u/Moonlight_Melody123

26, 4’11. 135.8lbs

Hello! I had an aunt who was disabled and required full time care, being completely bedridden and medically complex (sepsis, T2D, arthritis, obese). This started in January and I took care of her with the help of her oldest, 19F, who is in school full time and working part time. I also helped take care of her teenage boys (14, 16) during this time. I’m in grad school and working one full time job and two part time jobs to further financially support myself, her, and her 3 children.

She unfortunately passed a month ago and I’m trying to navigate all the changes happening at home. Supporting the boys through school, supporting the oldest with obtaining guardianship, potentially looking at dual-guardianship so she isn’t carrying this alone. Staying ontop of my own work and studies. Etc.

I stepped on the scale for the first time in a while. The most I’ve ever weighed was 120lbs. Lo and behold I was up at 140lbs, officially being overweight for my height.

I’m almost down 5lbs (CICO) but cant help but feel stuck in the sense that Ive let myself gained so much in a semester and a half. I’m aware of the health complications that come with being overweight/obese and I cant help but get nervous when the numbers are that high. I’m happy my weight is gradually decreasing but I cant help but feel anxious.

My aunt has been in the hospital since January and was sent home a few weeks ago due to Medicare no longer covering her bed in a SNF. Her oldest daughter(19) and I(26) have been her caregiver since she came back. She works nights and I work mornings so it ‘works’ (due to my aunt’s complexities (T2D, RA, Class 3 Obesity, bedridden, incontinence), she requires 2 people to care for her, specifically for brief changes but we make it work without hurting our backs too much)

School starts back up in August. The oldest is going for her bachelors, I’m going for my masters. My classes aren’t available online and her classes are mostly only available in person. She was able to secure two online courses.

Theres no one else in the household who can help. My uncle was deported years ago, my dad (my aunt’s brother) is mentally checked out/does not help with the day-to-day caregiving, the only other two people in the house are her teenage sons who will be in school as well.

Ive brought this up with the social worker and she goes, “That’s… a problem. I’ll have to look into it.” And I’m yet to hear back. Unfortunately my aunt’s insurance (Medicare/Humana, Medicaid) only covers for a caregiver to come in once a week for 4 hours.

Location: Las Vegas, NV

I don’t want to be a hero. I didn’t want to step up. I’m 26. I want to live my life. I want to travel, I want to do well in grad school (just finished my first year in May), I want to hang out with my friends without having to worry about any caregiving duties.

My uncle was deported a few years back. My aunt has been hospitalized since January and was just discharged as Medicare is no longer covering her bed in a SNF. Our options were to pay $600/day out of pocket or take her home. Now she’s home bound and bedridden. She’s medically complex and requires basically 24/7 care.

The only family she has is my dad (her older brother) and myself. She has 3 kids, teenagers. The oldest is 19. My dad has mentally checked out as of late December and is never home, he basically moved in with his girlfriend, only coming home to spend a few nights when they fight, going back to her house when things settle down. He maybe pops in once a week to, “check in” but all of the hands on caregiving is on myself and the 19 year old. I do NOT want her minor children involved in any hands on caregiving related duties. This whole ordeal is traumatizing enough.

I went from working 1 job to support myself to working 3 jobs and supporting my cousins and aunt while in school. The oldest works a minimum wage job and contribute where she can but I try to encourage her to save her money. I’m the only one who can drive. The oldest has her permit but financially, I can’t afford to add her to my insurance, assuming we end up sharing my car.

My aunt hasn’t even been home a month and I’m already so exhausted. I don’t want to be a hero. I just want to be a grad student.

I know, I know, “No one asked for this,” “You’re not the only one suffering” “This is hard for your aunt/cousins too.” etc. etc. I always hear it when I try to vent to my friends and families. Please just let me be selfish and let me vent.

I don’t want to be a hero. I didn’t want to step up. I’m 26. I want to live my life. I want to travel, I want to do well in grad school (just finished my first year in May), I want to hang out with my friends without having to worry about any caregiving duties.

My uncle was deported a few years back. My aunt has been hospitalized since January and was just discharged as Medicare is no longer covering her bed in a SNF. Our options were to pay $600/day out of pocket or take her home. Now she’s home bound and bedridden. She’s medically complex and requires basically 24/7 care.

The only family she has is my dad (her older brother) and myself. She has 3 kids, teenagers. The oldest is 19. My dad has mentally checked out as of late December and is never home, he basically moved in with his girlfriend, only coming home to spend a few nights when they fight, going back to her house when things settle down. He maybe pops in once a week to, “check in” but all of the hands on caregiving is on myself and the 19 year old. I do NOT want her minor children involved in any hands on caregiving related duties. This whole ordeal is traumatizing enough.

