u/IxeCream_

me and my boyfriend broke up 2 weeks ago, and i have been bottling up my feelings since then. i’m saving it for after our exams so i can focus on studying, which is this week pa. i have cried a few times, pero hindi siya complete breakdown or meltdown. yesterday was probably the worse one, i literally cried while i was studying kasi na-overwhelm ako with the stress + break-up + sigawan sa bahay. naawa ako sa sarili ko kasi despite crying, tinuloy ko pa rin magreview. it lasted like 20 minutes lang naman, and i slept after. rn sinusubukan ko ulit magreview, pero hindi ako makapag-concentrate. ang hirap. i miss him so bad pero wala akong magawa kasi we both know that we need this break-up. ldr kami and we’ve met a few times. sa buong 4 years na yun, he was a part of my everyday routine. ang hirap kasi nasanay na ako sakaniya. he was my boyfriend, best friend, and confidant. we were able to get closure pero tangina ang hirap talaga. i wish time would just fast forward na lang. ang sakit sa puso tuwing naaalala ko siya. :((

this isn’t everything pero i had to rant kahit onti lang. i’d rather not tell my friends yet, although i plan to tell them sa sleepover namin on thursday after our major exam. halos 2 weeks na rin kaming hindi nagkikita because of the class suspensions. sa buong time na yun, nasa kwarto lang ako, which is most likely why mas nahihirapan akong i-distract sarili ko. sana hindi na mag-suspend ng klase bukas.

hello! meron po bang nagbebenta ng batil patong around laspi?

Problem/Goal: hindi ko sure if rough patch lang ba ulit tong pinagdadaanan namin or sign na to na hindi kami compatible and kailangan na namin i-tigil yung rs namin.

Context: 4 years na kami ng boyfriend ko. i am 18 years old, siya 20. legal kami both sides and anim na beses na kaming nagkita. maganda relationship namin nung una palang, we had that connection. pero hindi rin yun nagtagal, at naging toxic and on & off kami, and siya mostly ang red flag noon (although i had my faults din naman). pero umayos din kami after a while and nalagpasan namin yun. kaso lumala ulit nung namatay mother ko, this time ako naman yung naging red flag. naging mentally unstable ako, i started distancing myself from everyone, including my bf. i always had sudden outbursts and i always lost my temper pagdating sakaniya, and i kept on pushing him away at the same time. pero tiniis niya yun and he stayed by my side. it took a while for me to change, and gets ko na na-drain siya. pero at the end of the day, we both still chose each other. we’ve completely committed to each other, ilang beses na namin napag-usapan future namin together.

pero right now, medyo unsure na kami both. napapagod na raw siya sakin. tuwing may argument kami, kahit valid naman nararamdaman ko e at maayos ko naman siya kinakausap e sinasabi niyang “lagi” ko siyang inaaway. tuwing sinasabi niya yun, naiinis ako kasi nakaka-invalidate, kasi alam ko sa sarili kong nagbago na ako. naiintindihan ko na na-trauma siya sa mga outbursts ko before, pero ang sakit pa rin. hindi ko siya masisi.

ako naman, pakiramdam ko hindi na niya ako namamahal sa paraan na gusto ko, kahit na alam kong mahal na mahal niya ako. gusto kong nag d deep talks kami, gusto kong na c curious siya sakin. lagi akong may tanong sakaniya, pero siya halos wala. tapos tuwing mag i initiate naman ako ng deep talk, sagot niya lagi “di ko alam”. ang sakit sakit. alam kong mahal na mahal niya ako, nararamdaman ko rin yun. marami na siyang ginawa para i-prove na mahal niya ako. pero hindi yun enough para sakin kasi hindi niya maibigay yung gusto ko. gusto ko ng mas malalim pa. ewan ko ba, hindi ko ma-explain. mahal na mahal ko siya pero hindi ko nakikita sarili kong mag settle sa ganon. PERO, eto na nga yung dilemma ko kaya nagdadalawang isip ako:

malaking factor yung LDR setup namin. ilang beses palang kami nagkita at halos 1 week lang kami lagi nagsasama. we spend most of our time in a LDR, so i can’t really completely conclude na hindi kami magiging okay in the future. kaya lang naman kami ganto kasi LDR kami, and napakahirap mag communicate nang maayos sa ganitong set-up. however, despite our short time together whenever we meet up, i always feel loved and cared for. yung connection na hinahanap ko sakaniya pag ldr kami, although not really in the way na gusto at ine-expect ko, nararamdaman ko yun pag magkasama kami. mas na a assure ako. i love my boyfriend so much and i can’t bear the thought of losing him, pero i am willing to let go if we aren’t compatible with each other, kasi alam kong pareho lang kaming mauubos pag pinagpatuloy pa rin namin. pero ayun nga, hindi ako makapag decide completely dahil hindi ko pa siya nakasama nang matagal irl.

kaso halatang matagal pa bago kami magsama, kasi kahit pa may work siya, hindi yun sapat para sa amin. nag aaral pa ako, tas siya mag aaral na rin (nagstop siya for a year para magtrabaho and mag-ipon). hindi namin alam kung kakayanin naming tiisin to hanggang sa magsama kami.

we’ve grown so much since the start of our relationship. whenever we had conflicts, naaayos din namin kahit pa nakaka ilang away kami bago mangyari yun. we both compromise, and we would always end up choosing each other. we’re both still young, pero committed na kami sa isa’t isa. mahal ko siya, at mahal niya rin ako, which is precisely why pareho kaming nagdadalawang isip tungkol dito. what should we do?

Previous Attempts: we gave each other space just recently to think about our relationship kung kaya pa ba namin. we chose each other. pero since then, hindi rin namin ulit napag usapan yun, so i decided to bring it up, kasi how can the conflict be resolved if we dont talk about it, di ba? dahil dun, we both found out na pareho namin napagdesisyonang itigil na pag lumala pa to. kaso dahil nagdadalawang isip pa ako dahil sa pagiging ldr namin, sinabi ko yun sakaniya. dahil jan, hindi ulit kami sure and decided to give each other space again. pano ba naman kasi, ung unang space namin e isang araw lang tinagal, chinat niya ko agad kasi namiss niya ako (pero namiss ko rin siya). pareho naming mahal na mahal ang isa’t isa, and we always chose to get through our rough patches together.

hello po, gusto ko sana malaman kung magkano magpa check sa obgyn and kung saan maganda. gusto ko po kasi sana malaman if pwede akong mag take ng pills para sa dysmenorrhea ko. there were a few times na po kasi na super unbearable ng cramps ko to the point na hindi talaga ako makagalaw at nahihilo ako, although umo okay lang din naman pag natulog ako (kaso hirap din ako makatulog sa sobrang sakit). and if possible, gusto ko rin malaman if may sakit ako or STDs. also, ano po usually ginagawa ng obgyn to check, and gaano katagal bago ko malaman results? thank you po.