u/Ok_Reaction_5890

i hate it when ppl treat nb as simply a 3rd gender that is neither male nor female, or as lacking a gender. nb is an umbrella term for any gender identity that isnt strictly male nor female. and yes, u can be a nb trans woman/man, or a nb woman/man in general! nb trans women dont have to call themsleves only transfem bc they r nb and nb trans men dont have to call themselves transmasc bc they r nb, u dont have to be a binary trans woman/man to be a trans woman/man...

presenting feminine and having a feminine body to me isnt just about how i like looking; it's actually gender-affirming to me just like how presenting masculine or having a masculine body feels gender-affirming to most transmasculine people and trans men. and unlike how presenting feminine or having a feminine body makes most transmasculine people and trans men feel dysphroic, presenting masculine or having a masculine body makes me feel dysphoric. this is also why i dont want to medically transition

i believe that this is because i'm 1) genderfluid/androgyne and 2) i'm like... an effeminate, twink-lite femme before i am a "man". 1 way to explain how my gender works as a "man" is that if i was in a room with several other people and we were suddenly told that men should stand together in 1 corner and women in another, while i wouldnt stand with the women i would also not stand with the men either. i suppose that another way my gender as a "man" could be described is that i'm a "man", not a man

now, im not trying invalidate any transmasc people or trans men who want to present masculine, have a masculine body, or medically transition. if thats whats best for you, awesome. i just wonder if there are any other transmasculine people or trans men out there who experience their gender similarly to me

presenting feminine and having a feminine body to me isnt just how i like looking the most; it's actually gender-affirming to me just like how presenting masculine or having a masculine body feels gender-affirming to most transmasculine people and trans men. and unlike how presenting feminine or having a feminine body makes most transmasculine people and trans men feel dysphroic, presenting masculine or having a masculine body makes me feel dysphoric

i believe that this is because i'm 1) genderfluid/androgyne and 2) i'm like... an effeminate, twink-lite femme before i am a "man". 1 way to explain how my gender works as a "man" is that if i was in a room with several other people and we were suddenly told that men should stand together in 1 corner and women in another, while i wouldnt stand with the women i would also not stand with the men either. i suppose that another way ny gender as a "man" could be described is that i'm a "man", not a man

so ive known intuitively that im bisexual for a very long time, and have always resonated with the bisexual label. but until very recently, i struggled with the feeling that i wasnt like, "truly" bisexual because i wasnt (and still am not) all that attracted to the vast majority of the women i met irl while being very much attracted to men i met irl. i know now that this is because im primarily attracted to masculinity, and that the reason why ive never been all that attracted to the women i meet irl but have very much been attracted to the men ive met irl is because the vast majority of the women ive met irl tend to look very feminine (or at the very least too feminine for me to be attracted to) while the vast majority of the men ive met irl tend to look very masculine (or at the very least masculine enough for me to be attracted to)

side note; as as a bisexual woman, this is why i strongly dislike the common notion that bisexual women with a preference for men are somehow actually straight and are just pretending to be bisexual to feel special. i was a bisexual woman who thought that they preferred men for a while simply because i met very few women irl who were my type. honestly, if straight people can be picky and still be considered straight then bisexuals should be allowed to be picky and still be considered bisexual