u/MarkedManDSX001

(this isn’t a discussion to kick up drama. It’s a genuine discussion on whether or not one side of the community is responsible for the rough reputation)

You tend to hear this argument brought up quite often by people on TikTok, and the “safer” side of twitter; trying to look for something to blame on communities ending up getting so toxic and unbearable but I’ve never actually seen a real correlation between these two topics so I wanted to put it to the community to really decide.

whether the “gooner” side of the community is really the thing that should shoulder the blame for the bad reputation it sometimes gets, or whether it’s something completely different?

I’ve personally seen this same argument getting brought up in the FPE fandom, and the MLP community but I’ve wondered if this is a common issue within indie communities, or if it’s just a vocal minority that seems to spread this idea.

You also tend to see this discussion brought up when people talk about the “downfall” of certain communities, regardless of whether the community is thriving or not.

(Personally I don’t think slapping yiddies on a robot should lead to an artist getting harassment, or giving them a bad rep within a community.)

You tend to hear this argument brought up quite often by people trying to look for something to blame on communities ending up getting so toxic and unbearable but I’ve never actually seen a real correlation between these two topics so I wanted to put it to the community to really decide.

whether the “gooner” side of the community is really the thing that should shoulder the blame for the shitty reputation it sometimes gets, or whether it’s inner personal drama that makes it a bigger issue?

I’ve personally seen this same argument getting brought up in the FPE fandom, and the MLP community but I’ve wondered if this is a common issue within indie communities, or if it’s just a vocal minority that seems to spread this idea.

(Personally I don’t think slapping yiddies on a robot should lead to an artist getting harassment, or giving them a bad rep within a community.)

\[This retelling is gonna read like some trashy horror story from the 2010s but this is what happened a few minutes ago before I woke up\]

I was seemingly alone and walking through some weird ghetto area during sunset, I was humming or singing some made up rap song which I never heard before, when suddenly I ended up back at the top of the street I just came down, this time I took a left and was heading down some nice looking tropical suburb during the night, checking out the colourful blue beach bungalows and serine vibes when I noticed two young girls suddenly run across the street and hide behind a bush as police cars came and stopped at the bottom of the street, knocking on a door to a dimly lit house and heading inside.

At first I seemingly carried on walking when I noticed one of the girls behind the bush peaking out and looking around, I originally seemed to pass the area before turning back around and seeing the kids enter a white dimly lit house. With the number and name being “Super Oak Street; number: 385”

This caused me to turn and head back towards the house with the police and enter uninvited, I was worried and thought maybe the girls were running away or needed help so I tried telling the police about the white house two houses down, then I blinked.

I was still in the house but now the police were gone and the girls were walking around it seemingly confused before heading out to the pitch black garden which seemed to stretch out towards this Japanese style wooden wall, but for some reason I left the house and began walking right of the house, back the way I came, before turning around and seeing this weird looking guy dressed in black and seemingly hiding like he was about to ambush someone, then I noticed that the police caps were discarded in the grass behind him along with their guns, radios, and a single officer laying down in the ground.

I don’t know what compelled me but I walked behind the guy and picked up one of the firearms and shot him , suddenly 5 or 6 copies of the guy came out of nowhere and began to attack me.

(I felt like I was in some Hotline Miami bs but I still had this feeling of needing to stay alive or at the very least find the girls.)

Eventually I made it back to the house and noticed blood droplets leading to the garden but I immediately turned and headed out towards an unmarked car and shooting the driver, who seemed to register what happened but seemed like it was a surprise to him.

Suddenly I felt my body or at least my perspective leading me towards the house again passing through the dimly lit lounge, towards the glass sliding door and out into the darkness.

I could almost see the sun either setting or rising across the rolling fields and just by the power lines, then I kept heading towards the end of the garden, where I found discarded limbs of the girls, this filled me with absolute dread which I still feel right now, but then I began climbing up the wooden wall and found a head, just a head of some girl, discarded of some kind of roof.

By this point I could feel everything around me shifting and changing, I felt warm and sick, and I then knew I was dreaming but couldn’t change anything about the situation.

