u/PrincessTuvstarr

Hej!

Jag beställde ett par grejer på nätet häromveckan som skulle levererats i måndags eller tisdags med EarlyBird. I tisdags fick jag bara uppdateringen att det inte kunde levereras och att de meddelar mig om en ny leveranstid när de kan.

Jag har fortfarande inte fått en ny leveranstid.

Jag tar alltid internet-köp på faktura, den billigaste möjliga varianten bara för att jag vill få varorna innan jag betalar. I detta fallet blev det "faktura 10 dagar" då det var billigast.

Fakturan ska betalas nästa vecka, men vad gör jag om jag inte har fått mina varor än? Jag vill ju inte behöva betala extra för förlängd fakturatid bara för att EarlyBird har sjabblat till det?

Har försökt kontakta EarlyBird och hoppas att de svarar snabbt.

Jag kommer inte använda mig av EarlyBird fler gånger.

Någon som vet vad jag kan göra/har rätt att göra? Jag vill inte riskera att hamna i nån skit.

Jag har försökt googla, kontakta EarlyBirds "chatt-bot" som bara hänvisar mig till att jag ska förlänga fakturan osv.

Hi!

I would like to hear experiences and thoughts from other people, and to know that I'm not alone in my struggles.

I grew up with both my parents, where my mom was (and still is)... Special. You never know what kinda mood she's in. It has gotten better, but as a kid/teen/young adult it was hard. Early in my life I started struggling with mental health issues, and at 21 I got diagnosed with ADD (with indications of autism). My teen years were a nice mix of anxiety, eating disorders and self harm.

Between ages 6-15 I was severely bullied at school, and at home I grew up with a "special needs"-sibling who took a lot of focus from my parents.

My mom have always been very supportive in the bullying situation, and she did everything she could to help me. She's done a lot for me in my life, but at the same time she's been awful. (Sidenote; isn't it funny how I need to praise her before I criticize her?)

About my mental health... It's been incredibly tough.

I was raised with the mentality of "powering through". Yes, they cut me some slack in some ways. But generally my mother couldn't face my struggles, and it often ended up in us (her) fighting. Like when she threatened to sell my horse if I didn't "quit that silly eating disorder crap". Or all the times she told me that "she and dad have asked themselves so many times what they've done wrong for me to end up like this". Let's just say it's been a struggle.

Fast forward to present day; I have a 15 year old stepdaughter and some time ago we learned that she's been struggling with mental health issues for some time. Her main issues is depression and anxiety, and she's now under evaluation for ADHD and autism.

Me, her dad and her mother communicate a lot, and we have a good connection with her mother. Me and the mother have talked a lot, and we've had pretty similar upbringings when it comes to our mothers.

With all of this happening with their daughter, they've gotten instructions from the psych team on how to handle her and her issues. And like ger mother said; "Both you and me have to abandon everything we learned from our own mothers, ignore our learned instincts and do the opposite of what we were taught in this."

And she's 110% right.

I really care about my stepdaughter, and I want to do everything and anything to help her.

But I find myself too often to internally feel conflicted in how to handle it.

I would never handle her like my mother handled me. NEVER.

But, for example, the psych team has said to take the pressure off of her for now. Don't demand things, cut her a lot of slack, just let her be (withing reason). And it's generally not a problem for me/our family. But immediately my brain goes; "Oh dear, she's a teen? We can't just let her do whatever she wants. She needs to have some kind of responsibility. She can't just lazy around and not do shit just because "she's a little low". What's up with today's kids?"

And I really hate that part of myself. I hate how I'm so extremely drilled into some kind of way of thinking how " teens are supposed to be handled".

In all of this, I realize how much my mother's way of handling me had affected me, and it makes me so sad.

What if my mother would've hugged me instead of yelling at me? What if my mother would've comforted me instead of threatening to punish me?

I'm a 30 year old lady, and still feel like a little kid in so many ways when it come to stuff like this.

I don't know what I want to say with this more than it's fucking difficult to ignore everything you were taught growing up. But it's my mission to break this cycle of generational shit.

Sorry if this post is messy, I don't even know what I wanna say with this, I just need to vent and need a big fat ADHD-hug.

Hi! I'm a 30 year old woman, got diagnosed with ADD back in 2016 at 21 years old after fighting my whole childhood.

Through the years I've been battling other mental health issues too, like anxiety, depression, eating disorders etc. It's been hell in some ways, and still is sometimes.

Now, I have a stable life with an education, a full time job, a fiancee, a 2 year old son, pets, a hobby... All that which is the "normal life" and I'm so god damn grateful. Back in 2016 I didn't even think I would make it to 30, and if I did, I thought I would never have the equivalent of a "normal" life.

The thing is, even though I "shouldn't" feel stressed or whatever, I am exhausted. My fiancee is a godsend, there is not better partner than him, and he's doing so so much. And I'm still exhausted. I love my life, but I'm exhausted.

