Location: Florida

My friend is trying to divorce her husband, but he makes it almost impossible.

She’s a stay at home mom of 5. He was recently baker acted for two weeks, came home said he wanted a divorce, blamed her for all his problems in life, and left for his mom’s house.

They have a joint bank account. Every time his paycheck is deposited, he immediately transfers all of the money out, leaving the joint account with a $0 balance.

She has no money for groceries, bills (all utilities were in deferment), or to hire a divorce lawyer.

She feels completely trapped because every attorney wants a retainer, and she can’t save anything before he empties the account again. She’s having to rely on food, pantries and donations from other people just to feed the kids. Meanwhile, he’s out spending all of their money as soon as the check hits the account, but the kids are going without. He’s making demands to “visit“ for maybe an hour or two at a time, but then turns around and leaves them to go back home and live with his mom meanwhile, my friend is struggling to find money to pay for diapers.

Is this considered financial abuse? What legal options does she have in Florida to get this divorce started when her spouse is leaving her with no access to marital funds? Can the court order temporary access to money or require him to contribute to attorney’s fees? Is there anything she can do before she can afford to retain counsel?

She’s unsure of his employment at this moment because he has not reported to work for quite some time, but he does have a check coming in. He also receives disability from the VA. But as soon as that money gets directly deposited, he transfers it to an account she doesn’t have access to.

She’s in Florida, so any Florida-specific advice would be especially appreciated.

I'm 29 and she's 28. we've been married for five years. I found out she's cheating on me. she always gets home late lately, always hides her phone I'm nearby her. She's been avoiding me and my approach. I got confused, scared, and even thought I was the problem. I did most of the house work, work from 5-9. I work at a small construction company as a site manager. And one night I unlocked her phone while she was sleeping and found she's cheating with her coworker for three weeks now. Has anyone been through the same thing and help me on what I should do? I love her, but I'm scared if I'll disappoint her if I confront her.

I’ve (35f) been thinking about divorce for about a year. We have a 5 year old and he’s a great dad and a good person. I have love for him but he’s not my soulmate.

Last year we went to therapy. I was/am frustrated that I have grown as a person getting sober, meeting new people, trying new hobbies and even thriving at work. He hasn’t changed. He still has the same high school and college friends, plays video games, doesn’t take care of his body, and complains constantly about work. Nothing has changed. When I bring it up in and out of therapy there’s still no change.

But the thing is that he isn’t a bad person. He doesn’t kill bugs, he’s a great dad, people think he’s nice.

I’m not miserable I just don’t feel like he’s my soulmate and with a 5 year old it’s hard to feel like maybe I’m being selfish. Or maybe I wait until our 5 year old is 18. I don’t know. It’s almost like it would be easier if he was a bad person. But he hasn’t done anything wrong, he’s just not growing as a person.

Our 6-year anniversary is next week. Last week I found out my wife has been having an affair with a colleague (they’re both teachers). Allegedly it was up to 3rd base, not the entire way. But long story short, she said she hasn’t been romantically interested in me in the past 6 months and instead of hurting me by telling me, she has enjoyed the affection from a colleague and they’ve struck up an entanglement. When I found out last week, I was beyond devastated. I still am. She seems relieved that I found out, and she has just been “focusing on the kids to be there for them.” But she shows no remorse for what she’s done to me and our marriage. She isn’t wanting to stay married to me because she is in love with me, she initially wanted to stay together “because of the kids” but be okay with her stepping out of the marriage to pursue other people. Just typing that hurts my soul.

Within the last week, she doesn’t want to be married to me any longer, however entertains the idea that staying married but separating may be what’s best for the kids. Buckle up for this - she also wants to co-habitate for the lease duration and go our separate ways afterwards. Of course, all of this is killing me inside and I’m filled with grief, sadness, rejection, etc

She doesn’t have a bunch of cash saved up for an attorney, I do. Deep down, even though I’m hurting, I don’t want to hurt her or impact our 3 and 5 year old. The only time she gets emotional is when she realizes how difficult life will be as a single mom. During the school teaching year, I’m the primary parent. She works 4 10s and I work from home 60% of the time so I do all of the preschool and daycare drop offs and pick ups. During the summer she steps up more but I don’t care about parenting or workload distribution, 100% is 100%, it doesn’t matter if at times I’m doing 80% and at times she’s doing 70% because we’ve been a team.