As I looked back down and saw the head, now it had limbs that were slapped together in a sloppy looking fashion, covered by a puffy pink dress, except for a pair of literal cat paws, then a string of text seemed to appear across my vision like it was out of some old video game, which I vaguely remember as “Paws seem suitable, for someone who always cried.”

Then the dream cut to something that I honestly don’t wanna think about. But it ended like I received the bad ending to some old JRPG, like I was being punished for making the wrong decision.

This nightmare happened just a few minutes ago. I’ve had nightmares of a similar tone but this one shakes me the most because all the horrible things happened when I tried to help and do the right thing, like maybe if I left things alone all the horrible stuff wouldn’t have happened.

 I will be honest, this is a retelling of a nightmare that I had which has since stayed with me for quite some time. I do not exactly know what this nightmare means, or what it correlates to in my own mind but keeping it bottled up has done me no favours. So I’ll tell it in hopes that maybe it will haunt me no longer.

The nightmare originally began as something more like a dream. It was late afternoon, and I was sitting in the lounge with my mother, and we were arguing about something. I do not remember the nature of the argument, but I did remember that it had something to do with my excessive, social media use, at the time I was confused, but I simply shrugged and decided to go for a walk, but I did remember that there were two young girls in the room with me. Their faces were unfamiliar, and I could not recognize where they were from. Nevertheless, I continued out the door and found myself in some sort of industrial area or ghetto.

 I remember the buzz of the lights, the echoes from the nearby parking lot, and the rumbling of trains crossing over tracks in the distance. By the time I realised that I wasn’t anywhere familiar, I blinked and found myself back at the top of the street where I just came from. But now to my left was a whole suburb of old rental beach houses, the industrial area was now surrounded with foliage, palm trees, and high fences. For a while I was quite relaxed, and felt like I was on holiday. By now the sun was setting in the distance and all the porch, street, and welcome signs were lighting up the walkway. I began to walk through the area, keeping to the paths and avoiding trespassing on any properties.

I would then come to the bottom of the street, four or five houses cut off at a turn onto the next street which led me back to where I originally was. However as I was about to keep walking, I noticed two familiar faces, it was the girls from earlier, they ran from across the street where I was walking and behind a row of bushes on one of the properties, I was a little confused at first but I wasn’t able to piece together my thoughts for long, when I saw a cop car come from where I just walked. I was a little spooked but as they drove past me, I calmed down and began my walk once again.

But as I turned to the right, and was ready to head down the next street, I caught a glimpse of the girls, still hiding, I was honestly prepared to just let it go and ignore them but then they ran over and into the house which they were hiding in front of, I originally assumed that they must’ve lived there and were just screwing around, but then I got worried, something about them hiding for no reason, coming out of nowhere, and roaming the streets late was setting off alarms in my head, so I turned towards the house the police had just entered.
 
I’m quite a nervous person, I don’t like getting into fights, or putting myself at risk, and have always acted rather cold and distant, but when it comes to kids, I feel a wave of protectiveness, and a sense that I must do the right thing to ensure that they are safe, needless to say that when I approached the dimly lit house with the cops inside, I remember myself acting shifty and weird, I felt like if I didn’t explain myself right, I could end up sounding like a creep, but I was able to get my message across to the police, they assured me that they would speak with the kids, and make sure they were safe.

With this reassurance I no longer felt so unsure, and prepared myself to leave, heading outside and making my way back down the street, when suddenly I saw the girls again, this time running towards the house I just left. I knew that this was what I wanted, I wanted them to be safe, to be out of harm, and to be with someone who could ensure they were properly protected, but I couldn’t accept it. I had to be sure that they were okay, and so I turned around and headed back towards the house.

Once I stepped across the threshold of the dimly lit building, something changed, I wasn’t confident anymore, I felt ill, like my stomach had a deep pit within it, I was nauseous and my head was spinning, but I carried on, standing in the open lounge were the girls, they were sitting down, calm, relaxed, and keeping close to one another, honestly I felt stupid, like I was being paranoid, overdramatic, and putting myself into weird situations, but then the girls got up, heading towards the large, sliding glass doors you typically see on modern houses, they opened one of them and headed outside, the garden was odd, It was perfectly symmetrical, large Weeping canopies on either side, stretching towards the darkness, where the patio light couldn’t reach, as the girls crossed the threshold into the darkness. I didn’t follow.

