u/Ok_Penalty_1618

F22, bored plus not able to sleep.

I'm very insecure about my tan body especially since you are a girl, you get criticised a lot by people even when half of the population has a tan skin.

Hello everyone, I’m from the northeast part of India. Today, I want to share something to help me become a little better. I have many insecurities and my skin is one of them, the part where I live in is very different from the India most of all of you know. Especially the looks, most of the people are pale and looks Chinese or Korean but I look different I have tan skin not beautiful. I’m not here to receive sympathy from anyone, I’m here to take advice how can I overcome it. I have been judged since I was child, I hated my skin and looks too much that I used to hate others tan skin like me when I was a child because people made me believe that pale or fair skin is more beautiful even the people who were dark used to tease me. I hope my parents protected me from them. I was very thin when I was a child that my relatives and older people and children of my age used to call me nyipak which means outsiders it’s mostly refer to mainland Indians, just to mock me or tease me. Now, I’m little healthy but it has also become a problem I’m not fat but my mother always comments something about my body. Tan skin and my body is one of insecurities I have and I have many more for example academic studies, not being confident and speaking, boys, sexual insecurities etc. I feel like I need some therapy but Indians children mostly depend on their parents financially. I’m 21 but I’m not financially independent till now. I’m not showing anyone but mentally I’m suffering but I don’t have courage to even take my life. And please don’t think I didn’t tried to talk with my parents they only heard my loud voices but never listened to me. My mother was going to throw a brick at me when I tried to talk to her but it’s my fault I was shouting. I also tried many times before that. Now, I just think sometimes how will I face this world in future when I have already accepted myself as failure.

One of my uncle was working in the field till sunset. After finishing, he was about to leave when he saw two men coming with something like a torch. It was very dark so he couldn’t see clearly. He thought maybe they were thieves coming for fish.

We have two types of field, one is plain and the other one is a bit narrow because it’s on the mountain side. This happened in the mountain field. He was in a small bamboo house and started shouting, “Who are you?” again and again, but they didn’t say anything.

As they came closer, they started becoming taller and taller. Then the light he thought was a torch became very bright, like it was covering the whole sky. He got really scared but still tried to be brave.

His car was down the hill, so he went back inside the house, took his gun and shot 2–3 times in the sky. Then he lit a fire and ran towards the car. While driving, he was so scared that he met with an accident. Luckily, another village was nearby and the villagers came and saved him.

This happened in 2024. After that, he never stays late in the field anymore. My grandmother says that usually that kind of thing comes alone, but maybe because he was brave, it came in two.

Place: Arunachal Pradesh (INDIA)
A state where tribals lives .

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