We live in Colorado and it’s a no-fault state. We’re both on the lease. She doesn’t want to move out (mostly because she can’t) and I don’t want to voluntarily leave the household and our babies. Since divorce is the way this is going to go, I had a couple consults with firms and told them that she and I want to work this out amicably and I don’t want to try and fuck her - they are very clear that her infidelity cannot be used in any way unless there was harm done to the kids (which there hasn’t been except for the eventually family breakup that’s looming), she’s actually a very good mom and our children love her very much.

I don’t know what to do. She won’t leave, I won’t leave. She has some fantasy about how I’ll be a cuck and stay married to her for the family, while she takes time to move out in July 2027. It’s so bad that I have to excuse myself from common areas due to crying and shit and I don’t like doing that in front of the kids. Deep down, she hasn’t been happy with one of the most important components of a marriage, but she loves all of the other things about our marriage. I told her that this is the one thing we can’t come back from.

We can agree on most of the parenting plan, except of course, that means that I help out more during the school year. I make $125k she makes $85k. I’m scared because I feel like I’m going to lose 50% of my time with our children, and I’m going to have to pay CS, even though she said it can be $0, ultimately the court won’t let that happen.

I’m really struggling, I really need some advice because I’m spiraling. Firms are asking for $6k to fully represent me, but she can’t get representation?

What I want at the end of the day is for none of this to have happened. But that’s not reality. So where do I go from here? What I NEED is for her to move out. She says if I try to force her out, I’ll just hurt the babies because she will be living in a ghetto area/1 bed apt. Her sister lives 5 minutes away. I wish she would live there, but her sister cannot have her + 50% of my children long term. I thought about moving out and getting my own place, but I cannot afford two households.

What the fuck am I supposed to do? I’m grieving, parenting, leading the house, and trying to pick up these pieces and I’m terrified and heartbroken.

My husband the father of my 4 children is the most selfish person I have ever known. He was my first everything and after 30 years I’m done. I don’t know how to go about divorcing him, If I can pay the mortgage on my own, will the kids resent me in the long run? This has been a loveless, under-appreciated, sexless, unfulfilled, unhappy relationship and I’m done. At 53 years old I should be having the time of our lives, (he’s 65) instead I’m miserable and lonely. The only bright spots are my children.

Won’t bore you with too many details. I (female 26) want to divorce my husband (male 26). We’ve been “together” since we were 14. We didn’t get married until 24. Even then I knew our relationship was in shambles, but like an idiot, I married him anyway. He’s always had this tenancy to talk to me in a very intense, condescending tone. It is always his way or the highway. Everytime I think I have a valid point, he finds away to logically explain how I am wrong, and he is right. And most of the time I can’t even argue with him because the way he argues, he actually makes sense. I’ll add though, I recall on our honeymoon, he called me a “dumb a** bi***” because I forgot the credit card I used to book the rental car. There’s been multiple situations similar since when, like when we had a 6 hour argument over me tying a plastic bag with our food in it. I always find a way to validate how he treats me. I don’t communicate well. I have low aspirations. I shut down and blank out during arguments, so usually he has the high ground. I know I’m a bad wife. I don’t do all of my wifely duties. All he wants is for us to “build up our lives and succeed” and that is so valid. But the way he treats me, his criticism, his condescending tone, I’m exhausted. Everytime there’s something he slightly disagrees with, it’s met with the this tone that makes him sound like he’s sick and tired or talking to this idiotic imbecile. His aspirations are no longer worth it. I need to leave, but I cannot bear the failure or being a divorced at only 26. How did you do it? How did you make the decision to leave? What have your the confidence? Did you for back to your parents house? What was their reaction? When did you know enough was enough? Please help me. I don’t know how much longer I can hold on.

Hi everyone,

I’m looking for recommendations for a reputable private investigator who can help locate someone who has been avoiding court for over a year and moving between states.

If you know a trustworthy PI or have any good leads, I’d really appreciate your recommendations. If you don’t have a recommendation, please feel free to ignore this post.

