u/Southernsoldato

I was collecting protection pay from a few folks, and some mother fUCKER PAID ME IN SINGLE AHN NOTES. Who even HAS those anymore?! So, now I look suspicious carrying TWO duffel bags of single Ahn notes. I’m so mad but I can’t stop laughing, But I don’t think my sottocappo is gonna find this as funny as I dom. But seriously ? Single notes? Is that even legal tender anymore?

Hey, Lewis here. I guess I Just needed to write down some thoughts

I Just feel so strange lately, I'm a capo now, and its nice, I no longer have to hide my feelings towards my lovers, I don't have to flinch at every little sound.

And yet, here I am. I'm more scared than I was as A Soldato, I brace for punishment anytime someone walks past, I bare my teeth whenever I get angry.

I can't trust anyone here. I don't feel like Me anymore, I feel like I've been hollowed out to create a nest.

I used to be so happy

When did I become so paranoid

What the hell did you do to me.

There is a really cute capo with really fluffy brown hair and hes a short king and hes got sharp teeth ... What branch is he. I must know..

... apparently you aren't supposed to actually *Drink* energy drinks, but sip them.

Lesson learned I guess. ... i will say, the way I got so Focused was awesome, everything else though was.. uhm.

I also think i might have killed a man

One of my Soldatos gifted it to me. Orange flavored, Tasty, my brain feels like its full of electricity, icould go a million miles right now

Chasing someone down

So, I had a weird as hell dream last night, and this dream was all over the place, first I was shopping then I was running from the Mob, then I was helping people break out of prison? Weird dream.

anyway, One of the things in the dream, and I remember this distinctly- Was a Foxglove Latte

foxglove is a toxic plant. That can kill you. And apparently (Much like other toxic flowers) has an awful taste.
so why someone would make a flavored latte of it is beyond me.
what’s worse is that me and my friends all ordered it.

From what I remember- it was made with real foxglove nectar and none of the toxic parts… And it was purple.
obligatory don’t make the poisonous plant latte.

Dear, Luca.

I know that you’re on a mission, an important one at that, and I know It’s dangerous. Please just stay alive.
I know you’ve always been something of a romantic deep down, but please don’t let this be another Romeo and Juliet Story.

I’m still alive.
Please, please. Just come back home alive, I don’t know if I’ll be able to forgive myself if something happens to you.

I need you, Luca.
Your senior, Lewis Foxtrot

Hey, I need some genuine genuine genuine help. I was never allowed to express my anger freely as a kid, or feel it, or show any signs of frustration. so now As an adult, I have zero fucking coping skills for this shit, and I end up blowing up on people who don’t deserve it.

I've tried the works, counting to ten, meditation, writing down my feelings. What have you.

it just doesn’t work for me, and my anger has taken over me a lot lately, and I fucking hate it, In fact, I hope that they REMOVE the ability to feel anger from me.

what do I even do at this point? I’m completely fucking lost. I need help.