Literally I have 0 luck with relationships. Istfg everyone at my age already dated/is dating someone and only I have like 0 experience. What is so wrong with me? The only thing I ever had was some bi-curious bitch who decided to play with my feelings. Ugh...
Literally I have 0 luck with relationships. Istfg everyone at my age already dated/is dating someone and only I have like 0 experience. What is so wrong with me? The only thing I ever had was some bi-curious bitch who decided to play with my feelings. Ugh...
Literally I have 0 luck with relationships. Istfg everyone at my age already dated/is dating someone and only I have like 0 experience. What is so wrong with me? The only thing I ever had was some bi-curious bitch who decided to play with my feelings. Ugh...
Me and my friend talked on the weekend and I basically stayed up to 3 am just to talk to her. Sometimes I don't really think much and say some dumb shit and this time she said she's kinda falling for me remembering the picture I sent her some time ago but not to worry cuz she wouldn't hit on me and I replied with just talking that actually I've bonded with her quite a bit and said that I actually a bit anxious that I might develop some feelings for her (I'm actually questioning whether or not I have a crush on her) and that if she hit on me she would have a high chance of success. We continued to talk about this and she said she has really gotten close to me too and that it's rare for her to be shown this much affection and just kept calling me cute and said if I developed feelings that would be completely normal and stuff and then also said I'm like an older sister to her which I'm not really sure how I feel about that part.
Then she started talking that she would like to be more open when she's close to someone but she feels like she will never work out with anyone or never be enough for them. She said it's hard for her to accept her love and continue to move forward with them and that she's scared if she gives all of herself to somebody they will hurt her badly so she always ends up running away. That she actually fears the person who does like her might actually be the right one but that her fear would stop her from accepting their love. I wanted to tell her that she needs therapy but I kept myself from saying this because we've talked about other mental issues she has before and I told her that therapy would be good for her to which she said she's been to therapy but she was so anxious that she skipped sessions and then stopped going altogether so I didn't push it. Still convinced her that she needs medications and to at least visit a psychiatrist which she did. It's an issue I can't really help with. I'm not a therapist. I told her the right person would possibly help her get through it. She replied that she's scared they'd eventually get tired to which I said that if they're the right person then they won't get tired. Which is kind of a lie. I wanted to console her somehow. Even if it's the right person they might get tired and overwhelmed because they're just human and I don't think there's much someone can do in this situation but idk.
Somewhere in the conversation I jokingly said I wouldn't know anything about relationships anyway cuz I'm bitchless and never been in any relationship. She then started saying that if I am bitchless then what is she if she only ever had situationship/friends with benefits type of thing. I said I don't even have that because that would imply people are actually interested so she still achieved much more than I ever could lol. She started saying that she doesn't understand how someone can not want me because aside from being beautiful I have an amazing personality so I just said most people just see me as a good friend and nothing more. That's it. I'm just not wanted. She said that I'll surely meet someone that I can get close to and maybe enter a relationship later so I just said that there's not really any opportunities to meet people here. All people I've been into already rejected me and there's not really much people I could get close to as I have nothing in common with them so we really have nothing to talk about. I also said I wasn't looking for consolation and no matter what someone will tell me about finally finding someone someday, it won't really change the fact that I just know I'm undesireable. Then I fell asleep because for me it was a bit after 3 am and on Sunday morning I woke up to a message that she was apologizing if she upset me and stuff so I texted her back that I wasn't upset. I just said that I don't need consoling. In said message she said she's sure that I'll find someone who I can get close to even if I have nothing in common with. So I also said that there's no opportunities to meet people here and that when I don't have anything in common with someone then I just lack the desire to get close to them. I wouldn't have anything to talk to with them anyway. I also said that usually when I have someone I'm really close with and bonded with then I just tend to focus on them and simply lack the desire to meet and get close to someone else. In this case I'm already close and I've bonded with her so for now that's enough to me and that realistically if I was to fall for anybody it would be her. I also explained why I feel like I'm simply unwanted and undesirable for other people.