I have been trying to get a divorce for over a year now. My soon to be ex- husband and I have been married for almost 10 years. He is 25 years older than me, retired, and he owns a home that he receives rental income along with a social security. We originally agreed with getting an uncontested divorce considering we never owned property, had a joint bank account, filed taxes jointly , and did not have children.
Shortly after he hired a lawyer and blindsided me with asking for spousal support, receiving half of my retirement savings, and pension. I am a teacher and make about double of what he claims on his taxes. He owns a home. I do not. We rented a home while we were together and always split bills 50/50.
I understand that his home is considered separate property. I do not want any money from him. I just want a divorce.
I decided to hire an attorney about 9 months ago and paid a retainer of $5,500. During the past 9 months I have not received the support I needed and have now exhausted the retainer fee. A preliminary hearing has been scheduled and now I need to figure out if I should continue this process in court. I’m probably going to have to pay a lot more to justify why I shouldn’t have to pay my husband around $30,000 in order to get divorced. After getting notified of the court hearing, my husband sent a proposal of a lump sum of $10,000 paid to him instead of going to court. I feel he doesn’t deserve anything from me considering his assets are larger than mine. His home is paid off and he always told me that was his retirement.
My question is: should I take this to court or pay him the lump sum of $10,000? I would have to take a loan from my pension in order to do so.
Thank you for any advice.

Does anyone have any experience of using/deal with a pension on divorce expert (PODE)?

My ex and I separated 3 years ago after an 11 yr marriage. For various reasons we haven’t sorted the divorce until now.

He is now 47, I am 43. He stayed in the family home (mortgaged) and I moved into rented accommodation. 2 children (13 and 10), 50/50 split. He wants to buy me out of the house (my name remains on the mortgage.). He pays the mortgage, I pay my rent.

He earns £67k, I earn £44k. The house has around £130k equity in it. His CETV is £200k (teachers pension) and mine is £140k (NHS pension).

My solicitor has advised having a PODE look at the pension value. My understanding is that this could cost £2-10k between us. I’ve never known anyone who has divorced to go down this route and would like better understand whether it is worth it. My concern is that it could cost so much that is ends up wiping out any potential benefits.

We have tried mediation but it has failed (his only offer is 50/50 split on the house and don’t touch each others pensions. I feel this is unfair to me since my borrowing capacity is lower, worked fewer hours looking after the children whilst I supported his career progression)

I would appreciate any advice or guidance. Many thanks.

My husband 29/m has not out romantic effort in for years. Fast forward to today we have a 2 year old. Things are worse. He provides financially and takes care of the cars and yard, but has not met my needs. I just want dates and to explore together. He does whatever I ask him to do for our toddler. For instance, I asked him to start helping more in the morning before daycare and he has been on top of that since I asked. When I talk to him about wanting dates and to hangout with friends he’s extremely nonchalant and does not care to console me. When I’m in pain I have to ask for help(meds, back rub, etc). I’m barely even typing this because I’m so drained. I don’t even feel sad. I mostly feel frustrated. How do you know when it’s time to stop trying? I

My husband (31 M) and I (31 F) have been married for 3 years. Initially we were both very angry people but i used to get angry and just vent he used to take it too far like strangling himself yelling breaking stuff etc and eventually I started doing it too. We both drove each other crazy and there was a lot of violence and yelling. He is a good hearted man he takes care of me treats me like a baby takes my stand in front of his family never etc etc but he easily get amnoyed and then treats me like dirt. We eventually decided to move to a new house and start fresh. I stopped yelling and everything but he didn’t he pushed me once when we were in a fight and I let it go and didn’t hit him back second time he did the same thing like he didn’t hit me but held me really hard that it hurt and again I didn’t do anything, third time he abused me and i didn’t abuse him back because I didn’t want to be my old self. I think he kept thinking that i will still continue doing the old stuff like being violent and abusive but overtime i realised thats not me i am just catching up on his level and didn’t do it again. Last week we got into a fight and he again abused me. Since then I haven’t spoken to him, he comes and apologises everyday but I don’t feel like talking to him. Also since the beginning of marriage he has no interest in having sex. We only do it if i am nagging him about it or initiating it. Sometimes even when I initiate he refuses with som excuse. I asked him to see a doctor but he doesn’t.

I know its hard to believe but he is a really really nice person when he is not angry. I just dont know how many times should I forgive him and should I just consider divorce. Also i dont know how to live in a sexless marriage where i only get pity sex. He is a very defensive person, I always walk on eggshells around him. Getting a divorce will be very hard for me since my family will totally oppose it and i am scared that i will regret it later on.

Brief background: in late February my partner and husband of 26 years told me he wanted out of our marriage - self-indulgence masked as self-actualization, e.g., happiness seeking with another woman as he was already seeing a colleague of both of ours that is 18-years younger (he is nearly 67 she is 48). It was devastating, I both was caught completely off-guard, but also knew he was capable of this type of behavior as he has done this before with previous wives (longer story and not necessary for this post). He literally told me and I have not seen him since, he has come by the house to get some of things twice - but mainly he just left. He was very cruel when we did talk by phone after this happened (we only talked twice for about 15 mins) so I have not seen, nor talked to him since he left. I have communicated only by email, and very transactional. This is all despite the fact that we have to communicate because all three of us have intersecting professional circles.

