u/Particular-Answer526

I genuinely prefer modest/hijabi women when it comes to seeking marriage, but I can’t lie the ones i meet and talk to with fillers, enhancements or perfect makeup etc while still carrying themselves modestly are 100% my type. That mix of elegant in public but clearly knowing they attract me is dangerous.

What surprised me after dating/talking to a few potentials in London though is how different some of them were privately compared to how people assume they are publicly. A few admitted they actually liked the contrast and hated always being put into the “innocent good girl” box. In conversations they lean more to wanting to feel desired differently and explore a side of themselves people would never expect just from looking at them.

Women, especially hijabi women, do you feel misunderstood in that sense?

Ok so I was dating a girl for a while and we both understood this was a haram relationship. She’s Arab and a hijabi so I just had to cut it off and repent. We were both young and kinda wild, she eventually then told me she was getting an arranged marriage soon and that we should stop talking altogether.

I only used to see her posts through insta and I found out she got married a few months ago.

she’s apparently gone into this marriage with a very pious man and I genuinely don’t know if I should be saying anything or just leave it alone.

I know people change and repent but we were so bad together like things I can’t type out on here but basically we shared kinks and recently she got in contact with me and she made me park across the street so she could sneak out of her house looking very modest, then get in my car and show me the outfit she had on underneath and it made her so excited, she literally begged me to not treat her like a good girl as that’s how she’s portrayed at home.

She texts me every now and again saying she misses the experiences, I know how she is in general but now I’m stuck on what I should do or if I should say something to the man she married or do I have no right to even mention anything about her.

Conflicted 😐

EDIT: FYI / I don’t plan on saying anything, it was just a thought which is why I even posted on here.

Ok so I was dating a girl for a while and we both understood this was a haram relationship and had to cut it off and repent we were both young and kinda wild, she eventually then told me she was getting an arranged marriage soon and that we should stop talking altogether.

I only used to see her posts through insta and I found out she got married last month.

she’s apparently gone into this marriage with a very pious man and I genuinely don’t know if I should be saying anything or just leave it alone.

I know people change and repent but we were so bad together like things I can’t type out on here and she used to make me park across the street so she could sneak out of her house looking very modest, then get in my car and show me the outfit she had on underneath and it used to make her so excited, so I know how she is in general but now I’m stuck on what I should do with the man she married or do I have no right to even mention anything in her past.

Conflicted 😐

I’m from London originally but living in the Middle East now and I’ve noticed i usually do get eye contact from women I find very attractive, usually modest hijabis. They’re covered up properly but still at the gym wear leggings with long tops/jackets etc and now that it’s hot eve try ones more casual and now when they see me I’ll get the occasional salams.

I’m not super conservative myself but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to flirt or speak to some of them. Most the time I notice this at the gym or food shopping in the mall and it’s always awkward because there’s too many people around so it’s not exactly easy to just talk naturally like back home in London.

Question for the women mainly if you’re giving a guy eye contact/smiling like this, how would you actually want him to approach you without making it weird?

So I’m in a Muslim conservative country, I get this attention from the women here as I kinda stand out as being born and raised in London and my style is a bit different.

Ive been noticing these looks from the women here and I’m not sure how to take it as some are very attractive and ive started to become interested in these hijabi type girls but I’m not ‘conservative’ at all.

Do you think I should treat them how I would back home? It’s hard to tell if they’re interested in the attention I would give them or they just like looking !

I usually comment on these topics and get a lot of responses from women in this community, and I’m often surprised by how some describe their marriages and husbands. It’s made me think about it more and want to get different opinions.

On a personal level, I tend to be drawn to more modest presenting hijabi women which is part of why I find these conversations interesting

A lot of the issues that come up seem to be around family involvement, in-laws, and expectations in marriage. I’m trying to understand if this is more cultural or something more general in Muslim marriages.

& myself I’m Somali born and raised in the UK but currently in Middle East and I’ve lived there for a period of time, so I’ve seen a bit from both sides. A lot of the experiences I hear tend to be from Asian backgrounds, but I’m open to understanding the differences rather than assuming anything.

Just curious what others think about it.