Honestly this whole conversation was overwhelming for me and idk I keep coming back to it and thinking about it. She hasn't replied yet and probably won't until the weekend. I don't know what to feel about it tbh. I guess this was just a vent.
Me and my friend talked on the weekend and I basically stayed up to 3 am just to talk to her. Sometimes I don't really think much and say some dumb shit and this time she said she's kinda falling for me remembering the picture I sent her some time ago but not to worry cuz she wouldn't hit on me and I replied with just talking that actually I've bonded with her quite a bit and said that I actually a bit anxious that I might develop some feelings for her (I'm actually questioning whether or not I have a crush on her) and that if she hit on me she would have a high chance of success. We continued to talk about this and she said she has really gotten close to me too and that it's rare for her to be shown this much affection and just kept calling me cute and said if I developed feelings that would be completely normal and stuff and then also said I'm like an older sister to her which I'm not really sure how I feel about that part.
Then she started talking that she would like to be more open when she's close to someone but she feels like she will never work out with anyone or never be enough for them. She said it's hard for her to accept her love and continue to move forward with them and that she's scared if she gives all of herself to somebody they will hurt her badly so she always ends up running away. That she actually fears the person who does like her might actually be the right one but that her fear would stop her from accepting their love. I wanted to tell her that she needs therapy but I kept myself from saying this because we've talked about other mental issues she has before and I told her that therapy would be good for her to which she said she's been to therapy but she was so anxious that she skipped sessions and then stopped going altogether so I didn't push it. Still convinced her that she needs medications and to at least visit a psychiatrist which she did. It's an issue I can't really help with. I'm not a therapist. I told her the right person would possibly help her get through it. She replied that she's scared they'd eventually get tired to which I said that if they're the right person then they won't get tired. Which is kind of a lie. I wanted to console her somehow. Even if it's the right person they might get tired and overwhelmed because they're just human and I don't think there's much someone can do in this situation but idk.
Somewhere in the conversation I jokingly said I wouldn't know anything about relationships anyway cuz I'm bitchless and never been in any relationship. She then started saying that if I am bitchless then what is she if she only ever had situationship/friends with benefits type of thing. I said I don't even have that because that would imply people are actually interested so she still achieved much more than I ever could lol. She started saying that she doesn't understand how someone can not want me because aside from being beautiful I have an amazing personality so I just said most people just see me as a good friend and nothing more. That's it. I'm just not wanted. She said that I'll surely meet someone that I can get close to and maybe enter a relationship later so I just said that there's not really any opportunities to meet people here. All people I've been into already rejected me and there's not really much people I could get close to as I have nothing in common with them so we really have nothing to talk about. I also said I wasn't looking for consolation and no matter what someone will tell me about finally finding someone someday, it won't really change the fact that I just know I'm undesireable. Then I fell asleep because for me it was a bit after 3 am and on Sunday morning I woke up to a message that she was apologizing if she upset me and stuff so I texted her back that I wasn't upset. I just said that I don't need consoling. In said message she said she's sure that I'll find someone who I can get close to even if I have nothing in common with. So I also said that there's no opportunities to meet people here and that when I don't have anything in common with someone then I just lack the desire to get close to them. I wouldn't have anything to talk to with them anyway. I also said that usually when I have someone I'm really close with and bonded with then I just tend to focus on them and simply lack the desire to meet and get close to someone else. In this case I'm already close and I've bonded with her so for now that's enough to me and that realistically if I was to fall for anybody it would be her. I also explained why I feel like I'm simply unwanted and undesirable for other people.
Honestly this whole conversation was overwhelming for me and idk I keep coming back to it and thinking about it. She hasn't replied yet and probably won't until the weekend. I don't know what to feel about it tbh. I guess this was just a vent.
I just mentioned I really bonded with her and stuff and that I feel like she's the only person who really understands me and she mentioned she got really close to me too and she said the things she loves about me and then said I am like an older sister to her. How do I even react to that 😭?
I just mentioned I really bonded with her and stuff and that I feel like she's the only person who really understands me and she mentioned she got really close to me too and she said the things she loves about me and then said I am like an older sister to her. How do I even react to that 😭?