I have done all the work - I hired a certified divorce financial analyst and worked through an equitable asset division; I hired an attorney to execute the marital settlement agreement that I wrote; I have packed his things up in the house that I am taking in the agreement (we have two houses); and packed up his thing in our primary residence because I am living there for another year. It will be officially over sometime later this month. I still have some sadness, not for losing the man he is, but for the man I thought he was. But mostly, I am feeling hopeful. I am embracing my future and not dwelling on the past. I am still lonely sometimes but am not going to reach out for a new intimate relationship until I feel that my baggage won't be a part of the discussion. I have started finding social events to engage with though (meetup is a great place, it is not for dating, but just social, highly recommend this!).

I will tell you all these things I have learned:

1. Take back your agency, do the work to protect your interests, but do it quietly, gently and without emotion (this is very hard - but it is in *your* best interest to do it this way - save your emotion for your friends/family/support system - not him).
2. Lean hard on your support system, find people you can call when you need to vent, don't call him (even if you are on good terms).
3. It *does* get better -- visualize *your* space/new home/future, every day spend at least 5 mins thinking about this. Slowly, too slowly, this will become the more present thought and regrets/sadness/anger will fade.
4. Be the better person - don't try to push the justice/fairness that might be justified - you need to be accountable only for your actions. I might say this is most important to remember, because while we are going through this we will want to say and do totally understandable (and justifiable) things - but it won't change the situation, and you don't want to feel regret (in the future) on top of everything else. It is better to know that you are a true and good person, no matter what situation others create, than to give in to base instincts (even when justified, I will say that again :)).
5. Try to find other people around you that need support -- be their support. This has really helped me get out of my own head and sadness. There are lots of people in your circle who are likely going through their own things - being *their* support will help you too - volunteer if you have time. This really has helped me - I couldn't do it the first couple of months while I was processing - but since then I have found this to really help me a lot.

Take care of yourself, be kind to yourself, know that there is no *right way* to deal with this - you just need to do the best you can to get through the day.

So in a nutshell, the relationship my partner and I had was very emotionally abusive and manipulative. I worked on myself, went and currently doing therapy. And I have discovered that I was a victim of a situation that I was in extreme denial of. After the realization and understanding that my attempts to collaborate or work on our relationship were in vein I said I wanted a divorce. She lacked accountability and has continued with creating no win scenarios where she can use as ammunition. Things are sadly not civil at this time. It’s been over a week she refused my position demanding another chance. When I rejected the idea I was then kicked out of my house and since have had limited access to my children or property. I’m in the living in a hotel stage while gathering resources and waiting to hear back from attorneys (4th of July).

Are there any helpful iPhone friendly AI tools that can comb my iMessage history? I have numerous written examples, but I was not planning or prepared for the direction our conversation went. I have mentions of threats, ultimatums, blackmail, etc. I could really use the help.

We owe 165,000 on our home at a 2.6% rate. The home is valued at 500,000. In Florida with high homeowners and property taxes our mortgage is 2300/mth. This payment is definitely doable on my salary which is 94,000. I have to buy him out of the house which is around 170,000. His 50% of his 401K will be around 450,000 which I know can be transferred to mine via a QDRO with no penalty. My predicament is do I pay the 20% taxes and pay him out of the 401K or do I take out a heloc which will increase my monthly mortgage payments. Alimony and child support have not been determined as of yet so should I wait to see if I can afford the heloc? My lawyer doesn't think alimony will be a lot even after 27 yrs and his income being twice mine since I make a decent wage. Finance is not my strong point but ask me anything medical and I can help you. Thanks for all advice

I (29m) got arrange-married to my wife (27f) and we got married 5 years back. Things have been very rocky and my wife prefers to live at her parents house and hasn’t been accommodating my widowed mother.
We have a 3 yr old child whom i spent just 2 months together.

She is borderline narcissistic and just wants to be married on paper. No affection or care. I’ve tried therapy and many attempts with friends, family elders and her parents dont care either. She would blackmail me with suicidal attempts at home during arguments.

I’ve applied for divorce and need opinions on future remarriage and co-parenting if at all it is possible.
My wife doesn’t give me divorce. She wants to live with me now. Lets me meet child snd tries to change my mind. But I’m burnt out.
Too much disrespect, hurt, intentional manipulation.
I just want to live peacefully without hurting anyone. Cant take anymore pain

Do shoot your opinions. Trying to keep it short.

