u/Ro_rae

Probably my favorite meditation is a fire gazing, I use a candle personally. I light the candle with intent and watch it catch. As the candle burns, I watch as the wax melts and bubbles, then I gaze up at the orange ember, and finally, just watch the flame dance. It's so entrancing and calms me, even when I finish and look away that calm sticks.

I keep a candle lit most of the day(I blow it out if I'm going to be longer than 5 minutes) for religious reasons. You can do this with any fire, of course. Personally, the best is bonfires. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.

Anyway, who else loves this type of meditation?

Title says it all. I recently came to pantheism and want to learn more and more. So, I am wondering what books/writings I could possibly read to gain more knowledge. Do you know if there are any on Kindle? I'm loving this group, so thank you all in advance.

I had a day off from work, so I decided to go to Walmart to get a few things. I'm meandering in the pasta aisle for some lunches.

Here's the thing, though. I looked nothing like an employee. I was wearing blue shorts, a black shirt, and what my ex-friend called a "punk vest." The kind of vest with all the buttons and patches.

So, back to the point. This lady (probably about 60 something) comes up to me and asks where something is. (It's been 8 years or so, so I don't remember what it was) I look down at my outfit, then look back at her. I told her, "Ma'am I don't work here and don't know aisles that well. She stared at me for a moment, then asked again. This time, with more attitude. Luckily, there was a worker not too far away. So I said. "Ma'am I still don't work here That nice lady over there could help you". She got in a huff and left.

It was weird. Tell me how I looked like an employee? Maybe she's visually impaired? It was funny to me so I had to tell my friend about it. He got a chuckle, too.

I just joined this. I'm seeing success stories, and it's very encouraging. For a couple of months here, I was to go for a walk/run. Luckily, there are some nice trails here. But like I said, I've had a setback.

About a week ago, I drove up the road a bit to go to a nice park. I wasn't there long before feeling paranoid and scared. Popped out of nowhere. I had a major panic attack and went straight home, crying the entire way back. I've tried a couple more times on closer trails and had the same thing happen.

There is a cemetery nearby which is closer than anywhere else. BUT I was able to get there and back. Though I did cry on the way only.

I was doing great for a while for a while there and had success. So when this popped up again I have been very depressed. I will try again tomorrow and see what happens.

Thank you for reading this.

(Sorry for any bad grammar.)