u/Last_Ad2615

Thoughts on each? Experiences?

This feels so strange posting about this. I have had chronic fissures since I was a kid. But recently I had one develop in a new spot and had some heavy bleeding. It cleared up, but several episodes of acidic diarrhea resulted in it opening back up. Then there were four days of very heavy bleeding. Large clots, bowl dark red, slight bleeding after standing up, etc. If I laughed while standing, I got dizzy and would almost fall. Naturally, I didn't go get seen. Now that it's stopped, I'm wondering if I should bother getting my bloodwork done to check for any issues with iron and hemoglobin levels. Part of me says yes, part of me says I'm once again overreacting and should just wing it because I'm not dying. Thoughts?

I've read multiple times that BPC-157 is most useful when injected in the area that needs attention. That it's best for localized injuries. But, in your experience, is it only sub-q or also intramuscular? If my ankle is messed up, where would the best spot be? Thigh? Wrist pain and upper arm? It seems so far away from injury to application spot, if that makes sense.

What has your personal experience been?

Of course I love them. But I can't remember the last time I actually liked them or felt excited to see them. I keep telling myself that it's just because I'm burnt out. But breaks don't help much. They're both ADHD and one is also autistic (level 1). And they're both just added stress. They complain and ask for things constantly. They question every decision I make that they don't agree with. They destroy every room they enter and leave me to clean it up or stress me out ten times over if I make them clean it up. They act out at school constantly (one is an asshole, the other doesn't listen for shit). I'm tired and constantly annoyed. And I don't know if I'll ever not be tired or annoyed when they're around. All I get from one is materialistic bullshit. He hordes toys, begs for everything he sees, and collects anything he can find on the ground constantly - from pieces of metal to leaves and rocks to pieces of broken plastic. The other hyperfixates on shit and won't stop obsessing over it for months at a time. Skibidi toilet. Siren head. Tetris, Pikmin, Coffin dance, water towers.. Whatever the current hyperfixation is, that's all he's gonna talk about and he will NOT STOP. He cusses, threatens people, and literally just got kicked out of summer camp for the week as I'm typing this. Who needs to work anyway, right?

I'm sick of feeling this way and dreading the afternoon when I have to pick them up from school or summer camp. I have no family or close friends to help, and I don't trust people to be more patient with them than their own mom can be. This isn't how it's supposed to be. I don't want to ask about their day. I don't want to hear about their dreams and ambitions. I don't want to do any of it. I don't know what to do anymore. Running away isn't an option, but I wish I could. I keep hoping it'll get better as they get older, but that's hopeless. I don't know if I'm asking for advice or just venting.