u/Snuffy_snuffy

Hey everyone, recently stumbled upon this sub and just hoping to make some new friends and see where things go.

A bit about myself: I've been on t for 5+ years and am very masc-presenting. Dog dad to my two lovely fur babies, and currently fostering a bird whose parents had left behind in my yard. I travel a lot and have been to 4 out of the 7 continents and 27 countries in total. I also play the keyboard and percussion in a local band and work for a small recording studio.

Looking for people similarly aged, and are able to hold a good conversation. If any of that sounds interesting, please don't hesitate to reach out!

I am about to graduate from university and will qualify for a 189 visa or 190 visa under the skilled migration program. In the most recent invitation round, the lowest accepted points was 75 for my profession.

Upon graduation, I will have 85 points, and if I wait to apply after one year of work experience, I will reach 95 points (+5 points for 190).

At the same time, many employers in my profession are actively offering sponsorship. However, I understand that employer sponsorship carries risks. For example, if the company goes into administration or withdraws the nomination before the visa is granted, my application could collapse.

I am debating whether to either

1. Work for a stronger, more reputable company and rely on my own points for skilled migration

OR

2. Accept the best sponsorship deal available and pray for the best

If you were in my position, which path would you choose? Thanks in advance for all the advice given.

Heyo, I'm a 22 year old Asian guy based in Australia. Have been on T on and off for the past 4 years now.

Got back into the dating scene a few weeks ago after a 3+ year hiatus and just hoping to brush up my social skills. Looking for mostly friendly chats, but if the vibes are right idm nsfw ones either.

Hobbies/interests include hitting the gym, top-rope/bouldering, and playing games on my Switch. Generally a very active and outdoorsy person when I'm not swamped with uni assignments.

Dm's are open, come say hi, I don't bite! (unless you want me to ;))

I've always wanted a partner since I was young. I grew up loving cheesy romantic stuff and wanted that rom-com type of relationship where two people genuinely cherish each other.

I'm 22 now and have only really been on a handful of dates. I basically put dating on pause for the last 3 years because life got busy: moving abroad for uni, studying, working, and learning to live alone. I would chuckle to myself when friends would complain about really wanting a partner.

Recently though I started feeling really empty in the dating department. I even developed limerence for a lecturer for a while, and I think that was what made me realise I actually wanted to try dating again.

I updated my dating profile and suddenly got 8 matches in a week, even though I previously had no luck. Instead of feeling excited, I felt overwhelmed. I only wanted one person, not "options," so I narrowed it down to one girl.

As a 5'5 Asian trans guy who got bullied growing up and struggles with anxious attachment, having someone I found really attractive want to go out with me felt amazing. I got so attached to the possibility of it working out, that she would finally be my first partner, and started thinking about our future.

We went on a date and I had then realised within the first minute that I was not attracted to her. I still did all the gentlemanly things like pay for her tickets, brought her food and walked her to her car but it all felt like I was going through the motions. She rejected me gently when she told me she got home safe and I felt devastated, I cried for a few days and could barely sleep. Looking back, I think I was mourning the idea that she could finally be "my person" more than I was mourning her.

Now I'm confused: I still want a relationship, but dating feels exhausting. Every time I get a match I almost shut down and replying feels like a chore. And when I put in effort, I start getting carried away.

I'd rather meet someone organically, but as a trans guy who passes pretty well, I also carry this fear of developing feelings and then being rejected when they find out I'm not cis.

Has anyone else wanted to be in a relationship while simultaneously feeling exhausted by dating itself? How do you know if you actually want a relationship versus just wanting the idea of one? And if you've felt this way before, how did you stop feeling so consumed by wanting companionship?

I’m curious about what people think of group pictures on profiles.

For example, imagine someone has six pictures total. The first five are of themselves only, but the last one is of them with their friend group. They’re positioned in the center of the photo.

Does this generally come across as a positive (shows they’re social, have friends) or a negative (harder to tell who’s who, less focus on the individual)?

And if the other faces are blurred, does that actually help, or does it just look odd?

Consensus: yes or no on group pics?