u/Mayo_Burrito

We were together for about 7 months, it was great at the start and things slowly declined as i expect because things can’t be lovey dicey all the time or maybe im wrong to think that. We were arguing so much, and it was hard because i never saw him a lot my parents are strict i saw him like once a week.

One day while i was at work it got just all too hard, i was trying to explain how i didn’t like when he would say “i miss the way you used to be” how i never save his snaps in chat anymore and i tried explaining that i always love your snaps and i still save them i just didn’t save that one i suppose. I tried explaining with being calm and he just says im not arguing with you, and i kept saying we aren’t arguing we are just talking. Kept insisting that we are talking not arguing and all i get is nup and alrighty, so i crashed the fuck out. Quickly broke up with him and said your being very childish.

He asked if i was serious i said yes and he kept saying how much he’s done for me after everything ive done for you sort of stuff. We broke up, and i followed this guy i used to talk to who he wasn’t sure about and downloaded hinge out of anger, we got back together like 24hrs later and i deleted that app and unfollowed tht guy. I said id try again with you and im sorry and that i didn’t mean to hurt you and i think us texting wasn’t helping so i thought let’s meet in person. He “takes me back” and makes me say thankyou and is surprised that i don’t have “basic fucking manners” and was very angry about the whole thankyou thing. Everything was fine in person, i tried explain that this guy and i never did anything (i knew him before i knew my now ex) and that we texted once and he was a bit too old for me and that was that. He throws my phone across the car, because i just wanted to show i have nothing to hide.

And when we broke up with first time he messaged a friend of his which is his mates girlfriend to talk about what happened, i was a bit jealous as he always talks highly of her and i told him i just wish you saw me the way you see her, and all he said was that atleast she understands.

We broke up the second time because his friend found my hinge account from last time which was deleted but must’ve still been on hinge.

And all his friends unfollowed me, i feel bad for what happened and i now know what not to do but i really felt like i was the mature one in this relationship when we argued i know i made mistakes but he made mistakes too. I think at the end of the day the age gap wasn’t realistic. I don’t know how i should feel. How should i feel? people have said he took advantage of my age and he shouldn’t have talked to me like that because i am 19. But i just feel like everything’s my fault. He asked for change from me when got back together and i thought i did but he still didn’t think i was changing or trying but i really was.

ok firstly we haven’t asked eachother out seriously but we are pretty damn near it. we met through friends who we no longer talk too which is a long story, but we got along like a house on fire, i really like him and he really likes me too, we were a bit hesitant in dating because of our age gap but it’s really not that bad right? lol

anyway my dad is super strict like old traditional italian and my bf is covered in tattoos but i told him the upsides of that he’s fully sober. but sometimes im not allowed to see him and honestly my dad doesn’t want me to see him at all but im genuinely scared i dont know of what but my dad makes it hard i think i live in a toxic household but maybe im just in denial, i cant talk to my dad, my bf is quite understanding about me not being able to always see him but he can get upset and it just makes me feel so guilty, my bf would say things fight for us fight for me but im genuinely scared to talk to my dad.

Secondly, we fight over the fact my bf doesn’t think im the same anymore, he said you don’t flirt like you used too, you don’t initiate conversations or dates and thinks i give up easily, it hurts that he thinks that way but i am scared to confront my dad to even say i want to go out with my bf. and i don’t think ive changed either so it’s a bit confusing maybe we just got out the honeymoon phase but idk if that’s just a myth and people say you should never get out of that phase, we have been going through a lot lately too i recently broke my finger and got surgery and shits going on with my mum and my bf just has bad mental health overall i’ve told him to see someone but he doesn’t want too. He’s someone who likes to get showed off too maybe i am lame i just don’t like showing off on social media but he really wants too be i think because he’s insecure but i thought i shouldn’t have to show off if i truly love him which i do

Basically i don’t know what to do, if my dad wasn’t so strict none of this would happen and i can see my bf a lot more but my bf also has issues with me not being the same anymore. What do i fix? maybe i should stop being a pussy?