u/LadyBogangles14

The title says most of what is going on. My husband has essentially gone non-contact with me. It’s just killing me. I know it’s driven by his mental unwellness.

I miss him like a missing limb. This has been the hardest thing I’ve been through.

I’m just miserable today. I’m supposed to spend the afternoon with my brother, which I don’t want to do, but I know it’ll be important to be around people today.

Weekends sucks since Hubby left. I’ve literally got nothing to do. I tried to go out and get dinner on Friday, I lasted about 45 minutes until I had to leave and then cry in my car on the way home.

I’m just tired of this. Him being fine, him assuming I’m fine, because his delusions have told him I have a long term boyfriend, that I was cheating on him with. Which of course is false.

The no-contact is killing me.

My husband is filing for divorce this week. For the last three weeks or so he’s been vacillating between divorce and reconciliation.

On Saturday firmly landed on divorce.

My biggest issue is that he’s divorcing me because he’s convinced I’ve been cheating on him for several years, when that’s just not the case.

I feel like I’m being punished for nothing.

My husband is also going through some significant mental health problem right now, but he’s essentially cut me off from trying to help him.

The issue Is that I still love him and he says he still loves me and I can’t understand how this is happening. Why is he allowed to blow up our marriage when he’s obviously not in his and thinking clearly?

I love him, he loves me, yet divorce.

Makes no sense

He even said that he wants to remain friends and possibly get back together in the future. As remains, I’m stuck in this nightmare.

I don’t want to be single again, I don’t want to date again, or see myself married again.

I just want my husband back.

I want to start out that I love my husband, we’ve been together for 14 years

He also has significant mental health challenges.

He recently lost his job, to cope, went on Paxil, had a manic event, is accusing me of cheating (because of circumstances that aren’t just coincidence- like I’m buying new clothes quite a bit, but I’ve also lost 40 pounds since this time last year) but I haven’t cheated.

I’m bereft, I’m out of my mind grieving

What do I do? How do I get through the next few days? I really hope that once his head clears up, he’ll want to come home.

Despite all of this I’m not mad. Would I be mad if he had pneumonia?

Just help me get through the hours.