I don’t know why? But instead I headed towards the front door and headed back out onto the street, I didn’t carry on down the path I originally went, and instead turned right, back from where I originally came from, but I didn’t get far, I got this strange feeling to look back, and when I did, there was a man, I can’t exactly explain it but, he looked like a typical burglar, black mask, black jacket, jeans, and boots, but he wasn’t looking at me, it was like he was waiting in the wings, waiting to ambush someone, I was confused but then, I was terrified, behind him, sitting in the grass was one of the cops, lifeless, unmoving, and crumpled into a mess on the ground, around them was their hat, radio, and firearm… 

It was strange what happened next, but my body began to move on its own, taking a large circling motion around the guy, and carefully picking up the gun, quietly I snuck up on him and placed it behind his head, with no hesitation, I fired, the shot was deafening, and my blood began to rush to my head, I had lost all sensation in my fingers, my legs felt heavy, and my forehead was drenched in sweat.

 I’m not a violent person, I don’t like the idea of using force as a means to deal with a situation, but in that moment I began to think about the girls, and how I was a coward for not sticking by them, for letting them wander, and for not following them into the garden, I left the dark corner of the house, where I had just shot the interloper, when suddenly I was being rushed by five or six random guys, all wearing similar outfits like the last guy. What came next felt like some unnatural, yet violent game in the claustrophobic suburban street corner, and my adrenaline was moving my body in a pure flow of fight or flight.

I worked my way through the masked creeps, unaware if I was in the right, I felt like I was an outsider in this situation. Like a camera following an actor into their next action scene, but every muscle, every sense of nausea, and adrenaline was my own, piloting me towards the house. Rushing back into the dimly lit house and past the lounge, I felt sick but instead of encountering anymore assailants, I found a small yet steady trickle of blood, leading from the patio, all the way past the trees, my heart stopped, blood ran cold, and dread began to settle in.

On one side was darkness so oppressive that I could almost hear the humming of the light behind me, and to my right, past the rolling, vacant hills, and sandy dunes in the distance, was the lining of powerlines and pylons which loomed over the hills, like giants absorbing all light from the vaguely setting sun. Despite all that happened, all my apprehension, nausea, and dread. I pushed on, using my phone torch to light my way past the trees.

As I moved deeper into the darkness, I kept praying that the girls were okay, though I didn’t know them, my dream and in turn my mind, appointed them as some kind of importance, and so, I had to save them, but I was too late. Just past the last two trees, hanging below into the wild grass, draped across a wooden fence, was the girls, or at least parts of them, someone had chosen to splay them across the back of the garden, a whole patch of grass was seeped in red, the sight had me completely shaken, it was cruel, and just from how things were set out, it wasn’t a monster that did this, everything was surgical, deliberate, and taken with care. But the back wall, it had a long streak of viscera lining it, like something was laying against it before being dragged up, and over.

This was already a hellish sight but my body pressed on, taking my time in climbing up and over the fence, but instead of finding my footing on the pavement, or more grass, I was perched on top of a building, either I was completely out of it or had greatly misjudged how far I had climbed. But I wasn’t given any sense of escape from my dread, as when I took in my immediate surroundings, I was met by the sight of a head, not one of the girls, but another young girl, just left there, discarded like an empty can on a school roof. 

I felt like I had ran into some sort of cruel game, the whole thing was evil, pure evil, and it was meant to torment me, I soon began to feel all my sense of self, and existence being ripped away from me, and soon I became an outsider, a player who  was controlling a protagonist of a very fucked up situation, as I began to find my balance again, I took notice of the head, now adorned with a sloppy, stitched together body, all dressed up in a frilly pink dress.

