u/Novel-Rabbit8914

I messed up. I never failed to pay my dues but I overspent the last 2 years. But just year, I experienced a significant medical event that landed me a 6 month hospital stay, and another 4 months recovering at home. I resigned from work to spare my employer the dilemma of having to decide whether to let me go or not since he couldnt quite figure out what he wanted. Fast forward into the present, I am still without work, and it seems theres no guarantee Ill get a job in the next 5 or 6 months. My checking account is down to its last $18.00 and my CCs are already 3 months past due. I just received an email from BOA today informing me that theyre closing one of my credit lines. Everything just went downhill since I got sick, but thankfully my mom helps me with my rent and food. I feel scared, lost and totally hopeless. Not sure why this happened to me, it cant be karma - I havent crossed anyone my whole life nor do I have enemies. Last time I went to an urgent care to get my blood samples taken for an upcoming medical procedure and I couldnt get out of the building because I couldnt afford to pay for the exit parking meter.... Im really considering bankruptcy but it feels so contrary to what I believe in.

I messed up. I never failed to pay my dues but I overspent the last 2 years. But just year, I experienced a significant medical event that landed me a 6 month hospital stay, and another 4 months recovering at home. I resigned from work to spare my employer the dilemma of having to decide whether to let me go or not since he couldnt quite figure out what he wanted. Fast forward into the present, I am still without work, and it seems theres no guarantee Ill get a job in the next 5 or 6 months. My checking account is down to its last $18.00 and my CCs are already 3 months past due. I just received an email from BOA today informing me that theyre closing one of my credit lines. Everything just went downhill since I got sick, but thankfully my mom helps me with my rent and food. I feel scared, lost and totally hopeless. Not sure why this happened to me, it cant be karma - I havent crossed anyone my whole life nor do I have enemies. Last time I went to an urgent care to get my blood samples taken for an upcoming medical procedure and I couldnt get out of the building because I couldnt afford to pay for the exit parking meter.... Im really considering bankruptcy but it feels so contrary to what I believe in.

Edit: I was making around 90k/year before. My total debt is around $40k

I was admitted in the hospital last year where I stayed for 6 months and another 4 months doing physical therapy so I can walk again. I lost my job because of it and now have $18.00 in my checking account. I tried calling Chase today to try and ask them if I can postpone my dues until 8 or 9 months from now, they referred me to a partner about planning etc. I think it was some credit counseling or something where they offered lowered interest rates but then even with the lowered rates I still can't pay my bills, I explained I have $18.00 bucks left.

Not sure where to go from here with my credit card bills. Do I just ignore the bills? I mean I tried calling and they were of no help.

April of last year, I was in and out of the doctors office. My physician couldn't quite figure out what the problem was; I'd get better, then get sick again. She decided to draw blood for more testing. And then one morning she called "You tested positive for HIV".

I called my boss, told him I was diagnosed with a chronic disease (but I assured him I'll live) and requested permission to leave so I can clear my mind. Drove around Los Angeles to think about things. Felt like I was in a dream. That night I slept soundly, and the next day I have moved on. I embraced my diagnosis fully. I think me being educated (I have a medical background) helped a lot. I know HIV today is manageable, and diabetes is probably worse since it displays symptoms even when managed.

But it doesn't end there - what I in fact had was full-blown AIDS (CD4 count under 100). Add to that pancreatitis, pneumonia, disseminated tuberculosis (a very severe, life-threatening form of tuberculosis), sepsis. I was very, very sick. I ended up in the hospital for 6 months where I then lost my ability to walk. I had about a 50% chance of not making it out alive. But I did, and have since then been cleared by public health (TB management), by physical therapy (so I can walk again), and I am now undetectable.

And now that I am undetectable, HIV is not that bad. In fact some things in my life have improved. My relationships with others are better (I am trying to be a better person). I was the type who'd shoulder everything alone, stay silent and calm before adversities. I was confident in my ability to withstand whatever life threw my way. I never depended on ANYBODY. I didn't need anybody. Everyone can go away and Id survive. I didn't even tell anyone I was in the hospital until the 2nd month. I managed. I said, If I'm going down, I am going down alone. But after recovering, I realized that this is a second chance I cannot afford to squander. I decided to accept myself fully, which then allowed me to accept others. I feel so much happier. All is good.

There is that one lingering question though, how did I get it? I wasn't fond of anal sex. I only had anal sex 4 times in my life, but 3 was unprotected (however I did it with someone I was dating then). Maybe that's just luck. But I do not ponder on it too much. As I have said, all is good.

To conclude, I want to encourage people to be more educated. I think education can help cushion the fall. Some people grieve for a long time after receiving their diagnosis. And while it is okay to loathe yourself, hate yourself, be sad or depressed, remember one thing, most people (if not all) who caught it, have later learned that HIV is not so bad, and you can bet your ass you'll be one of those people. Sure we'd rather not have it, but it's not that bad (at least for me, its not that bad). The world has come a long way. HIV is getting more support. There is much to be optimistic about.