My ex and I had SO MANY shared interests. We loved the same movies, same theme parks, same tv shows. Some of them are things I loved long before I met him, but after 10 years of these feeling like “our things” I’m not sure how to feel like they are “my things” again.

Example - my mom and I loved The Mummy and watched it all the time. My ex and I watched it constantly (it was our go-to movie). How do I retake ownership of it so I can enjoy it again?

For context, my husband and I are both in our mid 40s, no kids. Been married for 9 years, together for 15. I found out he’s been cheating on me every time I go out of town for work which is about every two months.

We have a lot of assets together and I have no idea where to even start untangling the web that was our life. Money is of no concern I just want someone who is aggressive, cut throat and thorough.

Thank you for reading.

During our marriage, I worked nearly 80 hours per week because the children's father was unable to maintain full-time employment. I was the primary financial provider for our family. I even supported him financially while he attended graduate school, despite being pregnant with our fourth child at the time.

A few days ago, his attorney sent me a settlement proposal requesting that I pay him $2,400 per month in spousal maintenance.

He is currently working with a life insurance company. If he chose to work in the field related to his graduate degree, he could likely earn a higher and more stable income. In fact, he recently quit one of his part-time jobs that was related to his major because he wanted to focus on selling life insurance instead. Over the past two years, his income has remained low, largely because he has chosen to pursue this career, which mainly involves networking and meeting people. I believe he has voluntarily chosen not to maximize his earning potential.

I have worked extremely hard throughout our marriage to provide for our family and to earn enough income to support all of us. In contrast, I do not believe he has made the same effort to pursue stable, income-producing employment. Instead, he chose to leave a job related to his education in order to focus on a multi-level marketing-style life insurance business, and now he is requesting spousal maintenance from me. He says he is simply exercising his legal rights because the law allows him to seek maintenance.

However, I am currently pregnant and due to give birth in October. I will be taking maternity leave, and after the baby is born, I will be the baby's primary caregiver because I do not have anyone available to provide childcare. As a result, I will not be able to earn the same income that I did in the past.

Given these circumstances, can he still insist that I pay him $2,400 per month in spousal maintenance?

It is so unfair how the circumstances are...

And Im fraustrated... and exhausted... stressed..basically he wants me to work more to support him. Ha......

I need your honest opinion.