I'm on medication, and it's working very well, and I'm not in a phase where I would want to jeopardize that by trying other meds.

My problem right now is that I work shifts, I work in the medical field (not with patients though) and alternate between days (7am-3pm) and evenings (12pm-9pm), and the evening shifts are HELL.

I love my job, and I don't want to change jobs, and it's not even a choice anymore because there aren't any available jobs in my field right now. So I'm pretty much stuck here.

My problem is that when I work evenings I get so tired and unfocused. The meds stop working too early, but I can't take them later due to sleep issues and I'm not allowed to split the dose into two doses.

I just hate the feeling of doing a bad job, and I feel like a loser.

Which probably stems from being bullied from age 6 to 15 by both classmates and teachers. I just feel like I'm bad at everything, and that I have to try so much harder than everyone else, which is exhausting.

And with my hormones, it's even worse. I have PCOS, and I got my period today (day 48 in my cycle) after WEEKS of what's been feeling like a PMS like fog with constant mood swings and raging anxiety.

I've been talking to some co-workers and they understand and support me. Our boss? He doesn't understand one bit.

I live in a country where mental health isn't (shouldn't) be stigmatized anymore. It's very open minded generally. But after talking to my boss yesterday... I just feel like shit.

Hi! I've been lurking here for a while, and I'm constantly battling my own feelings towards my mother. On one hand she's making me so damn tired, but on the other hand I'm always feeling so bad for feeling like that because she has helped me A LOT (and she's NEVER late to remind me about it whenever I am trying to talk about my feelings).

I'm a 30 years old grown ass woman, but I can't help to feel disappointed an like "kid me" whenever I'm trying to make plans with my mom. Especially now that I have a kid of my own (a 2 year old), which my mother cares about a lot.

So, we live 6hrs away from my parents, and this upcoming weekend they're visiting us for my son's birthday. We live in a big city, and just a few months ago my mother talked about this thing she wanted to do when visiting us. It's an activity suiting both kids and adults, and first we talked about doing it when they visit us this summer. She seemed really excited about it.

So, when we talked on the phone a few days ago, I mentioned said activity, and that we maybe can do it this weekend when they're visiting. Immediately her mood changed, and all of a sudden it wasn't that important anymore.

It's like conversation 1. She's happy about it, she's making plans etc, is very upbeat and woohoo.

Conversation 2, some time later, it's all "Naaah, we'll see, it's a financial matter and you know your dad, I don't even knooooow if heeeeee wants to do thiiiiiis" in an annoying voice. And "why can't you, *fiancee* and *son* do it without us? Do we HAVE to go with you?"

When I talked to my dad today, he was all positive about and said that my mom hadn't even talked to him about it (as usual), but she's dragging him under the bus like always.

Instantly I get this lump in my stomach and feel like a 10 year old again.

There's been soooo many times where she's been all happy, planning stuff just for it to fall apart a few weeks later. Not even big things.

We've had horses all my life, so many times she's been NAGGING me about riding together, guilt tripping me to ride with her ("you never ride with me!" "I always have to ride alone" "I thought this was our hobby TOGETHER!!!"), and whenever we were going to ride together it always ended with me making my and HER horse ready, while she was out smoking and talking with someone, OR her cancelling in the last minute because she "has soooooo much to do!!!!".

Or when we've had it hard financially, and she has offered to help us by lending us money (like when our cat had to have an emergency visit to the vet); I was so grateful for that, and I told her that we were gonna pay her back as soon as possible. She was like "noooo! No stress! I love to help you, you know that!"

The next time I brought it up, and told her that I haven't forgotten she was like "yeah. We have to sit down and make a plan" all snarky and short.

Anyway; I hate this emotional roller coaster. It makes me so stressed and anxious. I freaking hate it. I just wanna have a normal relationship to my mom.

Vet inte riktigt hur jag ska formulera frågan. Men som titeln säger typ... Jag ser alltid en massa trådar här om folks löner, men alla som svarar tjänar alltid så sjukt mycket (enligt mig) och jag blir lite deppig. Både jag och min sambo tjänar under medel och median för våra åldersgrupper, vi bor utanför huvudstaden. Visst hade vi gärna tjänat mer, men vi hade också kunnat ha det mycket sämre. Det jag tycker är tufft är att få ihop ett sparande, och det handlar inte om att vi slösar eller unnar oss en massa, utan mer att livet har utgifter och att vi är mitt i en pågående inflation.

Och vi kan ju inte vara de enda som tjänar under 40.000 innan skatt liksom.

Jag gillar mitt jobb, och har inga planer på att byta, men jag vill gärna höra andra i liknande sits för att inte känna mig så ensam, hahah.

Jag är 30, steriltekniker och har 33.500 i grundlön (innan skatt).