I went from working 1 job to support myself to working 3 jobs and supporting my cousins and aunt while in school. The oldest works a minimum wage job and contribute where she can but I try to encourage her to save her money. I’m the only one who can drive. The oldest has her permit but financially, I can’t afford to add her to my insurance, assuming we end up sharing my car.

My aunt hasn’t even been home a month and I’m already so exhausted. I don’t want to be a hero. I just want to be a grad student.

I know, I know, “No one asked for this,” “You’re not the only one suffering” “This is hard for your aunt/cousins too.” etc. etc. I always hear it when I try to vent to my friends and families. Please just let me be selfish and let me vent.

I (26) live at home with my dad, aunt(late 40s), and three cousins (19, 16, 14). My aunt got sepsis and was admitted in January. She’s been bedridden since. She was transferred to a skilled nursing facility in May. Her Medicare is no longer covering her bed so she was sent home yesterday.

She is medically complex (obesity, T2D, Rheumatoid Arthritis, cant walk/bedridden, incontinence, needs PT/OT). We have a hospital bed and a hoyer lift. She was dropped off at home while I was at work (my cousins were home) and there were no instructions/trainings/guidance on how to care for her.

Her social worker is trying to help find an in-home nurse/caretaker.

The oldest and I have had to change her diaper twice today and it just isn’t practical. It’s a two person job since one of us has to turn her. The second diaper leaked due to not being put on properly. We have no training. It is nothing like changing a baby’s diaper.

She does not have a stable caregiver. The oldest and I work and are will be in college come fall. Ive been working two jobs and just accepted a remote position to make sure her kids and I are ok financially. I do not want her minor children involved in caretaker duties.

We were not given any information as we are not power of attorney or her emergency contact which is my dad (her older brother). My dad has not lived in the home since December - he moved in with a girlfriend Ive met a handful of times.

It is just me and the oldest taking care of her until the social worker can find someone and it does not seem like a safe environment for her. I don’t know what services are available and I’m so tired.

The only bright side is that she is home and that Medicare is willing to cover at-home physical/occupational therapy.

Location: Las Vegas, NV

Location: Las Vegas, NV.

First time having my own insurance since aging out of my dad’s. I have MetLife.

I went to Absolute Dental for half of a deep cleaning and x-rays, got charged $437 at the time of service. Got my EOB a few weeks later and saw that my patient responsibly is $161. It appears I was overcharged by $276.

I called my insurance/Metlife for verification and they told me that I should have only paid $161 and would need to contact Absolute Dental for a refund. I can’t seem to get a hold of anyone for a refund of the difference. I tried calling all the numbers I can get a hold of and it’s always an automatic voice saying, “No one is available to take your call right now. Please leave a message and someone will get back to you.” Or “All of our offices are currently closed. Please leave a message.” I’m tempted to walk back into the dental office myself to speak to a human. I’m frustrated and in this economy, I can’t just give $276.

I just need to ask, is this typical? Can I withhold payment until after I get my EOB??

EOB/Bill in comments!!

My aunt has been in the hospital with sepsis. The antibiotics make her insanely nauseous to the point that she is not able to hold any food down. She has been hospitalized with sepsis since January. She is given albumin, zolfran, daptomyci, mieran, and climinax. She has not been able to keep solid food down since she was admitted; everything makes her throw up. The nurse came in with her dinner tray. My aunt asked her to take it away. The nurse removed the cover, and just the smell alone had her gagging.

She stays hydrated via water and juices and will eat very little (a few bites, less than a quarter of solid food). She has an IV giving her nutrients. She had a nasal feeding tube for a moment while she was intubated two months back. Once she was medically cleared, the feeding tube was removed and the medical staff emphasized that she needs to eat orally. They told her that she needs to get back to eating solid foods to get better and stronger. I tell the nurses that she literally can't hold anything down due to the strong antibiotics. The staff gave her anti-nausea medicine before offering her food, and it didn't work.

The nurses then tell my family and me that while we're visiting, to encourage her to eat, and I'm just here like, ?!?!?! She physically can't keep anything down. Everything she eats orally gets thrown up within half an hour of consumption.

My family and I have tried everything. Feeding her, cooking her favorite meals at home, and bringing them, bring her favorite fast food, etc. She can't hold anything down. She cries because she can't eat. We are so tired, and we don't know what to do.