u/Ok-Lobster3883

So I have had this irrational crush that keeps reappearing even after I seem to have conquered it and forgotten about her.

I (27M) was a TA in her (23F) physics recitation for a semester. During the time I was her TA everything went normal and I didn't have a contact with her outside the classroom. I obviosly noticed her (she is beautiful) and rembered her face.

Months later I keep seeing her at the university gym where I usually go to work out since I am still in grad school. I usually ignore my former students when I am on campus, because I am bad at remembering faces and names, and I don't want to offend or seem rude to some of them, so I am rude to everyone equally instead lol. I know it's stupid but she has this light to her that makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

I have changed gyms, partly because of this, and there have been periods where I haven't seen her for months. Recently due to my schedule, I have been going at the university gym, and in various instances I have seen her there. We made eye contact and said hi on multiple occasions. The first time she blushed (I probably did too). I didn't expect this to still be a thing for me.

During this time I have dated other women, but whenever I see her at the gym I feel the same way about her. It's very irrational, and I don't want to look creepy if I express interest in her beyond acknowledging her at the gym. On the other hand, I don't want to regret not doing it. What should I do?

I am a guy in my late 20s and I have come to the realization that marriage might not be for me.

Some background: I am pursuing a career that is very fulfilling for me, and I can say that it has been a dream for me to be in this position when I was younger. I have hobbies and relationships that bring joy to my life. In fact, at times I feel like the only constraint for pursuing my interests is time.

I have had a few major relationships in my 20s, but they have been unfulfilling despite the fact that I have cared deeply for those women. I have realized that I enjoy meeting someone new, getting to know them and having fun, but anything beyond that is suffocating for me. Especially, I have noticed that after a few months, my presence, time, and effort somehow are taken for granted and more is required. In one of these relationships, which was in my early 20s, I was fully invested in this girl. We did long distance for a while, and that put a lot of strain in my life and relationships with my friends and family. By the end of the relationship I had lost almost everything that brought joy to my life, things that defined me as a man, and was depressed for a while. I tried being a relationship one more time and I noticed similar patterns. The second time it was easier because I was starting to become more aware of these things, but it wasn't until I spent about a year alone, that I was able to process everything and understand what went wrong.

Ultimately, I have realized that single life brings me a level of peace that I just can't have in a long term relationship. I enjoy waking up on a Saturday, after a long week of work, having no commitments or plans outside of doing what makes me happy and brings me peace. When in a relationship I always felt like I had an obligation to do things that made my woman happy, and ended up neglecting myself. Even when going on vacations, as a man I felt like it was my duty to make my woman happy. Recently, I traveled abroad alone, and I can say it was the most enjoyable vacation I have had in my life. Up to this point it has been fairly straightforward, and it was easier to accept the fact that I am not the type of guy who wants to spend the rest of my life with a woman.

However, I want to experience being a father, but bringing a child in this world when I know that I am probably not going to be with their mother for the rest of my life feels wrong. Anyone else in a similar position?

I am in my late 20s and I have come to the realization that marriage might not be for me.

Some background: I am pursuing a career that is very fulfilling for me, and I can say that it has been a dream for me to be in this position when I was younger. I have hobbies and relationships that bring joy to my life. In fact, at times I feel like the only constraint for pursuing my interests is time.

I have had a few major relationships in my 20s, but they have been unfulfilling despite the fact that I have cared deeply for those women. I have realized that I enjoy meeting someone new, getting to know them and having fun, but anything beyond that is suffocating for me. Especially, I have noticed that after a few months, my presence, time, and effort somehow are taken for granted and more is required. In one of these relationships, which was in my early 20s, I was fully invested in this girl. We did long distance for a while, and that put a lot of strain in my life and relationships with my friends and family. By the end of the relationship I had lost almost everything that brought joy to my life, things that defined me as a man, and was depressed for a while. I tried being a relationship one more time and I noticed similar patterns. The second time it was easier because I was starting to become more aware of these things, but it wasn't until I spent about a year alone, that I was able to process everything and understand what went wrong.

Ultimately, I have realized that single life brings me a level of peace that I just can't have in a long term relationship. I enjoy waking up on a Saturday, after a long week of work, having no commitments or plans outside of doing what makes me happy and brings me peace. When in a relationship I always felt like I had an obligation to do things that made my woman happy, and ended up neglecting myself. Even when going on vacations, as a man I felt like it was my duty to make my woman happy. Recently, I traveled abroad alone, and I can say it was the most enjoyable vacation I have had in my life. Up to this point it has been fairly straightforward, and it was easier to accept the fact that I am not the type of guy who wants to spend the rest of my life with a woman.

However, I want to become a father, but bringing a child in this world when I know that I am probably not going to be with their mother for the rest of my life feels wrong. Are there any men who never got married or started a family, who regretted this and why?

I (27M) have been living with this guy (27M) for almost a year. I would consider him to be a friend before this event, since we have been knowing each other for a few years before that. Recently, his parents were visiting from India and needed a place to stay. He asked me whether they could stay with us since renting an apartment for them would be very expensive where we live. He said that it would be for 1 month maximum and they would be travelling most of that time. He offered to cover 75 percent of rent and utilities for that period, which I thought was nice. I was reluctant to agree since I am extremely busy and when I go home I need my space to decompress and occasionally will have people over. Having his parents around would be a nuisance but I decided to accept mostly to accommodate him and preserve our relationship as roommates since I signed a lease with him for next year as well before this happened. The money that he offered wasn't much and it basically would cover for the meals I would have out since his mother would be cooking in our apartment. I figured I would give them their space and make them feel comfortable.

Fast forward, I found out that they will be actually staying for 45 days, and he had been lying about this the entire time. Out of those 45 days they spent a week travelling, but they have been staying with us pretty much all day. This felt like a betrayal bc I already went out of my way to accommodate his parents. There were little things before this that could be considered red flags, but relationships with roommates are never perfect. They cook 3 meals, and generally behave like they own the place, messing with the thermostat during hot days, being loud early in the morning. Also, this dude has turned the living room into a storage unit, leaving all their luggage, and some of their belongings scattered across the living room.

I recently confronted him about this, especially the fact that he wasn't transparent about his parents stay, and occupying common spaces. Since then he has been extra annoying by bringing up little things that were totally okay before this happened. Like he will complain about me having some of my belongings in a storage space, when 3/4 of the same storage space has his own things. How should I handle this moving forward, and could I have done things differently when confronting him?