We never get physical. One time 2.5 years ago when he betrayed me and lied to me we got in a huge fight and we’re breaking up. We both drank. I came at him physically once. He’s much stronger than me. I never did again.. we got in a huge fight again 2.5 years later (I mean we argue and stuff but don’t get physical) and he just kept poking at me and twisting the knife with his works just trying to provoke me… I was writing down notes for therapy.. he strong armed me and grabbed my phone and threw it in floor. I was trying to get off the bed to get my phone he held me down in the bed and was like holding me down and wouldn’t let me go (I have a baby with him and I’m 14 wks pregnant) he grabbed my by the stomach and I screamed I’m pregnant! After when he kept getting in my face ( I was back on bed breastfeeding baby back to sleep) and trying to get a reaction out of me triggering me with hurtful words so I like kicked him off the bed to leave me alone and he’s like oooh you’re gonna do that? I should record. He starts recording me. Zooming in on my face laughing… I get up again he’s still pointing his camera at me. I’m not even doing anything but giving him the death stare to stop. I’m sooo fed up at that point. I’m like stop should I call the police?! I dial 911 just to tease him.. and hang up quickly and it was too late.. they call back and I’m like I’m sorry I swiped the SOS button in my screen on accident everything is good. Cop drove over here to check in 10 later I said it’s all good and he drove away. The rest of the night we were fighting and he kept recording me and I was so mad I was trying to grab the phone from him obviously he’s stronger… as my arm jerks and hit him in the neck he’s like did you just punch me in the neck? (Purposely saying this bc he’s recording a video still) and then he starts threatening me like great now I have a video of you to send in. I call the cops and they’re gonna arrest you. Mind you u have three kids of my own from my late husband who passed away 5 years ago. He is now threatening me to have me arrested and have my kids taken from me. Nothing can trigger someone more like being told your kids taken from you. I start crying and pushing him like you’re gonna threaten to take my kids from me?! Are you kidding? He’s like ohhh you’re coming at me again? And then baby wakes up she needs to be breastfed back to sleep and he grabs her as she’s crying and saying yes I’m not giving her to you she’s not safe around you.. I’m like omg stop torturing her let her go back to sleep. Finally gives her back and says ok but I have to watch you. Then we are arguing he’s like you hurt my wrist (probably when he was holding phone and i was trying to grab it) and I’m like oh I’m sorry you’re weak? He’s like ok. That’s it. I’m calling cops they’re gonna report you. And walks out like he’s calling…. Im laying there wondering if he is really gonna do that if I should get dressed if they’re gonna come for me. He ended up going to sleep in basement. Next day we got into it again and he gets mad and he’s like that’s it I’m going…. I’m trying to celebrate our daughter’s first birthday and do a smash cake and he leaves. He said to get away. But he filed a police report again me saying I punched him in the throat and got on top of him and had my arm around his neck… he sent them video of me trying to grab his phone and where he says did you just punch me in my throat. He tells me a day later and says I have to go get questioned by police. My whole world comes crashing down. Cops said if he didn’t close the case I would be arrested. I feel completely betrayed. Yea I reacted and I was hurt like a hurt little girl fighting a man who’s stronger than me and also bullying me until I reached a breaking point. It’s not like we get physical or I’ve attacked him or come at him like that like this is consistent thing??? I understand filing a report when you’re abused but I didn’t even hurt him, he told cops he’s not hurt but his neck was sore… that I got in top of him while he was sitting and tried to choke him… he agreed to close case and told me to tell the cops I just pushed him and tried grabbing his phone. They have me down for strangulation and 2 churns of domestic battery 😭😭😭 (hitting him and throat and punch in the chest— which literally I barely did that I more like pushed him with my fist, as he was backing up) I was so enraged and hurt by this betrayal. I came home and he’s asking for forgiveness and that it was a “mistake” but this is now in the system under my name forever. I am so heartbroken and sad. I’m pregnant with your second child back to back. I’m exhausted and tired. We got in a fight. We could’ve come back together and made things right. It’s almost like this manipulative tactic of poking someone until they react and then blaming them for reacting and playing the victim. Now he can hang hang it over my head that he can just make one more call and I will be arrested. The first day he was apologizing and saying he made a mistake and he will do anything to me this relationship. Then the next day he’s threatening me again and saying hey at least I know he will never raise your hand at me again and if you do, I will call the police and you will be arrested.. I don’t want to live in fear with a man like this. Do you think that he did the right thing reporting me after this?? Also the fact that he wants to just make up and forgive each other and move on in the relationship and I just can’t see that happening. I feel like he’s betrayed me on a level that I just don’t see him as the same person anymore. I feel so hurt and backstabbed and I’m not making excuses for my actions. I just think that from one fight like this I think it’s not fair that he reported me like that and they put me down for three different assaults or whatever I am so sad… I have three kids of my own and two with him and about to be a mother of five. We had a good life together. I own the house and he lived with his mother and then when we met, he moved in after a short time then he has it good he doesn’t even pitch in as much and gets to save money on the side for himself while I cover the costs mostly for everything… sure he split some bills for him, but to even rent a house like this, he would be paying so much more. I don’t know what the right thing to do is just forgive him and make peace and move on for the sake of family and kids and work through counseling and therapy? Do I just keep him at a distance now and we work on coparenting? I’m just so sad and heartbroken. I don’t know what to do. If he goes to court against me and we fully break up then he has this report against me to use against me to try to get why he wants. He’s living at his mom’s now. And he has included his mom in our drama or anytime we would get in a fight every time and his family gets way too involved. It’s like I’m in a relationship with him and his family and everything always has to be a sitdown discussion with them if they get involved in our argument or fight . I don’t know what to do. What’s your view? Thanks in advance for reading this.

EDIT: what he did when he was strongarming me on the bed was several hours before the cop thing and triggering me again and he claims he was holding me down to protect our daughter who was on the bed and said I was thrashing and throwing myself (like no dude I was literally just getting off the bed) the gaslighting is so real. He says if I dare file a report against him he will open the case again and I’ll be arrested. Actually in my anger I called him names and wished bad things upon him and now he’s the one acting like a angel in texts and tries not to say anything bad (maybe he’s actively building a case against me) so if anything I messed up by saying so much out of hurt and anger and he now says he can use that also or file harassment against me etc. that things I said to him are not in my favor. So yea I didn’t think in my anger was was lashing out at him, calling names etc. :/

THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART ❤️ for taking the time to respond. I can’t express how much it means to me that strangers on the internet can be so kind and do that to support someone.