We don’t inherently distrust them because they’re not real enough, but because they are too close to why we dream.
I should have known better than to try tell a joke during the T20 World Cup Finals.
Despite my begging and pleading, all the lifeboats refused after taking one look at the obese woman.
I waited for the third positive thing, since that was the assignment, when I realized they did list three.
Not yet fifty, but I move like someone twice that age.
If I ration then carefully enough, I'll have dinner for the next little while.
And if anybody calls you out on it, act as though you have no idea what they're talking about.
And the uneventful commute has proven that today is no exception.
Not only did nobody notice, even fewer people cared.
It was then I realized he was a MAD man.
I never thought those words would be echoed by my father before I sent him to an assisted living facility.
And, depending on how arrogantly he's portrayed, may require a giant prick.
For starters, the "stag film" he chose was Disney's Bambi.
I'd have been more inclined to believe him if I didn't smell the alcohol on his breath.
I don't think I could handle another one of my mother's nonsensical, animal-related questions.
They just simply forgot I even existed.
All I know is, the very next day, he installed locks on all of our closet doors.
Unsurprisingly, he's still single, but he has acquired quite the collection of restraining orders.
It's gotten so bad that we feel the two will be reunited sooner rather than later.
"OK, while 'poop' is technically correct, the answer I was looking for was 'water'."