But of all the things that could have pushed me to my breaking point, it was the hands, or rather the lack of them, instead of human hands, some sick bastard had taken the liberty to sew a cat's paws to them, by this point I felt nothing, my mind was weak, my nerves were shot, and all colour faded from my vision, I lost, my peaceful walk ended in cruelty, death, and a sick-twisted display of morbid “art”

By now, I had given up, I just wanted to fade into nothing, but then, some sort of prompt, from an old, JRPG appeared just below my vision as I looked at the display sat before me, it was simple sentence, but it carved me to my core, and all it said was 

“Paws seem suitable, for someone who always cried”

Then the nightmare took a sickening turn, the final nail in the coffin which shock me awake, It was still night, the moon was barely peaking over the houses outside my window, and I was breathing like I had all the oxygen sucked from my body, I was drenched in sweat, my heart was pounding, yet felt hollow in my chest, and I didn’t want to go back to sleep

This nightmare is something that latches onto me, not because of all the horrors that happened, but because I was happy for a moment. I was at peace and my surroundings, while unfamiliar, were serene and beautiful, and when I went back to check on girls, I almost felt like a hero, running into danger.

but I wasn’t.. I failed them, they never existed, just nameless faces conjured up by my subconscious but still I feel the guilt and sickness for failing them, my nightmare punished me for trying to be a hero 

 

[This retelling is gonna read like some trashy horror story from the 2010s but this is what happened a few minutes ago before I woke up]

I was seemingly alone and walking through some weird ghetto area during sunset, I was humming or singing some made up rap song which I never heard before, when suddenly I ended up back at the top of the street I just came down, this time I took a left and was heading down some nice looking tropical suburb during the night, checking out the colourful blue beach bungalows and serine vibes when I noticed two young girls suddenly run across the street and hide behind a bush as police cars came and stopped at the bottom of the street, knocking on a door to a dimly lit house and heading inside.

At first I seemingly carried on walking when I noticed one of the girls behind the bush peaking out and looking around, I originally seemed to pass the area before turning back around and seeing the kids enter a white dimly lit house. With the number and name being “Super Oak Street; number: 385”

This caused me to turn and head back towards the house with the police and enter uninvited, I was worried and thought maybe the girls were running away or needed help so I tried telling the police about the white house two houses down, then I blinked.

I was still in the house but now the police were gone and the girls were walking around it seemingly confused before heading out to the pitch black garden which seemed to stretch out towards this Japanese style wooden wall, but for some reason I left the house and began walking right of the house, back the way I came, before turning around and seeing this weird looking guy dressed in black and seemingly hiding like he was about to ambush someone, then I noticed that the police caps were discarded in the grass behind him along with their guns, radios, and a single officer laying down in the ground.

I don’t know what compelled me but I walked behind the guy and picked up one of the firearms and shot him , suddenly 5 or 6 copies of the guy came out of nowhere and began to shoot at me. **(I felt like I was in some Hotline Miami bs but I still had this feeling of needing to stay alive or at the very least find the girls.)**

Eventually I made it back to the house and noticed blood droplets leading to the garden but I immediately turned and headed out towards an unmarked car and shooting the driver, who seemed to register what happened but seemed like it was a surprise to him.

Suddenly I felt my body or at least my perspective leading me towards the house again passing through the dimly lit lounge, towards the glass sliding door and out into the darkness.

I could almost see the sun either setting or rising across the rolling fields and just by the power lines, then I kept heading towards the end of the garden, where I found discarded limbs of the girls, this filled me with absolute dread which I still feel right now, but then I began climbing up the wooden wall and found a head, just a head of some girl, discarded of some kind of roof.

By this point I could feel everything around me shifting and changing, I felt warm and sick, and I then knew I was dreaming but couldn’t change anything about the situation.

As I looked back down and saw the head, now it had limbs that were slapped together in a sloppy looking fashion, covered by a puffy pink dress, except for a pair of literal cat paws, then a string of text seemed to appear across my vision like it was out of some old video game, which I vaguely remember as “Paws seem suitable, for someone who always cried.”

Then the dream cut to something that I honestly don’t wanna think about. But it ended like I received the bad ending to some old JRPG, like I was being punished for making the wrong decision.

[This nightmare happened just a few minutes ago. I’ve had nightmares of a similar tone but this one shakes me the most because all the horrible things happened when I tried to help and do the right thing, like maybe if I left things alone all the horrible stuff wouldn’t have happened.]