u/SevereRoyal1113

⚠️ QUESTIONS ⚠️ANY GUIDANCE OR HELP IN UNDERSTANDING!!

For starters I did read the guidelines and don’t know for certain if this will go against them. If they do please don’t hesitate to remove the post (I just ask for a suggestion of another group to post to?)!

I have gone to confession over and over and over and over because I just feel so weak and I can’t seem to break this habit or even addiction if you will. I’m so uncomfortable even saying it so why do I do it?? I repeatedly fall into the sin of “self-pleasure”. I don’t want to go anywhere other than a catholic thread because I feel like I just need tough love but also to be heard out- I have questions. I don’t know where else to go.

The church and my past relationships have trained me to see any sexuality as just icky and bad even in my own marriage. Even after we do it I feel like I should be ashamed… even though it’s being done how God intended. I feel like I need to hide it. We also have 2 kids and another on the way so don’t come at my husband please. This is my problem.

As a woman of God (I try to be at least) I struggle to understand something - for some reason God made our source of “completion” impossible to hit with normal marital sex requiring outside assistance if you will. WHY?! This is where I have a really hard time - after I do it I feel so much lighter and more active and productive and like my 24/7 brain fog lifts for even an hour! And that’s really the feeling I’m seeking but can’t seem to achieve it any other way.

So back to my point- why does something so physically/mentally and SCIENTIFICALLY/BIOLOGICALLY beneficial to a woman be so sinful and against God?? He designed our bodies right?? Is it wrong if your husband does it for you? I am confused whether this is mortal or venial because I truly can’t tell if I have control.. it doesn’t feel like I do. I go through phases but like I said I have a few kids so hormones are just everywhere too.

I guess I’m just looking for anything to help me make sense of things… because those reasons seem to be what the devil uses to tempt me. I pray and pray and surrender it to Him the best way I now how but I guess I just can’t let go.. I feel sick and scared and confused. Every time the “high” fades I feel like Gods given up and like I have no business even trying anymore.. so might as well keep doing it. It’s a horrible cycle. Please be kind.. please pray for me. I’m not worthy of His love but I pray He is patient with me and helps me.

I also can’t talk to my husband about it because he would just be ashamed of me too.

EDIT: and the scrupulous OCD is telling me I’m going to lose my baby.. I understand this is a bit more intense for the page I just need help and women to talk to through this who maybe have suffered similarly

I (30F) am pregnant with my third child. While this was a huge surprise I am very excited! I’m well into my second trimester but still haven’t made any announcements. For context my sister-in-law (25F) and I have grown apart over the years and she lives out of state so I never see her really. A few years ago she basically told me she wanted to distance herself due to some mental health issues and drama between other family. I found out she had a miscarriage last year. While my heart aches for her and my brother, I want to tell her I’m expecting of course but I fear she will be unhappy with me or want to distance herself even more. Because we haven’t spoken as much and I’m afraid of her reaction I’m debating just sending a text or giving her a call. Because I’ve read that sometimes a text would allow the time to process information on their own time.

How should I go about telling her to avoid conflict?

I have felt (for probably a year+ now) as though there is a small amount of water in my left ear constantly. It even sounds like it. But it’s so deep in my ear that I can’t seem to get it out if it is water.

I’ve tried laying on that side to sleep in hopes it would come out, I’ve tried plugging my nose and popping my ears, shaking my head down, etc.! Really everything except just taking an ear wax sucker to it.

Like I said it’s been in there for at least a year and I’m just at a loss. It’s actually starting to really distract me and drive me crazy. Are there any signs I need to watch for? Is it just water? How do I get it out?! Please help!!

My husband moved us across the country to be closer to my family and save us money but mostly to help me get through my postpartum depression. We’ve been back for about 6 months and now I’m wondering about moving back? Originally we’re living in New England and now the Midwest. My people moved back to New England when I never thought it would happen so soon and now I’m having constant fomo… both here and when I was there. I’m starting to feel and realize maybe I’ve been tricking myself and pretending that I’m all better this whole time and it’s starting to really mess with me and bring back a lot of trauma and feelings from the beginning of my postpartum. I don’t know what to do.. like I’m homesick wherever I live apparently and can’t seem to be present anymore for my husband and baby. I feel so disassociated and out of body and just numb.. and lonely even though I shouldn’t I guess. Not sure if that made any sense but just needed to get it off my chest. I just wanna feel happy again