized profusely when I saw his message, told him I wanted to play with him, and asked if he still wanted to. He replied, “Well, have fun. I’m in Marvel Rivals. Some other time.”

That night, I cried so hard I was shaking. My heart was pounding because I was terrified I had hurt him, even though I was the one who had been hurt. Later, when we played Dying Light together, I wasn’t able to revive him once. He coldly said, “It’s fine. I’ll just play as if I was playing by myself. Just do your own thing. I don’t know, you keep rushing me.”

At one point, I withdrew for about two weeks because I was going through a major depressive episode. When I apologized and explained what was happening, he told me this relationship wasn’t making him happy anymore, that it wasn’t worth doing anymore, and that, to a certain extent, people choose to be “broken.” Looking back, this should have been my way out. It didn’t seem like he truly intended to end things, but rather wanted to make me feel guilty.

He consistently made everything about himself, gaslighted me, exaggerated my mistakes while minimizing his own, belittled me daily, and positioned himself above me. If he said something hurtful, it was always “just teasing,” and I was “too serious.” It made me feel like I was losing my mind, constantly wondering if I was the problem.

He also became upset and angry over trivial things in games, turning what should have been fun into an exhausting experience where I constantly walked on eggshells to keep him happy. During one game I was finally beating him at, he said, “I’m trying to read you like an intelligent person because you are, but the way you’re playing isn’t.” I pointed out that I had won three games, so my strategy clearly wasn’t stupid if it worked. He responded, “I wouldn’t call winning one out of ten games winning.” When I became upset, he said, “I was just talking to you like you’re a guy.” He also always seemed to hate the games I was better than him at. I feel like a complete utter fool, but I’ve trying to be easy on myself. I did the hardest part, cutting him off.

If I could say one more thing to him, I’d say: You can hide behind an “authentic” profile, believe you’re a good person, and still lie. But I see through that. I see the way you’ve treated me, whether you recognize it yourself or not. And if none of this was intentional, then I honestly don’t know what to say.

What I do know is this: if I were a 31-year-old man treating an inexperienced 21-year-old woman this way, with so little care or consideration, I would be deeply ashamed of myself. You are vile.